A moment of really weird and surpising enlightenment

Ok so like many of you girls, my weights skyrocketed the last few months.

Surpisngly though....I amnot mad-more resigned...(amazing how therapeautic hurlign a scale out the window can be...)

Yes I'm a little pised that my metabolism is slowing down and I cant eat donuts everyday anymore lol. I havent been to the gym in like 3 months now? because of my neck injury but with PT I am getting better so hope to go back eventually.

I got lazy and started eating junk but Im one of those women who is very thin on her upper half and is bottom heavy. But I didnt look bad I thought-yea I had a pooch belly that I cant suck in anymore and my thighs are twin hamhocks but they always look like that.

But last night I tried to get on a pair of jeans I left at my mom's house from a year and a half ago and MY GOD! The suckers didn't go up ONE LEG! I was like HOW did I EVER fit into those??? They look like doll pants.

So initially I was really upset but then i thought about it and strangely enough thought about the book EAT PRAY LOVE that I am finishing and it made me reassess.

I'm feeling ok...I intend to start excercising again but God I think is intervening and keeping me sane because I am pretty accepting that this is just my 'woman' body and I am a grownup now and moving to new chapters of my life. LIke DH said, he met me when I was a girl (Iw as barely 22) and yes I was hot but he prefers ym body now because its the woman he married-strong and femminine. (YES he is getting some for that! )

I just wanted to share that because I struggled for YEARS with my weight-was anorexic and bulemic for a long time and always was on the thinner sie of my 'ideal' weight. So I thought I'd lose it now that I am about 15 pounds heavier than I have ever been before, but Im ok. I think once I start going to the gym I will feel more comfortable with the fact my body is just changing and I am coming into my own physically just as I am mentally and emotionally...

Read that book!


I will never be a size 2 again but a trim, in shape 6 is ok too.

i hear ya sister

although i didn't battle the same things you did, i went from a size 2 after HS to a size 8/10 after college. everyone that knew me from my childhood said i was so FAT! it drove me crazy, but everyone else that had just met me said i was insane for wanting to lose weight.

you get used to it and it's comforting when you accept it - this is your 'woman' body, like you said it!

p.s. what's this new book about?

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Posted by bonitachyc
p.s. what's this new book about?

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Yea I thought Id lose it but even today when i had to go shopping for bigger clothes i was really clam and comfortable with my lumps and bumps. usually I avoid looking in the mirror till Im dressed.

oh this book is called 'Eat Pray, Love'. Its on the bestseller list. Its soooo good. I have been laughing aloud. I really relate in mnay ways to the author-its a memoir. You know I likw to write and the way she writes is similar to how I do-the humor she inflects the book with.

I really love her conversations with God-it seems a little wacky at first but made sense to me. I think you'd love it. I just started and am already mostly through and to think I avoided it at first ebcause it go so much hype I was leery/

Good for you!!! Im unhappy with my body lately and realize I dont think I am fat- I just am not in shape like I used to be. I use to have some tone and now I just dont. Although I tried on some pants today that fit me a year ago and I couldnt button them! But I figure if I can get in shape and feel good, then thats good enough!

I've been wanting to read that book. Unfortunately for me, I've had my 'woman' body for too long and there's just too much to it The way I'm built, I could NEVER be a size 2 even if I starved myself - my physical structure is just not as small as some other women. But that's FINE with me - I grew up in a family where bone skinny was NOT applauded and having curves was. The thing is - I have TOO many curves!

I'd be ecstatic to be where I was about 2-3 years ago. Just need to get physically better so I can start working out again and also need to start eating healthier on a more regular basis.

I think it's great when a person loves the way they look and makes no apologies for it, so you go ladies!

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Posted by GinaZ

Good for you!!! Im unhappy with my body lately and realize I dont think I am fat- I just am not in shape like I used to be. I use to have some tone and now I just dont. Although I tried on some pants today that fit me a year ago and I couldnt button them! But I figure if I can get in shape and feel good, then thats good enough!

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Thats how I feel Gina. Im not trying to get down into teh super low digits anymore. I just want to feel happy and toned and surprisingly now that I am 'fatter' and eating more of what I want to without guilt, I am so much happier. Amazing whata donut can dofor a girl!

