Not introducing parents into reception hall

I need some help- I have a very large bridal party (8 girls, 7 guys plus the kids), my parents are divorced both remarried (I HATE my mother's husband , love my stepmom), FH's parents are divorced only a few years and are only on 'okay' terms. I do not want to do introduction into the reception- just 'And now for their first dance please welcome our hosts Michele and Scott'...
Although my mom's husband is invited, he is not being treated as a parent in any way- no tux, no bot, nothing. He WILL NOT be introduced with her so she asked me NOT to do introductions. My FH's parents will never walk in together, and why should they- they are divorced. But they have the same last name still and I think it will be incrediable weird to intro them seperate. To make a long story short my stepmother is very insulted that I am not doing intros since all of her friend's are introduces into their kid's weddings. She has already told my sister what words she wants used for her intro and that she is 'devastated' that I plan on skipping them all together. I feel this is a bit overdramactic.
Am I being unfair not doing the intros? I need some back up here.

I think you are making perfect sense! First, there is no 'right way' to do introductions. Second, you are taking responsibility for how you feel about your relationships and are being 'true' to yourself. That is very important. Third, you put nobody in a potentially uncomfortable situation and have considered the feelings of others as well. If you decide on doing introductions of your Bridal Party only, that is fine too! I've done this for many similar situations. Stick with your plan and hopefully all will understand. If not, question the sincerity of the relationship that comes into question.

Regards,

Michael

Dear Michelle,
Without a doubt the best thing you can do is not introduce the parents. There is no way you are going to please everyone and it will only cause problems at the wedding if you do the introductions of the parents. I recently played a wedding where the bride had a similar situation. She decided to introduce the parents (against my advise) and it turned out to be a nightmare.
When I was lining up the bridal party the parents (all divorced and with new mates, dates etc) got into a heated shouting argument- very ugly. When I introduced the bride's mother and escort -she never came into the room-she walked out. During the reception there was constant bickering between the parents. You do not need this on your wedding day. In the seminars I give to bridal consultants this is one of the topics I cover. There is no
single 'right' way to introduce a bridal party. The 'best' way is to eliminate any conflict. This is your wedding- not the parent's wedding. Let the parents know that you are only introducing the bride's maids and ushers and that the topic is not open to discussion. Stopping the problem now will save you a tremendous amount of grief at the reception -as well as leading up to the reception. The parents may not be happy with your decision but they will have time to get used to it. Do not give in to the pressures they will put on you. I wish you and your future husband the best. Remember - you are not alone in this situation. There are many brides who have gone through the same thing. The brides that gave in to the parents were always sorry they did. Also make sure you separate the parents when you do the seating arrangements.
STAN WIEST
A.STAN WIEST MUSIC
Member Association Of Bridal Consultants Stan Wiest Website Stan Wiest Email

Ditto!

What you want to do is the nicest no matter what! Just introducing yourselves with first names is really classy (and stays far away from that 'and now for the first time Mr. + Mrs. John Smith' which makes me cringe every time I hear it.)

Remember that it's YOUR wedding. You ARE the most important person (I doubt if the groom would be doing the big wedding if you didn't want to) and your wishes should simply be honored no matter what.

Good luck! and set it up so that YOU have a great day (as everyone involved should be working to bring about.)

Dear Michelle,
Mark brought up a good point and I would like to continue on it . I just returned from playing for a wedding that the bride and groom wanted to be introduced as 'Please welcome your hosts for the afternoon Mr and Mrs----------.Another bride I will be playing for does not want any introductions because of family problems-I will announce the first dance for all the guests and the bride and groom will join in when half the dance floor is filled.Anything that makes you feel uncomfortable now- magnify that tenfold on your wedding day. Take the time and look at every aspect of the wedding reception-every formality-ceremony etc.
You can change anything-nothing has to be done that will cause you the slightest stress or anxiety. Do not follow the so called 'rules of weddings' that are in so many wedding planning books.They do not work in real life.If you need
some suggestions -please feel free to call me at my office (631) 754-0594. Just mention your post on liweddings.If you get my answering machine(this means I am in a meeting with a client) leave a message and your phone number and I will get right back to you. I will be happy to make suggestions of areas to look into to alleviate the stress. No obligation- I can feel your pain in your post and I will be happy to try to help if I can. This is what I teach bridal consultants. You sound very stressed in your post - and there is no reason for you to put up with that type of pressure. I am a firm believer a bride should have everything she wants- never settle for anything -and your wedding day should be magical and totally stress and worry free.
Again- this is your wedding. You should do what you feel is best for you and your future husband.
STAN WIEST
A.STAN WIEST MUSIC
Member Associatin Of Bridal Consultants Stan Wiest website Stan Wiest Email