Been married 68 days

wow i couldnt believe my eyes...and what i was reading...i hope that you both can work this out somehow and i hope your husband realizes that he is being a jerk and extremely cruel! I know that when people are under severe stress they dont really think about their actions or their words.....this is absolutely no excuse ofcourse....but perhaps its one of those things.

Sending you both good wishes, happy thoughts, and lots of hugs

I can't believe he is acting so irrational.. Maybe it's the stress of his father being in ICU, but you have a 5 month old baby together.. and PS.. he can't just take her away from you.. That's crap... Stay strong and talk to him and see if you can meet on common ground.. Things will work themselves out.. we are here for you...

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

hugs

I don't know what to say to this....so

THe only thing that I can think of, not that this is an excuse, but he has had 3 of the 5 most stressful life events (marraige, family illness, new child....the others are death and job loss) happen in a relatively short period of time, and it has to be taking its toll on his mental state.

Again, this is no excuse for saying those horrible things, but do you think it could be that?

My mom died 3 years ago, and while she was sick, I said some really awful things to a lot of people. I still feel guilty to this day about it, and later apologized to them.....they realized that it wasn't 'me' saying those things....it was largely my mental state at the time. In hindsight....I cannot believe some of the horrible things I did and said....but at the time I was so angry and sad....it just came out. Its not an excuse, I know, but when people are under extreme stress (his Dad sounds very sick), they often say and do things that they wouldn't otherwise say.......

Only you know him well enough to know if this is for real.....but I wish you the best and send lots of
FM me if you need to talk.......

Thank you everyone. I made it through the night, barely. I pretty much cried all night.

He on the other hand, said'we had a bad day, let's just forget about it. I love you' But its not the first bad day and saying I love you doesn't fix it.. There have been a lot of bad days lately. And I cannot forget some of the AWFUL things he said yesterday which I can't even post out of embarrassment.

I asked him once again to go to a marriage counselor with me & he said no. His solution: he said I need prozac. Um no, I need you to be nice to me d!ckhead.

---

Posted by carolinebr

Thank you everyone. I made it through the night, barely. I pretty much cried all night.

He on the other hand, said'we had a bad day, let's just forget about it. I love you' But its not the first bad day and saying I love you doesn't fix it.. There have been a lot of bad days lately. And I cannot forget some of the AWFUL things he said yesterday which I can't even post out of embarrassment.

I asked him once again to go to a marriage counselor with me & he said no. His solution: he said I need prozac. Um no, I need you to be nice to me d!ckhead.

---

Had a bad day???? forget about it???? thats rediculous.
I'm so proud of you for not just putting this behind you and pretending it didnt happen. Sometimes its much easier to do that than fix the problem, but in the end it makes it worse. Its seems like you're really ready and willing to work hard on your relationship. Its a shame he's not though Counseling is so important. Keep working on him to get him to go to counseling with you....maybe he'll come around

---

Posted by carolinebr
I asked him once again to go to a marriage counselor with me & he said no. His solution: he said I need prozac. Um no, I need you to be nice to me d!ckhead.

---

Sounds like he's the one that needs the medication...and to learn how to be caring and supportive...if he won't go to counseling you could always go yourself. Just don't let him become an emotionally abusive husband..because that's almost what his behavior sounds like...just because it's not physical doesn't mean it doesn't harm you. Good luck and hope he steps up for you!!!!!

first

we all have been under stress. while his d ad was sick, i'm sure u were there for him. i hope it gets better for u. we're here for u sweetie

Wow, sounds like DH is the one who could use something stronger than prozac... Introduce him to some Tegretol or Depakote.

I just hope you do the right thing for you and your baby, thats all.
Good luck with everything, and get him some family therepy and some prozac, he needs to calm his asss..........down....

i'm so sorry to hear this! that is terrible how he is treating you.

honestly, you need to insist on counseling--both individual and marriage. and even though he says he is 'okay' now, you may want to talk to a lawyer to see what you would have to do if he goes nuts again. anyone who would threaten someone about taking her child is capable of many things. you should be prepared because who knows what he is thinking.

i wish you the best.

what?????? YOU need prozac???? he can't just tell you he wants a divorce and then act like nothing happened the next day! Doesn't he understand that you have feelings and that he can't just play with your emotions like that? I think counselling is necessary. But if he won't go with you, then you should try going by yourself at first. It might help just for you to have someone unbiased to talk to and give you advice. Then maybe after some time you could convince him to go with you. If you are important enough to him, then he should be willing to go with you. Good luck!!!

