XOXO

Original post by Wintersbride

Sep 11, 2005 10:34 AM

NPTbride Posted: Sep 11, 2005 11:59 PM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

Jackie, I am sorry that you are going through this difficult time. Remember, all that matters is that you are going to spend your life married to the man of your dreams. How you get to 'I Do' is not nearly as important as how you spend all the years together that follow.

My heart goes out to you.

kellwolfe Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:01 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

Oh honey there are no words But you have the single most important thing .....each other! A big wedding isnt going to give you guys a happy life!

I wish you and your FH all the best and a life filled rich with love!

hmpena Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:20 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I know this must be so hard on you. But as others have said, in the end you will be married to the love of your life. You'll still have a wedding and most importantly, a marriage. You'll be beautiful on your wedding day and you'll be married when it is done.

We're here for you!

chikita315 Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:20 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

At least you have each other. Best of luck!!!

cindyandkevin Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:29 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I'm so sorry!!!!! I don't see why you can't just have a smaller reception on a less grand scale. I'm sure you can work out something that won't be so costly but won't make you so upset. Whatever you decide, just remember that the marriage is the most important part and as long as you and your FH are happy then that's all that matters. We're always here for you to talk to!!!!!!

Blu-ize Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:37 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

there are much bigger things in life than a reception.

You have your health, love, family and each other. There is nothing more than that.

While I think this site is great, I think with all of the B2B and past brides talking on here, it's easy to get caught up in the whole planning part and lose sight of the reality.

You will marry your knight and you will never forget the sacrifices you both made to be together. It will make you stronger.

leese Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:47 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I am so sorry that you have to cancel everything. You aren't selfish, and at least you know what is most important at this time.

A couple of other gals said it, but there is no reason why you can't get married at a church or town hall and then have a simple party with your closest friends at a firehouse, knights of columbus, small restaurant or even a gathering at a house.

Our grandparents had this thing called 'a football wedding' back in the day. They'd get all dolled up, go get married at church (which was the BIG deal) and then come back and have sandwiches and drinks at someone's house or a hall. Their memories of their special day are amazing and there is no reason why you two, can't share in a small celebration.

Unfortuantely as someone said, going on this site and growing up in this area, we have to have the biggest lavish affairs. In other parts of the country and the world, people go get married and have nice celebrations. But it isn't the end all.

I wish you all the best!

cantwait2bewed Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:55 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

MY mom and dad got married at the courthouse and they have been going strong for 25 years. In all honesty if I had to do this I would and would be so happy about it. I know you want to have the wedding of your dreams but you can do that later on down the line. Your lucky to be able to marry your FH sooner, I wish i could do that. I suggested to FH that we should get married at the courthouse and then have the wedding later, but he was like no we can wait. Just remember you are marrying the love of your life.

JessicaM. Posted: Sep 12, 2005 10:59 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

these girls has said pretty much everything, but I just wanted to say that in the end, it's all about perspective. you can choose the way you want to think about this- and put either a positive or negative spin on it.

the posivites-
1) you are saving a TON of cash
2) your nearest and dearest CAN'T be any more happier that you've found someone you love to share your life with- even withouth the chocolate fountain!
3) you are starting a new life and family with the man you love, and won't be in debt up to your ears
4) you will look beautiful and radiant on your wedding day
5) you still are the FUTUREMRS.H.
6) you CAN still entertain, create wonderful memories and enjoy your day to the fullest..after all, it's probably the only think in the world (beside the birth of a child) that is really (when it's right) all about LOVE!

expensive hall, big name photog, florists and all that do not equal good food and good times. love, life, and family do.

your wedding will be BEAUTIFUL, SPECTACULAR, and the stuff of DREAMS....and all because the thing we really all dream about, is loving and being loved...

best wishes on planning your new (and improved) wedding!

enjft Posted: Sep 12, 2005 11:16 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I wish you all the best.

kaklesmay Posted: Sep 12, 2005 11:47 AM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

lulugrrl Posted: Sep 12, 2005 12:02 PM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I am soo sorry that this dream of yours did not happen, I want you to think about an option though. My little brother decided to get married in a short period of time, and he had NO MONEY for any type of wedding. So he did get married in the church (my dad officiated ) The bride wore her dress, and they had a BM and MOH. After the ceremony, all of the family and whatever friends wanted to come went to a really nice restaurant. We all paid for our own meals. My mom got a small cake for them. I want to tell you it was WONDERFUL. Granted there was no professional photographer, or DJ, or anything else for that matter...but it did not make a difference, we were all together and it was such a beautiful moment to share with my family. TRUELY SPECIAL. A day not to forget. For their honeymoon, they just stayed one night at a local hotel room, my mom put a basket of goodies in there for them, it was FABULOUS! SO maybe you can still have some of your dream, I think you may be surprised at what resources are out there, and how much family will want to help.

Best of Luck to you and any decisions you make

Noiva06 Posted: Sep 12, 2005 12:15 PM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

Awww... I'm so sorry to hear this! But honestly it's better that you recognize that you won't be able to afford a huge reception now, that start off your life together in total debt. I would consider having your marriage at the town hall, then have a celebration at home. This way, you still will be able to celebrate with your family and friends. Best of luck always and we are all here for you whenever you want to talk.

teany Posted: Sep 12, 2005 12:46 PM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

I just want to second what everyone else has said. It is totally fine for you to be upset that what you have been planning on for ages is not going to happen the way you thought it would. But I think you can have something just as special on a less grand scale. Pamper yourself a little bit at a spa (with some of the $$ you saved from those vendors!), get dolled up on the day-of and then have a special celebration with family and very close friends at a restaurant (think Miranda and Steve on SATC) or someone's house. You can even have your guests make the food -- I'm sure they'd be very happy to. It all comes down to the same feelings you would have if you'd gone through with a huge reception -- you will feel happy and in love and have the people you love around you to share a special meal. Just a small celebration so you can start looking forward to the future.

Blu-ize Posted: Sep 12, 2005 12:54 PM

Re: Please someone tell me this isn't the end of the world

My parents got married 53 years ago in a Chinese restaurant. She wore her dress, he wore a tux and had a great time. That's what their families could afford.

Just wanted to add that.