Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

Irishbride Posted: Dec 23, 2003 11:25 AM

Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

FH and I rent out our basement apartment. The couple have been here for 4 years and we are pretty good friends but I feel that we have no privacy in our own home. FH and I where not home Sat night, when we got home Sunday our front door was unlocked. FH has talked the them several times about this. they are 'allowed' to use our front door when the weather is bad. Plus they smoke in our part of the house b/c they have a baby and dont smoke in the basement. I dont mind usually but when we are not home they should not be in our part of the house. The 'guy' is always in and out of our part of the house. Plus I went to look for a beer in our fridge - all gone!!! Fh says he told them they could take them. Which is fine but replace them! I told FH that I would talk to 'girl' but he did it b/4 I got home and now she is pissed at us! I cant stand the drama. This is OUR home WE set the rules not them. I would NEVER go into their apartment when they where not home. Just had to vent. Thanks.

casg Posted: Dec 23, 2003 11:37 AM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

maybe she is embarresed ?
in return she is mad

The Original 2nd-time-around Posted: Dec 23, 2003 11:42 AM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

Being a landlord myself, YES, I'd be upset!! BUT, I've never become friends with tenants. It seems that you've become friendly and now they've crossed the line. I'd TRY to get it back to a 'business' relationship.
JMO

nrvbrd Posted: Dec 23, 2003 11:44 AM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

Ok, I am getting livid reading this.

Things have to change.

Your home is YOUR home, your part of the house should be off limits to them. They should not be able to come and go as they please.

This cannot go on any longer/

MizStinker Posted: Dec 23, 2003 12:51 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

This is unacceptable behaviour -

I am a tenant - I would NEVER EVER go into my Landlords part of the house Ever period - Change your front door locks now.

LizD Posted: Dec 23, 2003 12:58 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

That is completly unacceptable. They should not be in your part of the home at all. I would get this straight now, that you feel taken advantage of and change the relationship back to tenant/lanlord, change the locks so they can not get into your part of the house, etc. What if while you were out on Saturday noght someone broke itto your home b/c they left the door unlocked

nrvbrd Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:09 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

I am not happy about this situation- still

Lisa Rose Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:16 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

I lived in my apt for 8 years and didnt step foot in my landlady's apt until 6 months before we moved out. I never would have even thought about going into her apt!!

I would change the lock on the door....that will let them know who owns the house!

ChristineC68 Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:18 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

Posted by Lisa Rose
I would change the lock on the door....that will let them know who owns the house!

Ditto!

There is no reason for anyone to be in your house 'just because' when you are not there.

Irishbride Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:18 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

I am not happy either about it. But we shall see what happens. maybe I will start going into their apartment and nosey around. FH is too good to them. He gives them a little they take miles. aghhghghghgh!!!!!!!!

I will have to see how the mood is when I get home. I will talk to her about it.

PrincessRose Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:33 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

We're looking for a place to live, and we're GREAT tenants! (we don't smoke, have no pets...)

yabbobay Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:38 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

its unacceptable for tenants...but to be honest...its acceptable for some friends (IMHO)...don't know if you are THAT close with them...but would it be different if your best friend came in and drank a beer when you were not home?

Irishbride Posted: Dec 23, 2003 03:47 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

FH is very close with the guy. I have only started to be 'friends' with the girl. I like her a lot but I feel there should be a line drawn that you dont cross. I dont do it to them so I expect that it should not be done to me. If we are home I dont care they can hang from the windows.

jannshari Posted: Dec 23, 2003 04:15 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

I'm sure my opinion is not one you will want to hear, but honestly, the only reason why you are in this position is because of your own actions. Now, before you get angry, let me explain. I am not saying that you are a bad person and that what you did was wrong. However, you have blurred the lines between the landlord-tenant relationship and that of friends. It's unfortunate, but in order to maintain the right to tell them what they can and cannot do, you need to maintain the position of landlord, and not friend. They may be stepping way over the line here, but you have to admit that you led them over the line. You now need to be firm about what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. You need to let them know that, unfortunately, the arrangements are not working out, and that you think it best that they use their entrance only and not come into the main part of the house, unless specifically invited to do so.

You're going to have to be firm on this and not make any exceptions. I'm sorry you're in this situation, but it seems that you gave them an inch and they took a mile. I hope you are able to amicably work this out. Good luck!

Jen_n_Dale Posted: Dec 23, 2003 05:05 PM

Re: Would you be upset... (sorry longer than I thought)

Totally agree with everyone. That is so rude. I don't think I could even do that at my brother's house unless I asked. Maybe with her not talking to you will get back to a more business relationship than a friendly one.