I loved that book !
It is so uplifting, almost spiritual.

I resigned my self a long time ago that I will never be skinny. I am just a big framed girl. I can stand to lose some weight, my knees will be better for it.
I may be big, but I'm healthy. Good cholesterol, low blood pressure, sugar levels where they should be.

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Posted by SusiBtoM

I loved that book !
It is so uplifting, almost spiritual.

I resigned my self a long time ago that I will never be skinny. I am just a big framed girl. I can stand to lose some weight, my knees will be better for it.
I may be big, but I'm healthy. Good cholesterol, low blood pressure, sugar levels where they should be.

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susi when I get my lisence gonna go kidnap you-we'll walk around the park a few laps. I started doing pilates again last nigth-forgot how tough it can be

Good for you Jenn!!!! I came to the realization a couple of months ago that I'm NOT 'dieting' anymore!! I'm going to eat the best I can (which is actually pretty good) and I'm not going to starve myself or feel guilty over the Doritos I ate last night!

It was difficult for me b/c I always had what people considered a 'nice' body w/ minimal working out. Even after having my 2nd child and gaining 60 lbs.- I snapped back. But now after 3 children and turning 35, I have to work at it and it Suuuccckkkkkksssss!!!!
I do work out but I'm not obsessive about it, if I can't wear certain things like before- oh well!!

I guess it's a matter of being happy with who you are, yes, you still have to be healthy- but you don't have to be a size 2!!

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Posted by SylvieB

Good for you Jenn!!!! I came to the realization a couple of months ago that I'm NOT 'dieting' anymore!! I'm going to eat the best I can (which is actually pretty good) and I'm not going to starve myself or feel guilty over the Doritos I ate last night!

It was difficult for me b/c I always had what people considered a 'nice' body w/ minimal working out. Even after having my 2nd child and gaining 60 lbs.- I snapped back. But now after 3 children and turning 35, I have to work at it and it Suuuccckkkkkksssss!!!!
I do work out but I'm not obsessive about it, if I can't wear certain things like before- oh well!!

I guess it's a matter of being happy with who you are, yes, you still have to be healthy- but you don't have to be a size 2!!

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EXACTLY Sylvie!

I never had to work out and though Im still slim its not that concave belly model slim I had going on before without working at it ever. But now I NEED to work so its frustratign but it doesnt deter me from my ice cream anymore.

LOL the other day I stood in front of my full length mirror, wearing my summer bikini and looking defiantly at ,y reflection while eating icecream. i was like 'Hmm I got some junk in my trunk. DAYUM.' Then I went and finished my ice cream.

And 3 kids??? SHEESH girl let me look like you after one let alone three!

good for you jenn!!!

i just may need to read that book. since moving in w/ DH, i've gained 15 lbs from my lowest weight.
<------- see hot pic here

now a lot of my clothes either don't fit or are way too snug, and i refuse to buy new clothes. i've been beating myself up really bad about it, but DH has been great. i just worked so hard to get down to the weight i was a year and a half ago, and to see it slip away is very frustrating. even 15 lbs ago i was not skinny, but i was happy w/ my body for the first time in my life. i just need to find the motivation to get there again.

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Posted by PeteysBride

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Posted by SusiBtoM

I loved that book !
It is so uplifting, almost spiritual.

I resigned my self a long time ago that I will never be skinny. I am just a big framed girl. I can stand to lose some weight, my knees will be better for it.
I may be big, but I'm healthy. Good cholesterol, low blood pressure, sugar levels where they should be.

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susi when I get my lisence gonna go kidnap you-we'll walk around the park a few laps. I started doing pilates again last nigth-forgot how tough it can be

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Kidnap me and we can go walk in Little Neck Park - it's next to the Cross Island Parkway right on the water. Gorgeous views.

I already told DH that we are going to start taking walks around the block after dinner instead of watching TV or him playing on the computer. I'll go by myself - I walk faster than he does anyway.

First I have to see an orthopod about my knee. I re-injured it last week while putting away groceries in the fridge. Bent down and next thing I knew I was on the floor seeing stars.

