Brides Helping Brides ™ - XOXO – Page 2

butterfly20 Posted: Aug 28, 2004 11:31 AM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

it doesnt sound rude, and why not mention it after they copied down to the littles detail.....
if you think they might copy your thank you card perhaps send their thankyou on a Different card from everyone elses.. then they wont be able to copy yours

randella Posted: Aug 28, 2004 01:26 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Posted by suven

Posted by JimmysBride

It doesn't sounds rude at all and it gets the point across.... I say use it!

Thank you! That was my goal!

I am going to use it...now, how long can I wait before I send it? I really don't want 'the kids' to copy that, too!

I think it sounds good- it is not rude.. but they know that you know, etc.

Just don't tell them what your planning on naming your first born!

LImom Posted: Aug 28, 2004 02:33 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Not rude at all! In fact it comes off sounding like you are sincerely pleased they could use your ideas. You probably are wasting your 'sarcasm' on them, for lack of a better term. If writing that helps get it off your chest, though, do it.
My immediate thought was that I hope there were lots of people at both weddings. They would have certainly noticed you did it first.
I want to say take it as a compiment and let it go at that. We all search for ideas, whether online, in magazines, or from other brides, but when too many show up in one place I can understand how you feel.

_____________

'Just don't tell them what your planning on naming your first born!'
_____________

This comment was too funny! Better yet, tell them you found the best name for your child and tell them something real weird. That may be fun too.

DebsNY Posted: Aug 28, 2004 02:39 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

I agree that it sounds good.

You could also think of this as a type of flattery - I think I would be annoyed too, but at the same time, they loved all the things that you did at your wedding enough to incorportated in their sons!

David'sbride Posted: Aug 28, 2004 11:28 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

That first born comment is too funny.

One name my FH and I always joke about is Abelard... yes, it's a real name... find a doozey of a middle name and tell them that's what you plan on naming the child Oh, and maybe add that you are planning on moving to (insert town that is mostly swamp land or above the Arctic Circle).

Bunnymonkey Posted: Aug 29, 2004 01:02 AM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Personally,I think you should let it go.

Thinking back on your posts, this has been eating your insides for months. It seems as if you really enjoy seething and being angry at others for how they behave. Thats fine if thats how you want to live, but it would give me an ulcer.

You are clearly angry and want to let them know, but your thank you is nice and your sarcasm won't translate at all. If you are really angry at these people, stop being so passive-agressive and call them up and tell them.

Dooodles Posted: Aug 29, 2004 01:48 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

I think you should say:
We are so flattered that Robert and his wife were so inspired by our originality to incorporate our ideas into their own day. What a fabulous honor. Thanks for sharing our day.

I think it's blunt and to the point while being polite about it. I know you try to rise above these ocassions, but later on you may regret not having said something.

Good luck!

Maribelle7777 Posted: Aug 29, 2004 02:17 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

I see why you are upset but try to think of it as they loved your ideas. I wouldn't mention it in the thank you card - but do say you would love to see them soon and see the lovely wedding pictures. Then if you do, you can kinda say 'oh how nice that you liked our program so much that you incorporated the font, color, etc into your own.'

But really, they probably just liked what you did and didn't think there was a problem using the same font. The wording - yeah that's kinda weird but I'm sure there was no mean intent to it.

ETA: I also wanted to add that maybe it's best that you do not allude at all to their son's wedding. Not addressing the fact that they copied everything at all to them might bug them more than mentioning it at all.

Don't worry about it - think of it as flattery.

HearzBellz Posted: Aug 29, 2004 03:37 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Posted by d&d05

What you have sounds fine- not rude at all.

But if you want to get the point across that you're annoyed by it, that doesn't. It almost sounds like you're happy about it, so they probably wouldn't think twice about using your TY.

I agree..but I do dnot think that the TY is an apporpriate venue for addressing this issue.

Also if you are so concerned with him copying your TY's...send a really ugly one - that'll be a good way of getting a bit of revenge

dita531 Posted: Aug 30, 2004 03:18 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

I think your thank you note is fine. I really don't think you should be upset though.

Remember plagiarism is the best form of flattery!

tourist Posted: Aug 30, 2004 03:41 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

I'd dont' thinkits nasty enough, actually, if that's what you are going for.

