curious, do you REALLY think that its truly yours and fh's wedding and no one else's?
i know there are certain things that we control, venue, church, my dress, etc..but i know that my fmil wants us to invite people that we don't like and therefore don't want at our wedding - they blackmailed us into inviting these people to our e-party, don't get me started.
regardless of who is paying, do you feel like your day is truly your own?
Jen2999
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Re: your day - your way????
So far everything is all me (and some FH ahhaahhaa) and I am thankful of that.
thefirstlady
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Re: your day - your way????
Ultimatly (sp) yes, YOU wear the white dress, SAY the vows, CUT the cake, it's yours baby! My FMIL is paying for her old-*** friends, but they are paying for my first house if they attend. Sounds wrong, but I'm not twisting anyone's arm to come, am I?!!!
BKtoLI
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Re: your day - your way????
Hell freaking yes!!!
We're paying for this ourselves, so unless you're making a generous contribution, you have no say, I'm sorry!!!
My mom wanted to invite some extra people, and I had to remind her every extra person was another $100 and that it made no sense for us to pay for people we haven't seen in over a year. That's when she stopped singing that tune.
sarahthegreat
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Re: your day - your way????
ok, my fmil likes to talk - and ps - we need a hand flapping like its talking emoticon. she likes to tell me they are 'helping us' i've heard it soooo many times....so i'm not really holding my breath.
she likes to talk and has told me on several different occasions i should have my fh's cousins wife as one of MY bm's. hell no!! i mean, i love both of them, but i'm not about to have this person in my bridal party.
so, i know that i have my say, but to hear this bs makes me wonder..
mclane
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Re: your day - your way????
*sigh* I wish.
My guest list is the real problem-everything else is pretty much the way I want it.
Goldi1021
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Re: your day - your way????
Nod, smile and say 'Its something to consider' and they are SOMETIMES appeased. My mom should have plenty of say. Shes paying. FMIL has to take a back seat and I dont think she is thrilled.
sarahthegreat
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Re: your day - your way????
i hear ya leslie, but i get sooooo tired of hearing the same crap. especially when i've already told her no on the bm thing, several times. chris told her that having her in the wedding, is never going to happen and to stop bringing it up. i'm just waiting b/c i know she will
FrogGirl0917
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Re: your day - your way????
i'm lucky....my mom lets me know her opinion, but always ends the sentance with 'but its your wedding....you do what you want'. She rocks. The only thing I had no say on was that her one friend comes, but she refuses to let me pay for her. Thanks mom!!
Tracy06
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Re: your day - your way????
its all about me and my fiance
October Bliss
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Re: your day - your way????
In the very beginning, no, now, hell yea!! And it was my own fault in the very beginning that it wasn't all about us. I kept trying to solicit my mom's opinion, but she kept saying, it is my wedding and it is for me to decide. Took me a while to get over wanting the approval, but I'm there now.
Now the only opinions that count besides FH are the LIW girls!
waterspout4
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Re: your day - your way????
We are paying for it ourselves, so it's OUR day. If family was paying, then they could have some say to the guest list.
kissy27
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Re: your day - your way????
FH & I are paying for the entire wedding so it is OUR day & no one else has a say in anything...Luckily both of our families have been great & have kept their opinions to themselves
july06bride
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Re: your day - your way????
its our wedding and should primarily be our way- however depsite who is paying or not,it is my parents and his parents day too- They too have looked forward to this day since i was little, they have saved their hard earned money to provide me with a big wedding with many of their family members who i never met and they friends... Its their day too BUT should be OUR WAY... does that makes sense!
kellwolfe
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Re: your day - your way????
Yes it is even with the list we made it and told her what address we needed ....
psf80
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Re: your day - your way????
Yes and no. FH and I are definitely the ones choosing our vendors and flowers BUT our parents' opinions are definitely in the back of my mind. Whether I want them to or not, their opinions and likes and dislikes definitely influence me in my selections.
cindyandkevin
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Re: your day - your way????
It's very much our say!! I'm not really getting a lot of outside opinions which is good since we're paying for it ourselves. My mom has been helping out a lot and so sometimes I'm afraid she's getting 'too involved'. That's when I decide to take a break from planning and we do a 'time out' to get back on track.
Preshy7
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Re: your day - your way????
SINCE OUR FAMILIES HAVE BEEN VERY GENEROUS- THEY HAVE A BIG SAY
MY MOM AND I USUSALLY SEE EYE TO EYE ON IDEAS AND IF SHE DOESNT LIKE SOMETHING I USUALLY DONT EITHER
SO FOR THE MOST PART , ITS EVERYONES AGREEMENT BUT ME AND FH IDEAS
