would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Original post by Bridelikewhoa07

Aug 28, 2007 07:47 AM

ok...so obviously for our engagement party we invited lots of our friends....one person (& his wife) who we invited...i will say he is a 'work related friend' of FH's.... acted like a total jerk...

i made little bags of personalized m&m's for favors...he began throwing them at people as a joke...they wound up allllll over the floor! and not only did i spend lots of time & money on these, but then i had to kneel down IN MY DRESS at the end of the night & clean them up! (we had our e party at a local firehouse)

so MY QUESTION IS THIS..... would you invite him to your wedding???

he already got a 'save the date' and obviously was invited to the e party. but he acts like such an a$$ no matter where he goes! (he has a reputation for being obnoxious and doing off-the-wall things! in fact- hes the reason i wont put disposable cameras on the tables at the wedding bc i know i'll get 24 picctures of his a$$ crack!) Im sooo scared of what he might do at the wedding..he has no respect for anyone or anything. im scared he might offend someone in my family or something.

is it totally rude if hes not invited to the wedding, even tho he got an STD & came to our e party??? i dunno what to do! HELPPPPP!!!!

angl2001 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 12:03 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

if you are really that worried dont invite him! who cares if you gave him a STD already. I would not invite anyone who i think is gonna mess up my wedding day! you can always not send an invite and if he asks why he didnt get one say ' we had to cut out guest list, family has to come first so sorry' and be on your way. He is not family or a close friend so dont worry about it

JennysMOH Posted: Aug 28, 2007 12:31 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Posted by Bridelikewhoa07

i guess i will wind up inviting him bc otherwise it will be awkward..grrr!!!

his wife just sat there...but thats bc she is used to him being a jerk..he has been for YEARSSSS!!!

heres an ex...3 yrs ago we r at the local firehouse bc i threw a surprise party for FH... my sister walks by this guy carrying two pickle jars bc she was helping me set up...this guy says to my sister..WHO HE HAS NEVER MET BEFORE...... 'nice jugs!!!!'

my sister almost fell over!!!

crazyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ill just put him in the back corner & make sure i sit him with people who already know him and already know what an a$$ he is!

Put him as far away as you can and talk to the guys that will be at the table. Tell them the minute he gets obnoxious to please as a favor to you and your FH to get him out of the room. And tell RH if he starts to get out of hand to please escort him out.

poisonivy918 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 12:34 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

I wouldn't invite them! I mean I might joke and throw m&ms at my friends when we're just hanging out but at a party? that's just immature & rude.

CMaria81 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 12:42 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

ill just put him in the back corner & make sure i sit him with people who already know him and already know what an a$$ he is!

I personally wouldn't invite him. Yes, he got an STD but what he did an your engagement party was completely childish and uncalled for. What he said to your sister was completely rude as well. But IF you do invite him I would NOT put him next to people who are used to his behavior. I would put him far away from any of his friends at a table where he knows no one (except for his wife). He seems like the top of guy that has more confidence when around his buddies so I think he will be less likely to act up if he's around people he doesn't know.

Butterfly123 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 12:58 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Maybe you can have a serious talk with him. Explain how you love his sense of humor (even if you dont) but tell him to please control himself at the wedding.

tmarie Posted: Aug 28, 2007 01:11 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

If he is not a friend and only work realted you could cute him out. But for sure, your FH needs to have a chat with him and tell him that he better know how to behave at the wedding. If not, cut him out. People waste too much time worrying about people's feeling who in the long run you will probably not have in your life forever anyway.

Colette Posted: Aug 28, 2007 02:07 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Hmmmm WOW i would NOT want to invite him, but i see the difficulty in 'uninviting' him (for your FH)...
So if I were to include him, I'd give my BP, Photographer, Banquet Manager, and DOC (if you have one) EXPLICIT instructions to keep this mutant the h*ll away from me on the day.
Seat him far far away, near the kitchen or near the exit. THat way if the BM has to stop his shenanigans it wont be happening in the middle of the room.
Some people really just can't bear not being the center of attention!

jtgarsik Posted: Aug 28, 2007 03:06 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Posted by Bridelikewhoa07
in fact- hes the reason i wont put disposable cameras on the tables at the wedding bc i know i'll get 24 picctures of his a$$ crack!)
!!!!

too funny...it would be a little rude to not invite him but I feel your pain. My DH's co-workers at the time were like this. I talked to my general manager & told us to have no worries and that anyone we might feel would be a problem that day they would keep a close eye on. That night i reminded my maitre d of their table as well - and everything was fine!

klanghan Posted: Aug 28, 2007 03:20 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

if you don't want him there, don't invite him

ratherbealeper Posted: Aug 28, 2007 05:33 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

Posted by ChristineAaron08

If you do invite him. Give your matre'd instructions and permission to escort him out at the fist act of immaturity.

I TOTALLY agree with it. Most RH halls can deal with any tiny issue so flawlessly that even if he did something dumb, it'd be remedied before you even noticed.

Autumn08 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 05:42 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

I was at a wedding once where one of the groomsmen was so drunk and he ended up ripping the flower plants out of the planters... I'd be afraid of something like this. If he's a jerk, don't invite him. Do you really want to share a special occasion like this with someone like that?

Bridelikewhoa07 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 05:45 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

thanks for the advice ladies! i am still torn as to what to do. my FH having a 'talk' with him wouldnt do very much good...it might actually piss him off & make him act worse?

grrrrr!!!! so confused!!!

soon2BMrsDee Posted: Aug 28, 2007 05:54 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

I wouldn't... he's not family or a close friend??? Why worry about the possibility of him acting like an a$$ at your wedding and you having to pay for it?? (literally and figuratively) JMHO

Bridelikewhoa07 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 06:06 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

hes not a family or close friend...

the thing is he works with FH ANDDD is in the volunteer fire dept with him...has known FH since he was born pretty much...has known FH's mom & dad & rest ofthe family, etc forever.

i'm gonna talk to FMIL later tonight & see what she says...i feel like her opinion on it wil do a lot to help me.

thanks for all yoru help too ladies!! much appreciated!!!

cherandgeo Posted: Aug 28, 2007 07:56 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

No way would he get an invite for the wedding, save the date or not.

If he can be that rude to act like that I really don't think you have to worry about looking rude by not inviting him. :)

Bridelikewhoa07 Posted: Aug 28, 2007 08:30 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

ooohhhh... great point cherandgeo!!!! hmmmm

LIprincess Posted: Aug 28, 2007 09:50 PM

Re: would you invite this person??? (kinda long, sorry!)

I wouldnt invite him.. Its your most memorable day and you should have it perfect, and not have some person ruin it for you.. he isnt family and isnt even a friend. There are so many other things that you are going to worry about the day of. You shouldnt have him to worry about