I don't know what else to say though,maybe regular thank you stuff, then,' Congratulations on Robert's marriage. I'm sure his wedding must have been lovely. I heard it was just like mine. '

I'd send them a really generic thank Hallmark thank you, with no thank you pic ( I actually got that once from a friend & I was a little offended) & then you can see if they copy that oo.
That would give me more satisfaction actually, b/c then you know there are just unoriginal dopes who copy anything at all.

RobNette Posted: Aug 30, 2004 04:47 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

First of all, the thank you is great! It enables you to share your acknowledgement of thier decision to emulate your wedding (perhaps a more positive way to look at it ) and you are being friendly and polite!

Second: to be honest, i don't understand why you are offended...though I was unclear about the dedication change situation..and that I can see being a sensitive subject. Honestly, I feel that imitation IS the best form of flattery...and lets face it...there are only so many ways to do things within certain parameters.

I have friends who can get all up in arms about people doing 'what they wanted to do' but the truth is... if someone is at your wedding, they notice what they want to notice, and they will appreciate some things and others not.
If the couple took total creadif for what they used..that's a little different..and just says something about their character. But we all got our ideas from somewhere..and even the ideas I thought of myself, I would be more than happy to share with others...
Just concider it the curse of being a creative person

Marisa&Brian Posted: Aug 30, 2004 04:54 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Posted by suven

No, he did not attend. His parents attended.

Edited to add: While at the wedding, they told my MIL that they loved everything and that they were going to bring everything home to their son so that he could have it at his wedding...

I don't understand why you're so annoyed. - His parents paid yours a compliment by letting them know just how impressed they were with your ideas and execution of them. - SO impressed that they were going to pass along all of your ideas to their son for his own wedding. - Don't take offense to this, but EVERYONE gets their ideas for the little wedding 'extras' from someone else ! Someone's wedding, someone's suggestion, a magazine, etc. - I think you should be flattered. - I don't think what they did was meant to be rude or disrespectful. -
MAYBE if they copied everything and NEVER paid your parents the compliment, then ok. - But I really don't understand why you're so bothered by it . -

lorsin Posted: Aug 30, 2004 05:00 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Posted by HearzBellz

I do not think that the TY is an apporpriate venue for addressing this issue.

Also if you are so concerned with him copying your TY's...send a really ugly one - that'll be a good way of getting a bit of revenge

I agree - the TY is not the appropriate place. Who knows if the parents' intent was to have him copy the items? They could have just been giving him ideas (like I take at every wedding I go to lately) and his bride-to-be decided to copy them to the letter. I wouldn't blame the parents unless I knew they were truly at fault.

If you are that annoyed and want to let them know, do it somewhere other than the thank you. They still did get you a gift and attend your wedding - the two things are separate and should be kept that way in my opinion.

suven Posted: Aug 30, 2004 05:02 PM

.

flyin'bride Posted: Aug 30, 2004 05:06 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Just one comment from me. I'm sure the couple that attended your wedding didn't attend just to steal your ideas, they came to celebrate your marriage. I'm sure they got you a gift as well. Feel flattered that they thought your ideas were so wonderful that they wanted to use them to help out their son (who obviously didn't have his act together). As guests it looks like they really appreciated all of the little details you used to make your wedding special and unique. I wouldn't even mention their son's wedding. Thank them for attending yours and sharing your special day. Don't make your wedding thank you about someone else... it was your wedding, its about you and your DH.

Elaina Posted: Aug 30, 2004 09:35 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Posted by JacnRob729

I think that you should definetely write that in the card. But I think you should also feel honored that people liked you ideas so much, that they used it at their wedding. Take it as a compliment. People are supposed to have their 'own' wedding, and if they could not do this on their own, feel bad for them. Just know that your wedding was your 'own', and that you had to lend your expertise to make someone else's wedding worthwhile

I agree.....everything we do is learned in some way so I would take it as a compliment

dm24angel Posted: Aug 30, 2004 09:50 PM

Re: I need to know if this thank you card sounds rude:

Don't be annoyed...What comes of it? they still are using your dieas no matter how you feel about..you can feel something but be the bigger person and accept as a compliment to your great taste..

If there are any of the same people at both weddings, the couple will look dumb for stealing or copying your ideas...

In the long run, it's ok to be mad, but what are you going to do about? If you express your anger the situation will still be as it is, so spend your time forgiving them for being uncreative...