x-post FROM NW-seperation anxiety

ahhh nobody is around on the nw board, so i'll post here.

sorry it's long but im toolazy too shorten it lol

Ok so on Saturday, DH and I got a puppy. Dh has been really wanting one. So we got the cutest little toy poodle, he is this apricot-ish color. Well looks like this light brown dogs, im retarded and cant describe his color. He has has these grayish eyes which will probably change as he gets older. He just turned 2 months on the day we got him and weighs 1 pounds, 15oz.

Saturday night when he got tired I put him in his crate, he didn't mind at all. Even woke up a few times to drink a water(we got the water bottle you put on the crate so i hear it at night) and even eat. Then at 5am he woke up crying so loud i felt so horrible and got up and stayed with him. Sunday again he was fine in the crate and infact when he is tired he goes in there himself to sleep. Sunday night same thing he woke up twice. I let him cry for 5-10 mins so he can get used to being in there and wont be too much of a shock when we go to work. But i give up and let him out. Thank god bc i realized now that the reason he cries is bc he doesnt want to pee in his crate and only cries to get out when he needs to pee, and im an idiot that made him wait.

I bought this big play den for pets, its just this long expandable metal thing you can form in a circle, or put 2 sides against the wall to have that space. I thought this would be better than leaving him in a crate for a few hours. He wasnt too fond of it, he doesnt like peeing in there either. So i puppy proofed the LR. I use the den thingy to cover the entire space with the tv and all wires. The space i leave him there is nothing for him to get into, even the space under the couch theres enough room for him to sit under there which he likes to do but its not low to the ground. The only other wires are the lamps which i unplug when i leave and put the cord on the table so he can't get to it. This worked out great yesterday which was his first day alone. Now im the worst bc i had tears leaving thinking he would really freak out and remembering how he cries in his crate(i realized after it was bc he needs to pee) I had an appt in LI yesterday morning so left later than usual, played with him for a while until he got tired went into his crate and when i left he didnt mind, i left the crate open. I also gave my dad my keys so he went to check on him and said when he went in he lifted his head but went back to sleep, so it was a good sign that he didnt go crazy when he saw someone. My appt ran longer than expected so got home around 12:30pm and called work and said i wouldnt be able to get there until about 2pm, so not gonna come in but they needed me to come in bc manager isnt coming in rest of week and had to leave project with me and give instructions. I stayed an hour and took the 1:50pm LIRR and went to work. He was fine when i left, and dh got home at 4:30 and said he was just sleeping on the floor and was fine.

I still had the worst anxiety yesterday and worried so much about him. You would think after he did well yesterday, i'd be fine today but I'm not. YEsterday wasn't bad bc he was only alone from 9:30-12:30 and he slept almost the entire time. Then alone from 1:30 to 4:30. Today will be much longer, I left him around 8am and dh is going straight to softball after work and i wont get home until at least 6pm. He was so hyper right before i left but once he saw i was leaving he went and laid down. Plus im afraid if it rains, and if it thunders he'll get spooked, he gets spooked by everything. The only good thing is my dad kept my house keys and said he'll come by today and spend some time with him. But again i have the worst anxiety, like a knot in my chest and guilt too.

Any tips from people with puppies or who had puppies. I guess maybe just in time it gets easier
What do you do with your puppies in the day when you're both gone.

He'll be fine. Dogs wont (or dont want to) pee in their area unless they have no other choice so I think its great he knows to tell you already.

DOgs can be fine left alone all day....if you really worry then you might want to hire a dogwalker. My sis leaves her dog home alone all day but a walker comes for about 45 mins a day and talk him for a walk and a little exercise. The only bad thing about having them home alone all day is that you have to be ready to play when you get home cause they have been sitting around by themselves all day. Also leave plenty of toys while you are gone to entertain them cause its when they are bored they get into trouble.

Awww, well congrats on getting the puppy...what is his name??? Post pics when you can!!

I thought at first when you posted about seperation anxiety you meant the puppy had it! It is better that you have it and not him. I think you'll get over it quickly. It is hard because this is your first week leaving him alone and he is so new. I am sure things will get easier. I think it is great that your dad will be able to go visit him today...see if he is willing to do that for the rest of the week to ease your mind. Honestly though, I think it will all be fine. Everyone just needs to adjust to this new situation. Sounds like the puppy is doing well though.

