~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

Today's question is an introspective question.

When do you think your most formative years were:

a. high school
b. college
c. grad school
d. when you first entered the working world

or was it a life experience?

a. becoming a mom
b. getting married
c. a bad break up
d. other

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

I think for me it's a combination of a lot of those. I learned a lot about myself in college and the very beginning of grad school. I had a lot of personal issues I had to deal with, and then I had a really bad breakup. And I think once I came through all that, I had my head straightened out and it just happened to be right around the time I met DH. Now I'd say I'm pretty happy with who I am, but I expect I'll still be learning a lot and growing since I still have so much left of life to experience.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

I try very hard to live in the moment and enjoy life right now.

When I was in college, I took a class on the education system and our prof played us 'Glory Days' by Bruce Springsteen and handed out the lyrics. No matter how many times I'd heard that song before, I hadn't realized how it idolized high school and basically said that no time of his life was going to be as great as those glory days then. To me, it sounds like Al Bundy (from Married With Children), always talking about the one amazing pass at the h.s. football game that becomes a more distant memory every year... that's no way to live!

When I think back, I'm amazed at how I've changed but it's still me (if that makes any sense). I used to do this thing when I got really, really scared when I was in h.s. where I'd close my eyes for a second and repeat in my head 'flash forward! flash forward!' to encourage myself to remember that moment of sheer distraught and know that someday I'd be looking back at it with a calm demeanor, meaning I'd gotten through whatever the stress was. I remember doing it before big auditions, mainly. Now, I can distinctly remember those moments, somehow better than many others, and I feel smart for calming myself down knowing 'this too shall pass' but sad that I wanted to skip ahead in moments of my life. I try never to do that anymore. Instead I relish experiences, even the most uncomfortable and awkward ones. Life is so short.

To answer your question (btw: I'm totally blaming the pregnancy for my verbiage... I cannot shut up these days!!!), it's who I am now. Ever since I met DH 5 years ago, I started a new job, then left it and moved to another state. We're awaiting our first child and I still think being a wife or at least a life partner to DH has formed me into who I am and who I love about myself. I'm not happy all the time, but my quality of life has improved so much since I stepped back and calmed down. I couldn't have done all that without knowing him. I didn't even know I needed to do that!

My past definitely helped form me but it's my present that defines me.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

i think for me it was entering the working world. it kinda forced me to be an adult and become responsible... now you had to get up to go to work every day, etc...

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

I'd say highschool/college. I never really had a hard time with anything in grade school- I never had to study and still got good grades, I hardly ever did my HW but my teachers still liked me, basically I skated by. I did the same in highschool but started acting out more and just not giving a crap! I wasn't a bad kid, but I smoked and had a lot of b/fs and stayed out past curfew. In my junior year, all the girls had to do mandatory volunteer service which IMHO is an oxymoron. 'Mandatory volunteer', but I digress. We had to do 40 hours. I was a teacher's assistant in a Sunday school class. The particular class I had were 2nd graders who would be receiving their Communion. Because of this, their classes ended earlier than the others and I didn't meet my required 40 hours- I think I had about 35 or 36. Well, they wouldn't give me the credit. They told me I had to do 80 hours over the summer or I could consider myself expelled. I brushed it off thinking 'Yeah, right.' and showed up to school the first day of my senior year only to be told I couldn't be there. It was a slap in the face. I still feel like i was treated unfairly, but this was first taste of the real world and how they do not care for extenuating circumstances. It left quite an impression on me- now I OVERDO everything rather than doing the bare minimum.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

college. met so many great people and it totally broadened my perspectives on things.

even though there are parts of the college that i complained about....i would not be where i am today if i did not go to that school and meet the people i met

plus, i probably wouldnt know DH. we met at an alumni mixer (he went to same school, different campus)

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

Def college.

I have the best friends from college, learned sooo much, used to run a student club/ started a dance troupe, and met my hubbs bc of one of my college friends.

It was awesome and I had a lot of fun and was very involved those four years even though I was a commuter and lived at home.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

i was going to college while going to work, so i would say both!

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

I chose other. I would have to say my most formative years were Junior High into high school. My mom had just left my family and me and my sisters and brother were all still pretty young. We all kind of stuck together even though it was rough to get used to and I learned a lot of responsibility pretty quickly. It made me realize who my family and friends really were and it also made me into the person I am today

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

Entering the working world, definatly! And wedding planning.

HS and college was all childish drama. I was way over it before it even started! So glad to be a grown up now!

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

College....made amazing friends and learned so much (not just schoolwise).

Then entering into the working world....it sorta gave me a perspective of what I want/don't want. I have been realizing that what I went to college/grad school for isnt what i really want to do....so I am not trying to figure out what I do want to do with my life.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

Definitely college. I went away, without DH, without family, without my friends. I was all alone in the big city of Boston. It was the first time I got rejected from a dance team, and it was also then I had to learn to cook, do laundry, clean, etc. I learned so much more than the standard academics during my 4 years there. And the friends I made there are incomparable to some of the 'friends' I had in high school. I think it also told me a lot about my and DH's relationship. I went to Boston for 4 years, he stayed here in NY, and we never broke up. I knew once that time was over that if we could withstand that, we could withstand anything.

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

I loved my college years! Oh to be on that schedule again!

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

high school!!!

it was before my mom got sick..i had great friends..who i am still close with to this day..before i toremy acl and was able to run lol..i was 125 pounds..went from vollyball to basketball to softball..plus i still had dh..we went to hs together ...love those years before stress got in the way with life

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

It was between college/grad school. I was always more mature than people my age to begin with because I've had to grow up faster than most of my friends and be more independent. My last year of college is when my dad died and that's when I had to step it up even more and be more responsible for things at home, and take care of things that my brother & sister wouldn't do. I also had to finally make the decision to end an unhealthy relationship with my on/off bf of 6 years-best decision of my life.

I definitely feel that all things happen for a reason and has helped me become me

Re: ~**Wednesdays NWQOTD**~

It's so hard to just pick one moment.

The biggest turning point in my life was when I moved out of my house into my first apartment. I didn't want a roommate and it was the first time I was ever totally by myself. I grew up so much. It was the first time I was ever really responsible about money, had to pay rent, clean up after the parties, etc.