Words cannot describe... updated.

i cant describe how i feel. i need to vent bc this is killing me. i found out yesterday that my nephew has been molested by a friend of another nephew of mine. i can't describe what i feel and honestly, i want to kill this kid that did this to my nephew. my nephew is 10 years old and this saddistic peice of sh*t kid is 16. why would he do this? why would he mess up this poor innocent kid? i dont know how to deal with this. i dont know how to act around my nephew. if anyone has any advice on this at all, please send me a message because i dont know what to do.

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guys here is an update.

i got a call from my sister who met with the da today. the rape kit test came back positive and they have all the evidence they need. the peice of crap kid who did this should be confessing tomorrow. he will be getting a minimum of 1 year behind bars. i don't see this being enough punishment but at least he is not getting away with this.

I'm really really sorry to hear this. There's a lot of websites out there that offer support and advice on this, I would Google. And just be supportive, that's probably the most important thing right now. Let everyone (including your nephew's parents) how much you love them and will be there if they need it.

I am so sorry that this happened to your nephew. If anyone did this to any of my nieces or nephews I would feel the same.

I agree that there are many resources on the web for helping family members deal with such incidents. As for acting around your nephew don't act any different. Treat him as you always have. He will need to see that everything else is his life is still constant.

Many hugs to you and your family.

I'm so sorry to hear this I would just continue to act normally around your nephew. The last thing he needs it to be treated differently and have a constant reminder of what has happened. I would also google support forums and stuff like that and maybe chat with some people who are going thru or went thru the same type of situations and how they have gotten thru it.

OMG! This is indescribable I can't even imagine how you must be feeling let alone how your nephew and his parents are feeling. The best thing I can say is to get him to counseling immediately. This is so sad. I am terribly sorry!

A lot of teenages who molest children were in fact, molested themselves. This teenager should NOT be excused, but please don't threaten him. He needs hlep.

Please just be there for your nephew. Make sure he gets the help he needs, and make sure he knows he has people around him who love him and who he can trust should anything like this (g-d forbig) ever happen again.

Please feel better. I'm so sorry you (and your nephew and family) are going through this.

I can't even begin to imagine how you and your family must feel. My son is 10 and I think I would need just as much counseling as he would. I am truely sorry and pray that things only get better. I am sure it's going to take some time but you need to be there for him and show him as much love and comfort you have to offer. Talk to him and let him understand that you are there for him no matter what. He is definitly going to need some professional help. And I really hope you are pressing charges against that kid... he's lucky be alive !!!

I really am soooo sorry

Im sooo sorry to hear this, that is just horrible, anything like this involving young kids is just sooo heart renching. How is your nephew acting? normal, weird, what are his signs? Has anyone sat with him and talked to him? or the molester? My nephew is 11 and if anyone touched him, theri body would never be found

I cannot even say how sorry I am that you are dealing with this. I don't even want to offer advice, because this is a matter so serious that I am afraid to say something completely wrong.

What I WANT to say is to treat your nephew the same way you always have. I think the embarrassment of him knowing that everyone else knows would compound the problem. And then, when all those people start to treat him differently, it would further compound his issues because maybe he will start to BELIEVE that he is different now.

Then again, does he need people to recognize what happened? To say, yes, this happened, let's deal with it?

I truly do not know. Please please seek some professional advice on this one, and don't try to resolve it yourselves, because there are a lot of good arguments to both approaches, yet I'm sure there have been scientific studies and research which show the best way to proceed.

I am just so sorry for you and your family right now. Maybe joining some kind of group that fights against this kind of thing would help direct some of the rage I'm sure you are feeling.

And I understand the previous poster's comment that the molester was probably molested himself. However, if I were in the same situation, this would mean nothing to me, and I would want to tear him apart and crush his whole family.

Looking at this situation from the outside, I can only say to you to please not attack this kid or his family, and let the authorities deal with it. The pain your family is feeling will only be magnified if they have to deal with one of you going to jail.

THAT DOESN'T MEAN I WOULDN'T TELL EVERYONE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD THAT 'SOMETHING HAPPENED' WITH THIS KID (THE 16 YEAR OLD) (without outing your nephew as the victim).

I hate to put anything on your family right now, but please be responsible to follow through with this all the way. Make sure this kid is known to be a sex offender. Put up leaflets if you must, because he cannot be allowed to do this to anyone else.

I am so beyond sorry that this has happened to your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do. And I know it sounds cruel, but I hope that after this kid is outed to the entire neighborhood, and dragged through the legal system, he 'takes care of his problem himself.' If you know what I mean.

My most heartfelt best wishes to you and your family.

I'm so sorry for what your family must be experiencing right now. I can't even imagine how you all must be feeling. My prayers and thoughts go out for all of you that you can make it past this.

I WILL PRAY FOR YOUR NEPHEW AND YOUR FAMILY..

im so sorry this happened to your nephew...i cant imagine what u and ur family and most important ur nephew r going through.i would say to to treat him as u would every day because im sure he does not want to be treated diffrent,he just wants his life to go back to the way it was.i think u should look into some counsling for your entire family who can help u through this time..im so sorry..hth and good luck

I am so sorry. I know you don't know how to act around this child, but please treat him as normally as possible. He will need a lot of counseling and support from everyone in his life. He needs to know he did nothing wrong and everyone still loves him exactly the same.
As for the other friend, while I'm sure you want to kill him. Being so young, he also needs a lot of help.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, and I'm praying for your nephew and your family.

Edited to add: I agree with pp. Make sure this 16 year old does have to register as a sex offender. Most offenders are repeat offenders, and you don't want him to inflict this pain on another.

you just gave me the chills, to think I have a 13 yr old son and if someone were to do that to him
Im soooo sorry this is happening to him.

I'm really sorry to hear you are going through this, just stay prayerful and let him know you are there if he needs someone to talk to

i am so sorry