XOXO

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Posted by geegee827

I would give the same gift regardless of where they are holding the wedding. I usually start at $250 and go up from there depending on how close we are, etc...

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ITA!

I agree with the majority that i wouldnt base the gift mount on where they are having it just because they decide to be smart and not spend a gazillion dollars (like the rest of us ) doesnt mean they should get less of a gift JMO

No there isn't at all... but to be honest with you....
Someone I knew (I wasn't super close with this person) was getting married and they were going on and on about how much money it was and how much they were spending; which btw was a lot. So I at least wanted to make sure I covered my plate and FH's plate... so based on the info I was getting from them... I gave what I thought would cover the plate plus a little extra. Turns out.... they must have been exaggerating big time! Because when we go there.... there was no wayyyyy at all that this wedding cost what they were saying. It was a buffet style... the location or the room wasn't what I invisioned, the flowers, ANY of it! Not that there was anything wrong with the decisions they made for the wedding...but telling me it was that much more than it was... that's where I have the problem. I was kinda pissed...because I ended up giving wayyyyyyyyy more than close family members (she told me that later on!)! So natrually I was kinda ticked off about that. Had I known what it was going to be like... I would not have given so much.... I actually upped the gift due to the things she was telling me about the wedding. I felt bad that she was spending sooo much and I wanted to make sure she still got an adequate amount of money for it.
Personally, I like to gage the gift on who they are and how close the relationship is to me... AND where they are having it! It's not nice to feel taken advantage of like that.
I have a friend who actually calls you before the party to ask what the plate costs... because she ALWAYS wants to make sure she covers the plates and a little extra. Some people might find that rude... but she did it to me for the eparty and I didn't mind at all. I usually don't mind a lot of things.
Also, my mother has a friend who brings her checkbook with her and takes a look at the place and the food and then decides on the proper gift to give!
Personally.. if I was invited to a wedding at the KOC and it was someone who I was semi close to.... I wouldn't give as much to someone who booked the Oheka Castle with the same relationship status. Not to be mean... but in the end I am still giving the same gift... the percentage above what they paid for the plate. Does that make sense? They save money with KOC and so do I. (as an example, pp..if it were KOC and the plate was $50 I would give $100. It it were Oheka castle an the plate was $100 then i would give $150.) At every single occasion i go to though... I try not to give anything less than $200 if both FH and I go.

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Posted by FutureMrsM

I agree with the other girls... I don't base my gift on how much I think they spent on the wedding, I base it on my relationship with the couple.

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ITA

I thought traditionally you were supposed to give a give to cover your plate? So wouldn't the price of the wedding have a *little* bit of influence?

Not saying cheap out bc it's cheaper, but I would probably gauge it on that factor as well as my relationship with them.

As someone said, I'd give more for a gift for a wedding at Oheka as opposed to a fire hall or something.

can i invite all you girls to my wedding?

I base it on how close I am to the couple, and what other expenses I've had. For example, we went to a wedding in the Bahamas, GA, etc. Also, I don't think you should pay based on the place, b/c if I have this grand star million dollar wedding that is your choice, I am inviting you as a guest not to pay for your entry , and vice versa.
JMO

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Posted by megsher

I base it on how close I am to the couple, and what other expenses I've had. For example, we went to a wedding in the Bahamas, GA, etc. Also, I don't think you should pay based on the place, b/c if I have this grand star million dollar wedding that is your choice, I am inviting you as a guest not to pay for your entry , and vice versa.
JMO

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Thats what I do , it is YOUR choice where you want to have your wedding, why should I have to shell out the big bucks for your over the top tastes, IMO the gift I normally give is very gererous and would cover the cost of a most weddings. I don't think I would fault someone for getting married at a less expensive place. I do give less to my cousins who live in Middleofnowhere, SC becasue I don't want them to feel like they have to match the standard LIW gift. I don't give them less becasue their wedding isnt as fancy.