Please help... I need advice. I think it's time I break up with a friend and I am nervous and sad to do so but things have built up and I really don't want her husband in my life.
back story...
Dh and I met this couple a few years ago while cruising with BIL&SIL. They were a lot of fun and we spendt our days and nights drinking and partying with them. We went on excurisions and developed a friendship. We spoke to them often after that trip and we all visited a few times (they live in PA) all the while, mainly we would drink and the guys would hang out in their man caves and the ladies would chat. 6 months later we all went on a second cruise. This was the cruise which DH propsed. I want to add that this guy let's call him Bill... would always be the d ick friend would would make snide comments and be like 'Shauna, it's 11am can Matt drink now' because hello, my DH is a brain injury survivor and can't and shouldn't drink like any healthy guy... (oh and this other guy has about 100lbs on my DH) anyway you know the type of guy who behind your back is telling your DH how you are controlling... etc. yea, never liked that but learned to deal with it.
okay flash forward to wedding events....
our e-party... Bill asked to be in our BP while out to dinner the night before the party. I didn't want it but Dh was really put on the spot and said yea... it was incredibly awkward for everyone. We hadn't even known them a year... then the night of the party the both of them got so shi t faced and got in a huge fight. Causing SIL&BIL to have to drive them home. Oh and Bill will always hang with the person who will drink the most with him. Sadly this is my FIL..
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that's a whole other story though. So they get in this huge fight, she's crying. he's yelling.. it was a mess... There was an after party and she showed up he got himself back to ther hotel somehow but SIL & BIL had to leave early bc she wanted to go back to the hotel
She wasn't invited to my shower...
Bach-parties... they came. Girls went to Foxwoods, guys went to Mohegan Sun. She was so intoxicated by 9pm we had to put her to bed.. infact the stripper asked that we put her to bed bc she was such a mess and kinda messing up his... umm... 'act'.. so we did and then went out came home at 4am and she woke up saying when are we leaving... she thought she napped for 30 minutes. Now the guys.. yes they made the long trip from PA to go with us but as far as I heard Bill didn't offer up a dime for any of DH's festivities... he might have bought him a beer or 2 but when it came to food and the stay it was all BIL (his other guys didn't chip in either but again it's not about that)...
Rehearsal, they couldn't make it, it was theirkids 1st day of school
Wedding day.... Well they wanted to get together with us the night before. I said NO WAY! If DH wanted to go see them at his Dad's house with BIL then it was up to him but I wasn't I know they just wanted to party... Dh didn't and I'm really glad he passed.... okay wedding day, Bill showed up to my Dads where the guys met for pics and from the sounds of it just started drinking like crazy and complained the whole time about pics, his tux, everything.... Then the reception.. surprise, surprise they got wasted and who did Bill choose to go get the most drunk with, my FIL... I am so embarressed to even write this but Bill convinced my drunk FIL to go dunk their heads in the koi pond at JT... I am MORTIFIED that this happend! I didn't know the night of the wedding and those who knew tried to keep me from knowing but i found out.. I know people at JT (staff) and my parents threw us the wedding and this is the kind of people we had. I am really ashamed....
post wedding, there was a very big mix up with the hotel and the shuttles getting to LaQuinta and for some reason Bill and his wife were asked to go on another bus which took like an hour to get to JT... Ummm I was waiting there too and most of the other BP. Well guess who, walked to 7-11 for a case of beers... then with the chaos at LaQuinta regarding them giving their rooms away, Bill nearly gets in a fist fight with the bus driver. The bus driver got in MY FACE! and I told him to get out it's my wedding day what is he thinking, and Bill continued to try and fight him. Then his wife stumbles out of the hotel while her hubs is screaming at this man, asking where all the beer went and not even acknowledging what the Ef is going on... That's when I took the money box and my hubs hand and said we are going to bed.
DH did NOT get wasted at our wedding in fact I was told he was ignoring Bill most of the time bc he was being such an asss...
So, I haven't talked to them since and she called me last night to catch up. I heard she is preggers again and I'm happy for them and wish them well but really don't want them in my life anymore.. SIL feels somewhat the same way but we feel stuck. I really think if she asks me why I have been MI A I have to tell her the truth that, we have NOTHING in common. Other than going on cruises and throwing back one to many...
Help, what do I do... would you 'break up' with them too? Dh told me to do what I want. He is so non-confontational with friends though that I am sure he would still talk to bill once in a while, if Bill called him. He wouldn't keep initiate talking to him....
if you read this all thank you, I just really need some outside opinions on this...
