XOXO

You gave her back? Already? Cats dont adjust as quickly as humans do..there were many ways in which to introduce them to each other...you gave up awfully fast...

This will happen again if you bring another cat into the house...or maybe Misu will be mean this time. It's an adjustment period. Cats don't like new cats....

I agree.
It took my cats almost a year to warm up to eachother!
but now they are GREAT!

Aw Jola I am sure that was a hard decision for you but you have to do what is best for Mishu. I have to tell you that is why Xena does not have a playmate

Jola,

sorry to hear about your kitty problems. I think it's tough to take an adult cat from the environment it was in and have it adjust quickly. But you also can't have Misiu fighting with it. Maybe try a kitten next time?

I'm sorry you had to give her back!
It really isn't fair to put your other cat in that sort of a situation if the other cat is being mean to her.....you would ruin the trust you'd build up with her.
I'm sure it was a difficult situation....i know how much you wanted this to work out!
Good luck finding a new playmate!

Animals aren't things you 'return'. If she was warming up to you, and now she's back in the nightmare of shelter life, it's going to be even harder for her to adapt to others.

Cats don't adapt to living with other people right away, it takes time and patience, and has to be done right. How could you just 'return' her? I don't understand...

Please don't adopt another animal until you are able to make a long term commitment (it usually takes approx. 6 months for cats to adjust to one another, and then they are fine).

Ok ladies, sorry some of you feel this way.

I have been raised around cats all my life.

We have introduced many cats into my mothers home and never was it like this.

This cat's personality was very different.

ALSO,

My DHs parents had 2 cats and they never got along. My DH had never seen 2 cats get along and play with each other.

I WANT that for him.

At my mothers house with the 13 cats I had at one time, there were also 2 that didn't like each other.

If my DH and I are only going to have 2 cats I want them to get along!!!!!!!!!!!!

wow....less than a week for adjustment??? I have to agree with July on this one. Whenever I bring my rescue strays into our house, it takes my cat a good three or four weeks before she accepts them into our home. There have been quite a few 'catfights' along the way....but things always work out (and I've had well over 30 cats in and out of this house)......I definitely think it was a bit soon....I'm sorry you're feeling upset about the situation, and I do hope you're able to find the perfect kitty for your household, but I really don't think you gave kitty enough time (and may have caused further psychological damage by throwing kitty back to the shelter environment)..... Poor poor kitty.....I'll see what I can do to find him a home that will want him forever.

it DEF took about 6 months for my new cat and older cat to get along.

i dont want to sound rude or mean, but that was definatly unfair to the kitten!

Jola,

Don't feel bad you did what is best for you, Konrad and Misiu!

Kat :)

Thank YOU Kathleen!!!!!!!!! .

I did not want to put us threw that exactly!

IF we got attached to her and she never got along with Misiu I would hate that for him.

I want Misiu to be loved by the other kitty as well.

i think it would have been worse for the kitten of you had kept her for 6 months to see if she'd adjust, and she didn't....then you would all be miserable for the life of the new cat.....
i think you made the right decision for your family!

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Posted by palebride



i think it would have been worse for the kitten of you had kept her for 6 months to see if she'd adjust, and she didn't....then you would all be miserable for the life of the new cat.....
i think you made the right decision for your family!

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Thank you Lori

i don't really understand why people are defending her so much. She really did a sh!tty thing to that poor cat.
I cant imagine giving an animal only a WEEK to adjust and then just saying 'f*ck it'. PLEASE?!. would you adopt a child and then wait a week to see if it would or wouldnt work out? i dont think so.
if you arent ready to adopt an animal and then take responsability for it.. DON't get one! once you adopt an animal it is YOUR responasbility..... it isnt a shirt. you shouldnt return it like one. it is a living animal with feelings.
big deal your other cat didnt accept it at first. Newsflash: it wont EVER accept another animal in a week!
i have THREE dogs an a cat. you think they all accepted one another in a week?! please!
maybe you shouldve thought about the consequnces BEFORE you made a lifetime commitment to it.

maybe she also needs to think about the cat she had first...why make that cat's life miserable?
a new cat coming into a situation should be timid - not angry and mean to the already established cat....i think that spells trouble.
if a cat is going to be mean from the start, it's going to be mean for life.
she had no way of knowing that when she adopted it.
better that she take it back a week after - BEFORE the cat gets used to her and her husband, so that it can make the adjustment to a new home better, than to wait 6 months to realize it's going to be nasty to her cat forever.

And I'm defending her because I think she's a nice person who loves cats and I don't think she would do anything intentionally to harm a cat. I think the cat she happened to adopt in this case was the wrong one, she realized her mistake and tried to fix it. I don't think she was shirking responisiblity....she was looking out for the well-being of her first cat.

i see your point and its not that i think she is a bad person or was intentionally trying to do 'harm' to the new cat BUT if you adopt a cat you MUST take in ALL situations BEFORE actually gettng it. you have to account for the fact that the older cat may not like it at first.
she did NOT give it enough time!!!!
maybe she shouldnt EVER get another animal then b/c she obviously isnt willing to put in the time and effort it takes to bring a new animal into the household!
THIS is the reason there are animals in shelters.
DON'T GET AN ANIMAL IF YOU'RE NOT WILLING TO DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!!!!!!
and dont make up lame excuses why you cant keep it either.
ETA: its not that i dont like Jola or anything like that... trust me its not. i like her.. But its THESE sorts of things that need to be addressed b/c it is a real problem with people adopting animals from shelters. everyne thinks if it doesnt work out they can just bring it back and i am just being brutally honest b/c it is the only way to keep animals in good FOREVER homes and out of shelters.

But she said that the new cat was mean to her old cat.....that isn't likely to change...

if the original cat was mean....that's normal and will take time to change....but if a new cat coming into a situation is mean to the original cat.....how can you punish your original pet by putting it in that situation?

What's done is done...I don't see how saying mean things to her and making her feel even worse about the situation is going to help.....

youre right whats done is done.... and i am not saying it to make her feel bad.... i am saying these things.. that are TRUE NOT MEAN so other people reading it will not make the same mistake. it is not fair! plain and simple!

ETA: i was adding to my last post while you were writing yours. maybe it will clear up alittle bit of what i am saying.

also, you say how the new cat was 'mean' to the older cat. BS. even if it is true it IS something that can/will change!
when i got Dharma she was 'mean' (really scared) of the other two dogs. she'd growl when they come near her and/or snap......
did i give her away after a week? NO WAY. i made a COMMITMENT to her!!!! and now she loves the other two and they love her.
its called dealing with it!
Like i said, i dont mean it to Jola personally. it is just that people need to learn from their mistakes. and other people can learn form HER mistake. i dont think she is a bad person at all.