I am totally with you on this one, Jenn!! I'm definitely not heavy but boy, am I out of shape. Not as bad as I was back in the day when all I had was 'liquid lunches'. But still I'm a little disappointed because for the last two years I really looked good. But I've been eating like there's no tomorrow for some reason. Just have to start eating healthier & start working out with DH.

I'm definitely going to ready that book!!

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Posted by teenigrrl

good for you jenn!!!

i just may need to read that book. since moving in w/ DH, i've gained 15 lbs from my lowest weight.
<------- see hot pic here

now a lot of my clothes either don't fit or are way too snug, and i refuse to buy new clothes. i've been beating myself up really bad about it, but DH has been great. i just worked so hard to get down to the weight i was a year and a half ago, and to see it slip away is very frustrating. even 15 lbs ago i was not skinny, but i was happy w/ my body for the first time in my life. i just need to find the motivation to get there again.

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YYou're beautiful Tina and you'll get there honey! Just need to get comfy in your own skin.

The books is great-its not about weight loss at all, more about finding yourself and learning to eb comfortable with it. It just struch a chord in me for some reason because I could insert myself into her shoes easily through her writing style.

Sign into Bookins.com. You can trade it from someone and then trade it again. LOVE that site!

Congrats!

That is my favorite book and I have been in the 'Italy' portion since the wedding. I just enjoy every morsel of food, every moment of sex and every second of happiness with no regrets. I call it eating like a ten year old - I ate what I wanted whenever I wanted and it was heavenly!

I am still in 'Italy' haven't quite made the transition to Yoga BUT I have slowed down with the eating. I am TRYING not to like my new body, but I have to say I kind of like it. I feel soft and feminine and loved!

I am holding on to the 'Italy' aspect though. I am going through a rough time right now and just had my first post wedding anxiety attack and you know what? I am NOT going to let ANYTHING destroy my happiness . . .

So I am plump and happy and just. . . blessed.

Sorry to highjack but that wanted to share my experience after reading that book!

jenn... i feel the same way right now. i've gained 14 lbs. since i got engaged and a few weeks ago i felt so fat and ugly that i honestly dreaded getting up and going to work and when i was finally at work, i couldnt wait to get home so that i could get into my pajamas again. recently i just realized that since i cant seem to lose it, i'm just gonna eat healthier and go for walks with dh at nights and hopefully just begin to feel better.
i may also have to invest some money in new clothes that actually fit

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Posted by ant n tilde

Congrats!

That is my favorite book and I have been in the 'Italy' portion since the wedding. I just enjoy every morsel of food, every moment of sex and every second of happiness with no regrets. I call it eating like a ten year old - I ate what I wanted whenever I wanted and it was heavenly!

I am still in 'Italy' haven't quite made the transition to Yoga BUT I have slowed down with the eating. I am TRYING not to like my new body, but I have to say I kind of like it. I feel soft and feminine and loved!

I am holding on to the 'Italy' aspect though. I am going through a rough time right now and just had my first post wedding anxiety attack and you know what? I am NOT going to let ANYTHING destroy my happiness . . .

So I am plump and happy and just. . . blessed.

Sorry to highjack but that wanted to share my experience after reading that book!

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ahhhh italy!! if only it could be like that here!!

I think it is so amazing that you are so comfortable with your body and where you are. This has always been a struggle for me. I have definitely gained some weight in the last year and with that some flab. Some of my clothes feel tight and that has been absolutely devastating for me. I am trying to work through it and it has been a struggle. I have started doing yoga and that has helped me to feel better about working out, but still not feeling great.

Long story short.... I find posts like yours inspirational so thanks!

Im so glad you posted this because I am still struggling accepting the fact that as hard as I try to loose weight I dont think I can accept my body for whatever reason the way it is ... No i can NEVER be a size 2 its just not the way my body was built....
My DH is VERY supportive- to a point where I dont think I could EVER handle myself if the roles were reversed!! HAHA

I am going to pick up the book tomorrow... hopefully this will lift my spirits somehow.... I have gained 7 lbs since the wedding and it really has put me down for quite some time so I hope this will help me!!!


Thank you!!!

PS You absolutely look beautiful the way you are now!