I am so sorry

1st I want to say that I am truly sorry that this is happening to you, no one deserves to be belittled or made to feel the way you feel.


2nd If he tells you that he only married you beause you got pregnant. and he truly means it, then take that as a que for you to start thinking differently. What do I mean? Any person that purposely tries to sabatoge what you two have (family, marriage) off a whim of feelings and is willing to hurt you, which in return is also hurting your daughter doesnt truely care about you.

3rd Everyone goes through emotional and turbulant times, it's called LIFE and everyone may not repsond to circumstances in the same matter, but that doesnt give him the right to emotionally hurt you because his father is ill.

I don't advocate you leaving because I wouldnt never tell another person what to do in their relationship. What I will do is give some advice. You have a daughter who is watching you two though all this, she may be small but dont underestimate how things that go on between you two can affect her. If he believes how he treats you is right and doesnt think counseling is needed, just look at your daughter and think would you want a man to treat her the way he is treating you?

---

Posted by carolinebr

Thank you everyone. I made it through the night, barely. I pretty much cried all night.

He on the other hand, said'we had a bad day, let's just forget about it. I love you' But its not the first bad day and saying I love you doesn't fix it.. There have been a lot of bad days lately. And I cannot forget some of the AWFUL things he said yesterday which I can't even post out of embarrassment.

I asked him once again to go to a marriage counselor with me & he said no. His solution: he said I need prozac. Um no, I need you to be nice to me d!ckhead.

---

I don't know hunny, this is a tough situation.
If he's not willing to work on your marriage by going to a conselor what does that tell you?
Sometimes men need a wake up call. If you packed your things and left with your daughter what do you think he would do? Would that give him the reality check he needs to wake up and see what he's doing to you? If he's treating you like crap and thinks he's not doing anything wrong there's a problem. Ask someone to baby sit for you and have a serious sit down with your husband. Tell him how you feel about the way things are going in your marriage. Try and talk things out by all means. If he still refuses, you need to think about what's best for you and your baby. Good luck I really hope you can work things out!
XOXOXO
Kitty

---

Posted by mskittynj

---

Posted by carolinebr

Thank you everyone. I made it through the night, barely. I pretty much cried all night.

He on the other hand, said'we had a bad day, let's just forget about it. I love you' But its not the first bad day and saying I love you doesn't fix it.. There have been a lot of bad days lately. And I cannot forget some of the AWFUL things he said yesterday which I can't even post out of embarrassment.

I asked him once again to go to a marriage counselor with me & he said no. His solution: he said I need prozac. Um no, I need you to be nice to me d!ckhead.

---

I don't know hunny, this is a tough situation.
If he's not willing to work on your marriage by going to a conselor what does that tell you?
Sometimes men need a wake up call. If you packed your things and left with your daughter what do you think he would do? Would that give him the reality check he needs to wake up and see what he's doing to you? If he's treating you like crap and thinks he's not doing anything wrong there's a problem. Ask someone to baby sit for you and have a serious sit down with your husband. Tell him how you feel about the way things are going in your marriage. Try and talk things out by all means. If he still refuses, you need to think about what's best for you and your baby. Good luck I really hope you can work things out!
XOXOXO
Kitty

---

I agree here with Kitty. If he is not willing to go to counseling with you then there is something wrong here. It's NOT you. Please have a sit down with him and espress to him how you feel in a calm manner and then if he answers you in a tone and says mean things.. you really might need to get away from him for awhile and clear your mind, figure out what the next step is. I know.. it's going to be a rough road. I don't like the way he is treating you and I don't know you, but I sincerely feel your pain and I hope and pray god gives you strength to do whatever it is that you need to do. We are all here if you need us.