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Posted by alli3131

He'll be fine. Dogs wont (or dont want to) pee in their area unless they have no other choice so I think its great he knows to tell you already.

DOgs can be fine left alone all day....if you really worry then you might want to hire a dogwalker. My sis leaves her dog home alone all day but a walker comes for about 45 mins a day and talk him for a walk and a little exercise. The only bad thing about having them home alone all day is that you have to be ready to play when you get home cause they have been sitting around by themselves all day. Also leave plenty of toys while you are gone to entertain them cause its when they are bored they get into trouble.

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i was thinking of doing that, he cant be walked yet until he gets his 2nd round of booster shots, which will be about 4 months but yeah i might do that. For now i have my dad though lol, and trying to convince my cousin who is currently out of work lol.

But yeah youre right, i guess its us who freak out about them being alone but theyre fine. Yeah i left him a whole bunch of toys.

Thank you

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Posted by Cacarina

Awww, well congrats on getting the puppy...what is his name??? Post pics when you can!!

I thought at first when you posted about seperation anxiety you meant the puppy had it! It is better that you have it and not him. I think you'll get over it quickly. It is hard because this is your first week leaving him alone and he is so new. I am sure things will get easier. I think it is great that your dad will be able to go visit him today...see if he is willing to do that for the rest of the week to ease your mind. Honestly though, I think it will all be fine. Everyone just needs to adjust to this new situation. Sounds like the puppy is doing well though.

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Well i got the seperation anxiety bc i read all these things about it so i worried so much he would get it that i ended up being the only one i guess lol.

Thank you very much, his name was maxwell so dh wanted to keep max for him. I wouldve changed it lol but i said fine. Yeah i took some pics but havent uploaded but i will post soon.

People also say dogs have no concept of time.
(IMO, I think thats completely untrue, FH's dog knows when someone hasn't been around for awhile). However, on the bright side, if it is true, the puppy should be fine.
Is there anyone that can come over and play with him for a half hour or so during the day? Even if he can't go out, at least that would break up the time a little.

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Posted by SummerBride10

People also say dogs have no concept of time.
(IMO, I think thats completely untrue, FH's dog knows when someone hasn't been around for awhile). However, on the bright side, if it is true, the puppy should be fine.
Is there anyone that can come over and play with him for a half hour or so during the day? Even if he can't go out, at least that would break up the time a little.

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i hope it is true lol

but yeah i actually just called my dad and he just got there a few mins ago and is with him. He said he was playing a lot which is good bc he'll get tired probably and sleep during the afternoon

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Posted by Soon2bShea

He will be fine! I just got a puppy a few months ago from the shelter, and I was so worried about her at the beginning, even more so because she had separation anxiety from us, she HATED being left alone. (crying, barking, peeing on the floor from being scared) She would freak out. So I was always more or less guilty every time I went to work, worrying about her being alone. It took probably 2 months until she grew out of it and until I don't think about what shes up to at home! It will get easier!

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awww well glad she is better now, poor baby. Yeah thats why i was worried bc i know some people whose dogs were the same way.

You'll be just fine. I can't tell you how many times I leave and come home and Miller (my not quite 2 year old bulldog) is in the same spot he was when I left. He really will sleep while you are gone and occupy himself with his toys. And it soundsl ike you did a great job giving him a safe area to roam around in.

Just be sure to give him plenty of attention when you get home. Think about it...even if you were home all the time you wouldn't be giving him attention 24-7. It just wouldn't be possible. So it's okay that you aren't there all the time. He really will be fine.

And it's great that he goes into his crate because that his safe quiet place for him to 'get away from it all'. Sounds like the little guy is doing just great! Over time you'll get more used to leaving him...I still feel bad sometimes if FH and I have a busy weekend and have to leave Miller a lot, but honestly he's just as excited to see me if I have been gone for 2 minutes to get something out of the car or gone all day long at work. Congrats to you and DH on the new puppy!

Just make sure you dont project YOUR anxiety on the puppy.

It will make the puppy learn thats its ok to be anxious and you dont want that.

Congrats on the puppy!

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Posted by IrishBride1109

You'll be just fine. I can't tell you how many times I leave and come home and Miller (my not quite 2 year old bulldog) is in the same spot he was when I left. He really will sleep while you are gone and occupy himself with his toys. And it soundsl ike you did a great job giving him a safe area to roam around in.

