XOXO

If FMIL is not willing to compromise and have it at a location that is convenient for you and your guests, I would suggest you not having her pay for it and you covering the tab yourself. At least then you will be able to pick a venue that you and FH would like.

It is one thing to offer to pay but your FMIL must also remember that this is still your wedding and all the planning and decisions that are done should be at best to accomodate the bride and groom and to make sure that you two are happy first.

If she can not agree to that, I would ask if she would maybe like to contribute to use the money for something else.

But extend your thanx and appreciation for her offer.

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Posted by Latrice

If FMIL is not willing to compromise and have it at a location that is convenient for you and your guests, I would suggest you not having her pay for it and you covering the tab yourself. At least then you will be able to pick a venue that you and FH would like.

It is one thing to offer to pay but your FMIL must also remember that this is still your wedding and all the planning and decisions that are done should be at best to accomodate the bride and groom and to make sure that you two are happy first.

If she can not agree to that, I would ask if she would maybe like to contribute to use the money for something else.

But extend your thanx and appreciation for her offer.

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yeah what she said...

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Posted by marc_rai

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Posted by Latrice

If FMIL is not willing to compromise and have it at a location that is convenient for you and your guests, I would suggest you not having her pay for it and you covering the tab yourself. At least then you will be able to pick a venue that you and FH would like.

It is one thing to offer to pay but your FMIL must also remember that this is still your wedding and all the planning and decisions that are done should be at best to accomodate the bride and groom and to make sure that you two are happy first.

If she can not agree to that, I would ask if she would maybe like to contribute to use the money for something else.

But extend your thanx and appreciation for her offer.

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yeah what she said...

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I agree!

It's terrible that such a happy time in your life, that one of the most important people can be so stuborn. If I told my mom that they placed basically su(ked, she would say, thanks for letting me know, where else could we go?

Take it into your own hands so you can rest easy about this and have it where you want and thank her for her generosity.

FMIL sounds like a real prize!

I would say thanks, but no thanks and have it where you want...you need to be happy with your choices!

That's a tough one!

She is paying... and she sounds like she's not willing to change her mind. It's too bad some people have to be so inflexible! They don't realize the impact it has on others. very selfish.

Heres what I would do: try to talk to her again - give her one more chance. If she still refuses, then right there, during that conversation, tell her you will have to decline her offer to have the dinner there. Be really polite the whole time so she has nothing to rant and rave about when the whole thing is said and done. Be firm, but honest. Tell her you don't like it and it's not what you want. Plain and Simple. Just don't stoop to her level and get caddy and snippy - thats when things get messy. You know?

She sounds like the kind of woman who wants to do the dinner there becuse someone she knows will be impressed by her choice. Your feelings don't mean anything. People like this amaze me...

Good Luck!

Why o why do people think because they are contributing that they can make all the decisions. Is it her rehearsal dinner? NOOOOOO!!!

My suggestion:

Say, no thank you and make it on your own. Invite her though. When she sees that she will not be the hostess of it anymore she will change her tune and pay for it. If the plan doesn't work out, then you will have a lovely dinner without her money or the heart attack!

Just dont back down.....this is YOUR RD .... you shoudl be able to enjoy yourself and if you are concerned about the place based on actual proof....well then Id say thanks but no thanks and do something yourself.

I hope you can work it out