wording invites without hurting feelings

FHs parents are divorced and remarried. his realy father hasnt really done much of anything for him and lives out of state. His step dad has been there through everything.

I know that i can do the whole 'together with their parents' wording, but i want my parents names on their since they are helping out a lot with the wedding and also want his mom and step dad on their since they too are helping with the wedding

so how can this be done? do i exclude his father/step moms names on the invite? do i list both? but then i feel if i list both his mom would be hurt since he really hasnt been much of a dad to FH and her husband has. and then would his real dad be PO that its listing FHs mom and husband as parents?

this stuff is so complicated, i dont even want to think about what the church and intros at the RH will be like...


Mr. & Mrs. XXX
request the honor of your presense
at the marriage of their daughter
Gina XXX
to
James XXX
son of Mr. and Mrs. ZZZ (different last name as FH)

UGH...this is a hard one...sorry...I have nothing to offer...

I'm sure someone will be able to help...sorry...

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Posted by katleigh3

UGH...this is a hard one...sorry...I have nothing to offer...

I'm sure someone will be able to help...sorry...

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you stink j/k

thanks anyway.. i know its so hard.

i think in the end i will prob just leave off his dad and step mom since they have really done nothing for FH or even call him. its just so hard to make that decision since it will look wierd being that his mom has a different last name now a we are saying they are both his parents when he has a dad who is still alive.. does that make sense?

Hmmm thats tough. My parents are divorced and only my dad is remarried. What I did was put

Ms. XXXX XXXX(moms maiden name) &
Mr. XXXX XXXX (dads last name, which is the same as mine)
(my name)

That way both their names were on there and I wouldn't hear anything from them.

Sorry I re-read your post. Maybe you should do:

Mr. XXXXX (FH dad)&
Mr. and Mrs. XXXX (FH stepdad and mom)
(FH name)

If anything you can always ask FH mom and see what she thinks about the wording.

I hope you can work this problem out.

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Posted by jgl

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Posted by katleigh3

UGH...this is a hard one...sorry...I have nothing to offer...

I'm sure someone will be able to help...sorry...

---

you stink j/k

thanks anyway.. i know its so hard.

i think in the end i will prob just leave off his dad and step mom since they have really done nothing for FH or even call him. its just so hard to make that decision since it will look wierd being that his mom has a different last name now a we are saying they are both his parents when he has a dad who is still alive.. does that make sense?

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It def. does make sense...I think I agree with Heather...why include him now?

Okay...maybe I do have something to offer...=)

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Posted by FtrMrsV

Hmmm thats tough. My parents are divorced and only my dad is remarried. What I did was put

Ms. XXXX XXXX(moms maiden name) &
Mr. XXXX XXXX (dads last name, which is the same as mine)
daugther of .....

That way both their names were on there and I wouldn't hear anything from them.

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thanks! but i would def have to put FHs step dads name on there.. since his mom and step dad have been great to him and us and helping with the wedding.

i guess its just the matter of not putting his real dad on the invite. i think i just have to grow 'balls' and just do it

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Posted by wo0shply

had a similar problem but i wrote it the same way you wrote it.

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so you left off one set of parents?

thanks for the reply!

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Posted by katleigh3

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Posted by jgl

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Posted by katleigh3

UGH...this is a hard one...sorry...I have nothing to offer...

I'm sure someone will be able to help...sorry...

---

you stink j/k

thanks anyway.. i know its so hard.

i think in the end i will prob just leave off his dad and step mom since they have really done nothing for FH or even call him. its just so hard to make that decision since it will look wierd being that his mom has a different last name now a we are saying they are both his parents when he has a dad who is still alive.. does that make sense?

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It def. does make sense...I think I agree with Heather...why include him now?

Okay...maybe I do have something to offer...=)

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yes see you did have something to say that helped!

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Posted by Mimacat

Why don't you ask both of your parents and see what they think?

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FHs mom would NEVER tell me to do it a certain way she would leave it up to us but i think her feelings would be really hurt if we put his dads name on there

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Posted by FtrMrsV

Hmmm thats tough. My parents are divorced and only my dad is remarried. What I did was put

Ms. XXXX XXXX(moms maiden name) &
Mr. XXXX XXXX (dads last name, which is the same as mine)
(my name)

That way both their names were on there and I wouldn't hear anything from them.

Sorry I re-read your post. Maybe you should do:

Mr. XXXXX (FH dad)&
Mr. and Mrs. XXXX (FH stepdad and mom)
(FH name)

If anything you can always ask FH mom and see what she thinks about the wording.

I hope you can work this problem out.

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This sounds like a good option. I would definitely ask for his mom's opinion on this. I hope everything works out!

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Posted by wo0shply

yup in my case I left out my step mom... since I'm not close to her at all... new marriage.

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ok thanks!!!

ill prob just leave off his dad and step mom and just list mine and FHs mom and step dad. They are the ones who have been there for us and who are contributing to the wedding, its only fair that they get their names mentioned

glad I could help