Just be sure to give him plenty of attention when you get home. Think about it...even if you were home all the time you wouldn't be giving him attention 24-7. It just wouldn't be possible. So it's okay that you aren't there all the time. He really will be fine.

And it's great that he goes into his crate because that his safe quiet place for him to 'get away from it all'. Sounds like the little guy is doing just great! Over time you'll get more used to leaving him...I still feel bad sometimes if FH and I have a busy weekend and have to leave Miller a lot, but honestly he's just as excited to see me if I have been gone for 2 minutes to get something out of the car or gone all day long at work. Congrats to you and DH on the new puppy!

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yeah dh and i both play with him a lot, its good that on most days dh gets home earlier so wont always be as bad. But i even get up in the middle of the night to play with him lol, i am so exhausted. Last night i got up at 2am and 5am to stay with him. I play with him until he gets tired and put him back in the crate. Its funny bc i always woke up last minute for work and would always wake up, rush out the house in 20-30 mins. Now i wake up so early, to play with him and give myself time to get ready plus change his water bowl, his food and get his area all ready for him.

Thank you, all this does help a lot. Dh said maybe we should get a 2nd puppy to keep him company lol but right now its a lot of work with 1 lol

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Posted by Juhgail

Just make sure you dont project YOUR anxiety on the puppy.

It will make the puppy learn thats its ok to be anxious and you dont want that.

Congrats on the puppy!

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oh yeah i don't. I read all these sites about this and i even prepared him before monday. They said leave for a few mins and come back to show him you are coming back. It worked bc 1st he whimpered, but after than when i would walk out and wait a few mins then walk back in he was fine. Guess he realized we're coming back now. They also say dont make it too much of a big deal when you get home, act more casual. So i'll go up to him but more calm.

If he is doing fine i have no anxiety, my whole anxiety came from the fact that i thought he would get it. Like when dh got home early yesterday i was fine then. Or now knowing my dad is with him, im fine.

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Posted by Its2Snappy

My family actually brings all of the dogs to my grandmother's house. So, at one time there can be as many as four dogs together. As long as they all get along, then it works out great. You may want to consider getting a second dog. If that is not possible, just leave him alone longer and longer gradually and he'll be fine. Congratulations! Dogs are the best!

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we did think about a 2nd dog but not 100% right now.

A couple of thoughts..

1. Keep the radio on.
Sounds too simple but it works.

2. Give the dog a toy that he gets ONLY when you are away.
2a. One thing that is great are those toys that can hold a treat inside. The dog goes crazy trying to get that treat and it keeps them occupied for awhile.


HTH

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Posted by lori7570

I went through the same thing when I got my cat (she was 6 weeks when we got her). I found myself thinking about her alllllll day. She was home alone during her first thunderstorm and I still feel guilty about it (5 years later). But like someone else said thankfully it seems like you have the separationg anxiety and not the puppy....eventually you'll find that you are thinking about the puppy less and less in a worried way....good luck girlie!!

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yeah i think after the first week it'll be a little bit better lol. Once i see he is fine but today will be the biggest test bc its the longest he'd be alone during the day.

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Posted by AdriandSteve

A couple of thoughts..

1. Keep the radio on.
Sounds too simple but it works.

2. Give the dog a toy that he gets ONLY when you are away.
2a. One thing that is great are those toys that can hold a treat inside. The dog goes crazy trying to get that treat and it keeps them occupied for awhile.


HTH

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i leave the tv on

hmmm didnt hear about that one, i'll try it bc i just leave all his toys out for him. Thanks

aw denise, I feel your pain, well in this case I feel your separation anxiety. When we got ollie I felt terrible leaving her. We had the exact pen you talk about and she slept in there, in her crate at first. It was hard because she hated it and would yap the whole night until we let her out. She even learned that when she pees on the wee pad we'll let her out so she would faux pee just so she can come out of her pen! My heart aches when I think of that!

You'll get used to leaving him and he'll get used to being alone. Right now i understand he's a puppy so you do have to be there more but in a few months it'll all fall into place. Maybe we should leave our puppies together during the day so they have a buddy You're lucky you have your father that can come and watch him for a little while. My parents wouldn't do that!