Do you think your husband is too jealous?

Kathy116 Posted: Mar 07, 2004 03:04 AM

Do you think your husband is too jealous?

Mine is very jealous, but he keeps it inside...it's very rare that he voices this, it's almost like he knows that there's nothing to be jealous about, but that testosterone kicks in.

He'd never, ever make a scene, but he's admitted it to me that he is jealous.

It's just difficult for me to understand, because I'm SOOOOOOOO not the jealous type of person. He knows that we are crazy about each other, but he still gets this way.

At first I was angry, because I took it as him not trusting me...but I know he does.

Oh man...it's late and I'm rambling!
Thanks ladies for allowing the venting!

shamma Posted: Mar 07, 2004 07:11 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

Jealousy at times has nothing to do with the other mate, it has to do with the person and their own insecurities. In our earlier days of dating, me the confident non-jealous person was very jealous, there was no reason to be, but all of a sudden it just rose up, I guess it being so new and not feeling joined to my hubby, I think as we grew closer the more secure I felt.

anna Posted: Mar 07, 2004 07:23 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

When we first met, first of all, it was ME who initiated the conversation, it was ME who BLAH BLAH BLAH went up to him and yapped his ear off and totally picked him up of course, after our eyes met and I knew one of us better make a move
So the Non-shy one of us, got to it first

Well, that being said, my personality is that I am extremely friendly to all (OK, almost ALL ) and although that's what found me my long-eyelash adorable hubby , to HIM, thats what he thought was my way to hit on guys... When we first started dating, I think he was more cautious of HOW OVERLY friendly I was, how huggy-touchy-feely and bubbly and I was to the whole world.

A few times, I may have bumped into old friends from school, or from growing up, and I was as close as a sibling to some of them, and lets just say the hugs and kisses were too much for him to take Even though to me it was true, heartfelt and sincere 'we grew up together, I love them like brothers'
Maybe he saw it as me hitting on them, or them hitting on me, to me, even xchanging #s was harmless, I still dont 'get it'... and being that our personalities are SOOO different, I didnt see what I was doing wrong. I did nothing wrong..

But as I adjusted to his more private, more calm personality, I enjoyed and appreciated his company more and although I am still and will always be 'myself' I try not to trigger his silly over-reactive feelings...
does that make sense?

Maybe him being an only child, and not knowing how to share (I always joke with him about that ) maybe he just doesnt wanna share me with anyone?

christy Posted: Mar 07, 2004 07:51 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My husband has never once displayed jealousy. It actually used to make me mad when I was younger. (College years...cause if another guy showed interest he wouldnt at all be jealous). He has always been very secure. However, I had the jealousy issues when we were younger. I am over it now!

Sonicstef Posted: Mar 07, 2004 10:37 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My husband sort of is...but he doesnt have much opportunity for it to be a problem since he rarely sees me with other men except his friends or my brother. Unfortunetely, as soon as I started dating Luke all my male friends sort of faded away (i guess thats what happens when you date someone seriously???).

But I understand it b/c I am a little jealous. Not b/c I dont trust him but i know a lot of people who got themselves into a situation with a 'friend' and made a 'mistake' ... so im careful to keep a watch on those situations.

karen32 Posted: Mar 07, 2004 10:41 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

DH is a little bit. now that i am back in school, he always jokes 'make sure you keep that ring on, so the men know you are taken!' i don't really have any guy friends anymore, so that really isn't an issue.

Janice Posted: Mar 07, 2004 10:45 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

my DH is not jelous at all, and it use to make me mad too in our earlier yrs, but now I would not have it any other way

aliciahelene Posted: Mar 07, 2004 10:45 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My DH is the most laid back non jealous guy Ive ever met, sometimes I wish hed get a little jealous, but he is very secure iwth himself, as he should be!

Sunny Posted: Mar 07, 2004 11:20 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

DH used to be very jealous, to the point were all my guy friends were afraid- he would show up where I was like a lunatic- we were VERY young.

It is not like that anymore- we have both gotten over the jealousy thing.

MrsTC Posted: Mar 07, 2004 12:19 PM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

Posted by aliciahelene

My DH is the most laid back non jealous guy Ive ever met, sometimes I wish hed get a little jealous, but he is very secure iwth himself, as he should be!

LOL Alicia same here

He is hardly jealous of anything...although if I work late sometimes he will say (joking) 'Working late with your boyfriend again, huh?'

Diane Posted: Mar 07, 2004 01:50 PM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

mine is VERY jeaous, but he has gotten better.

nrvbrd Posted: Mar 07, 2004 03:31 PM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My Dh is not really the jealous type, and I also do not give him reason to be.

As with Stef, I am rarely around men that he does not know. Also I try not to have too many male friends. I think opposite sex friendships can be a little tricky, but that is a whole different topic.

As for me I am jealous when there is something to be jealous about or when provoked.

VickiC Posted: Mar 08, 2004 08:38 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

When we first starting dating he was jealous, which was due to an ex he had that used to make him jealous on purpose. So he naturally thought I would do the same thing - it took a while for him to realize that I wouldn't do that. Now he's really great and hardly is ever jealous, at least that I know of.

If anyone should be jealous, it should be me since my DH plays in a cover band and is front of the ladies all the time. Good thing I'm not really the jealous type and that I trust him completely.

Sage10.03 Posted: Mar 08, 2004 09:00 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My DH and I are (both) the most non-jealous people ever....
I still have guy friends that he has now become friends with and he has girl friends that I am now friends with.

Neither of us have ever been the 'jealous type', but then again, there is no reason to be.
We are both really secure people, in ourselves and in our marriage....feelings of jealousy have never been an issue.

Scoop Posted: Mar 08, 2004 10:39 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

My husband isn't jealous at all...in fact all my 'guy' friends hangout with him more than me now.

anna Posted: Mar 08, 2004 10:59 AM

Re: Do you think your husband is too jealous?

I dont think Id ever be able to tolerate the TRULY JEALOUS types that follow their gf's around, look in their wallets, etc.
I think anything carried that far is kinda drawing the line.
I think my hubby's 'jealousy' is kinda cute and harmless. He knows Id never and I know he'd never