XOXO

I do understand how your feeling - I need to send you some of these
But - I'm not sure if saying anything is a good idea - they may just think your being jealous and shrug it off. I don't know - I'm like you - I let things stew inside because I'm not sure how to handle things like this.
I'm sorry I couldn't give any great advice just wanted to send you some hugs!!!

Thanks so much!!
It's definitley a weird situation, bc the last thing I want to do is say something stupid and come off as the anti-social jealous friend! Oh well, thank you for the hugs, they are much appreciated!

I wouldn't say anything....

Give it some time and she will probably trip herself up somewhere.

I had a very similar situation once upon a time, and I regret never saying anything to my two friends. I stewed and stewed until it was like we had nothing in common anymore and I wound up cementing their relationship even more. By the time things surfaced, things got so bad that we don't speak anymore. It's been 3 years and I'm still heartbroken over it.

I'm not sure I would phrase it like your sister said, but I would maybe try to arrange something for just the three of you (maybe get tickets to something so she can't invite herself) and talk about how you've been feeling left out - not specifically about this new girl, but that you're feeling like you've lost touch and want to make sure they know how important they are to you.

That's just my advice - do what you feel in your heart is right.

thansk so much, your feedback is really nice to hear right now!
lol - lorsin, I actually was going to do an ambush approach, and invite them out when I know the other girl will be on vacation :) hee hee hee - it's the only point I think I would ever make, subtle, but heard!
you're all wonderful, thank you again!!!!

Your feelings are totally understandable. I had a similar situation in college (and to boot- this girl was my ex boyfriend's new girl friend- but she didn't know him or me while we were dating).

First of all, I think if your friendship is as strong as you say, and you have been through so much- no one will ever replace you or break down your friendship. Your feelings are totally valid and understandable- especially since they are all local and you are not.

This is what I did- one day when it was just the three of us I made a (half) joke to them that I feel like x is replacing me in the group. I said it with a smile on my face but a good friend can see through those smiles. They laughed and hugged me and told me no one could replace me. Once I felt a little more confident about my role in the trio- it was easier for me to accept this girl in- and she and I later became friends.

You can also say something like, I know this seems silly and its probably just my stress from the wedding and insecurity about being so far away from my best friends but...

True friends will understand you as long as you don't come across as accusatory (which I don't think you will).

I'd feel the same way.
My 2 best friends are twins and we've been best friends since kindergarten. When you are friends with someone THAT long, you are really like a part of their family. For this girl to just come in and expect to have the bond and closeness that you have with your friends overnight, it's just not going to happen.
If it were me, I'd talk to the 2 friends alone and tell them how you feel. I'm sure they'll understand and they probably don't realize how you feel because in their eyes, this girl could never take your place.

Good luck

thanks again ladies, I knew I could count on you for some great advice!!