Holidays - Where to go?

I know it's only August, but has anyone started thinking about (or in my case, worrying about) what to do about the holidays? My family does not live on LI, but DH's does. We can't go to both sets of parents each holiday, and I am worried that since this is the first holiday we are married, our families are going to fight over us.

Even if we decide to split them, I think my parents will be upset if I don't spend Thanksgiving with them ('You're spending your first married holiday with your in-laws instead of us?'), but if we do Thanksgiving with them, and Christmas with the in-laws, my parents will still be upset ('You're spending your first married Christmas with your in-laws instead of us?')

Any advice?

Re: Holidays - Where to go?

The best thing you can do is divide up the holidays. How far are your parents? Maybe you can do Thanksgiving with them and the day after with your inlaws and Christmas Eve with your parents and Christmas Day with your in laws. (if they are driving distance but not enough to do in a day). Does that work at all? We split up our holidays but it's easier because we always had different traditions anyway and I'm Jewish too (my dad's Catholic thought) so I have more holidays. We split things up like this...

New Years Eve - alternate my parents and his parents

New Years Day - usually his parents but I'll go to the movies with my dad if he wants while DH watches the Winter Classic

Passover - my parents

Palm Sunday - his parents

Easter - my parents

Mother's Day - breakfast with his parents, rest of the day with my parents

Father's Day - breakfast with my parents, rest of the day with his parents

Memorial Day/4th of July - his parents but my parents come for the BBQ

Labor Day - our anniversary weekend...so prob just the 2 of us

Rosh Hashanna - my parents

Yom Kippur - my parents

Thanksgiving Eve - we stay home

Thanksgiving Day - my family until the first quarter of the football game is over, then over to his parents for the rest of the day (I got black friday shopping with his aunt)

Day after Thanksgiving - SHOPPING!!!!!

Christmas Eve - His parents

Christmas Day - my parents

Re: Holidays - Where to go?

can you have ppl over your house?

Re: Holidays - Where to go?

We have it pretty easy. His dad lives I'm Florida so no holidays with him. My parents live in Alaska so if we go there, (which we haven't for a holiday yet) we know way in advance and plan accordingly. Since every holiday is spent with his mother we can pretty much go away and miss any holiday we want. Only thing that bugs me is Thanksgiving! His family doesn't really celebrate so idiot want a true Thanksgiving I have to do it!!!

Re: Holidays - Where to go?

Set expectations early....

DH and I alternate, and we have 3 families to go between: his dad and stepmom, his mom, and my parents.

Last year, we did Thanksgiving w/ his dad's, Christmas eve with his Dad, Christmas day with his mom and my parents the day after. **His mom has dibs on the Sunday before Thanksgiving for 'her' T-giving.

This year, we are doing Thanksgiving with my parents, Christmas eve with my family and Christmas day with his dad's family. We'll see his mom another time.

It will continue to rotate, so some years people get a turn, other years people don't - BUT my mom was SO patient with the fact that we weren't going to see her for our first married Christmas... HUGE brownie points for me and DH... in our minds, she can get whatever she wants in the future