XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Hi Ladies!
Hoping you can help me out here with a question I have. I am under my minimum by 20 people at my reception hall. I fully understand that I signed a contract and am liable for the full amount of people. I am not asking the hall to eat the money I signed on for. However, being 20 people under I really feel the owner is not working at all with me here. We are talking about a significant amount of money being spent for nothing. I asked for upgrades..not the full amount of money I am spending on 20 people but something that wouldn't make me feel like I am throwing a lot of money away. I was offered less than a $300 upgrade. I then said that if they couldn't work with me a bit more I would just wrap up the 20 dinners I am paying for and will take them home with me. The owner said I am not allowed to do that because ' it is against New York State health codes to send home the extra dinners with you.' My question is...does that sound right? I am paying for 20 extra people...including their dinners...and I can not take them home with me? Am I being unreasonable here? Again, I understand I committed to a number but to then tell me I can not take home the meals I am paying for and only offering $300 in upgrades? So it really is just throwing money away. The owner then said that i was given stuff when I signed...but every hall I looked at was willing to 'give me stuff' if I signed a contract with them.
I have seen many brides on here say they were able to wrap the number of dinners that were under their minimum to take home with them.
I won't say where I am getting married...in hopes that we can find some kind of solution...but I am pretty upset with this situation.
I will say though I may have the best banquet manager in creation. She is really trying to help me out here and I am super lucky I have her. But I am not feeling this owner right now...he is a bit unreal to me!
Do you ladies think I am being unreasonable?
MikeandJess
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Actually I asked my hall about this before I booked and they gave me the same answer as they gave you, I thought it was strange because I know some halls do let you take home the meals. I don't think you're being unreasonable, I would ask for a few extra things as well but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if they didn't do it.
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by MikeandJess
Actually I asked my hall about this before I booked and they gave me the same answer as they gave you, I thought it was strange because I know some halls do let you take home the meals. I don't think you're being unreasonable, I would ask for a few extra things as well but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if they didn't do it.
Thank you! yeah I guess I am a bit naive. I don't expect something for nothing but I just can't imagine I can't be worked with here.
HeatherRose
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Westbury manor gives you every signle dinner you pay for including for no shows.. there was a girl who got married on here and had the same problem, she was getting married at WM and they didn't give them to her that night, but a week later she went back and picked up the food, so I don't know what NYS says.. cause other halls are doing it.. good luck!!
Goldi1021
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
I think if you are getting married in a state park, like at Carlyle or Carltun, they cannot, by state law, send the meals home. If you are getting on private property, that may be a different story. We took all of our extra food home, but a friend of ours who got married at Carlyle could not.
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by Goldi1021
I think if you are getting married in a state park, like at Carlyle or Carltun, they cannot, by state law, send the meals home. If you are getting on private property, that may be a different story. We took all of our extra food home, but a friend of ours who got married at Carlyle could not.
Thank you so much for this info. I am getting married on private property so I appreciate you posting this!
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by HeatherRose
Westbury manor gives you every signle dinner you pay for including for no shows.. there was a girl who got married on here and had the same problem, she was getting married at WM and they didn't give them to her that night, but a week later she went back and picked up the food, so I don't know what NYS says.. cause other halls are doing it.. good luck!!
Thank you! I should have got married at the WM!!
KSquared
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
It is a law that they cannot give you food to take home, I think a lot of halls just kinda ignore because really, who is gonna turn them in?? But that is usually just one or two plates that they give.
I think what it all comes down is that even though it's a special day, we're still dealing with businesses and their main goal is money - which s u cks, but thats just how it is.
kellybean
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
our hall offers all the left over meals....
ant n tilde
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
my cousin got about ten means to take home from the carltun - not sure what hte rule is though.
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Ladies....thank you so much for all of your responses...I was really getting upset about this...and then I thought maybe I was the unreasonable one in this whole situation! Thank you again!!
iwannabmrsD
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
if they wont let u take the food home tell them u want the bridal party to be offered seconds.. that should handle it..
then tell the bridal party to stick soe tupperware in their purses and fill them up before thy leave~!~
okay maybe not the second part but definetly the first!!
good luck!
little34
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
I would think that you would be able to take the meals home with you but it seems like he may be right... this happened to my friend and they just invited neighbors and some friends that they weren't originally going to ask to come and not bring a gift since it was short notice. You could do something like that... good luck!!!
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by iwannabmrsD
if they wont let u take the food home tell them u want the bridal party to be offered seconds.. that should handle it..
then tell the bridal party to stick soe tupperware in their purses and fill them up before thy leave~!~
okay maybe not the second part but definetly the first!!
good luck!
LOVE IT!! That is great!!!!! Thank you for the laugh!
BoxOfRocks
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Here's a long shot--maybe you could donate the meals to a homeless or women's shelter and take a tax deduction. Not sure how you would work the transportation. You might have to rely on the hall and reduce your deduction for a transport fee. Conversely, you could pay a transport fee and take a higher deduction. I hate to make it more difficult for you, but you may want to check with the health department (b/c the meals are going off site) and an accountant on that.
Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Thank you ladies for all of your advice!!
emcheung
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
yeah, i guess you can offer people a double meal. i'm sure someone will enjoy it.
Mici n KC
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by iwannabmrsD
if they wont let u take the food home tell them u want the bridal party to be offered seconds.. that should handle it..
then tell the bridal party to stick soe tupperware in their purses and fill them up before thy leave~!~
okay maybe not the second part but definetly the first!!
good luck!
Great idea!!! Believe me, if I was in this situation and the food was to die for, I would be doing this too!
missK
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by emcheung
yeah, i guess you can offer people a double meal. i'm sure someone will enjoy it.
My MOH wedding the extra food that would have nbeen plated was walked around and the guests were asked if they wanted seconds or thirds!!! it was very nice
iwannabmrsD
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Re: XP: Am I being unreasonable? A little upset with my reception hall and could use some advice
Posted by MalteseMommy
Posted by iwannabmrsD
if they wont let u take the food home tell them u want the bridal party to be offered seconds.. that should handle it..
then tell the bridal party to stick soe tupperware in their purses and fill them up before thy leave~!~
okay maybe not the second part but definetly the first!!
good luck!
i do what i can!! lol. bottom line.. dont stress it.. and seriously.. someone's grandma can carry soem tupperware in their bag.. u know granny's had those supersized pockets books way back before they were fashionable!! LOVE IT!! That is great!!!!! Thank you for the laugh!
