My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

Before we got married my husband lived in an apartment on his own for nine years. I’ve known him for two and for the past 8 years he’s had this cat that he loves like a little sister and this may sound cruel but I am not fond of pets. However I couldn’t ask him to give up his because he has had it for so long and is attached to it immensely. She is basically a good cat and she actually doesn’t bother you and just sleeps all day long and she’s not jumping all over the furniture as I thought she would be because when she was living with him he never really disciplined her but now he knows he has some things to teach her and she is not allowed into certain rooms. She’s been pretty good about that and we do keep those doors closed when we are not home but if we are home and we have one of them open she sometimes attemps to come in and before she attemps to come in she looks at us and if she sees the don’t you dare look she does an about face and goes away. She doesn’t scratch or hiss at anyone like I said she will not bother you.

What is the problem then you might ask? Well at night she stands outside our bedroom door which is closed and cries for my husband. When they lived in the old apartment he had no doors to separate the rooms so everything was basically open and she was used to sleeping with him and now she is not allowed into any bedroom and it’s all new for her. But I can’t stand the crying because she does it throughout the night when we are trying to sleep. My husband gets up so many times to scold her and she goes away but then a little later she comes back and it is driving me crazy. I am not used to having pets if I had them growing up I’d be more understanding but I’m not fond of them so this is driving me nuts. I wake up pissed off and taking it out on my husband. He really is trying to discipline her, he does yell at her and scolds her but she keeps doing it. This has been going on for weeks. I thought she would be used to this new arrangement and sometimes I get so angry at my husband because of the way he spoiled her…He always jokes and says that this is good practice for when we have a baby and it cries during the night. A baby is different, it doesn’t get out of it’s crib and stand in front of your door. I’ll make the sacrifice for a baby but not for a pet…I’m just not fond of them.

Can anyone suggest anything??? I probably sound like a meanie

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

My cat has been driving me nuts in the same way lately - this is new. I mostly get her back by waking her up if I catch her sleeping during the day. Not the most mature, but I don't know what to do either.

She's not even locked out of the room, she just cries for no reason

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

I guess its not her fault if she was always able to go into the bedrooms before. Its probably hard to teach her that it is now Not ok. Maybe you can buy her a little cat bed or a little scratching post she can climb up on and sleep on. Our cats do like their little cat bed. Sometimes one cat will scratch at our bedroom door to get our attention but we try to ignore him. Eventually he stopped.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

She doesnt really scratch just claws. Her nails are not sharp. But the noise is annoying! followed by her crying. We try ignoring her and she doesn eventually stop but then she starts up again. It's like she takes a break...I dont know what else to do and it is starting to stress me out!

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

OH MY GOD!!!!!! Is your cat related to my BLACKIE???
He use to do this, until we used a squirt gun by the bed, and squirt him. Then he use to go under the bed and meow...
He stopped after that, now when he hears the gun shake he runs??
Is the cat an outside/indoor cat??

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

Basically your cat is lonely. She used to be able to sleep with your DH, or at least have access to him when he was sleeping. Now for the 8 hours you guys are shut up in your room sleeping, she's at a loss on what to do. 8 hours is a long time to be alone, esp at night for cats bc they are nocturnal animals, and she knows you are there but can't be near you.

One of our cats does the same thing. We usually just let her in, but we both are fond of cats, so it's okay.

Scolding will not help, she doesn't understand that she is doing anything wrong. You need to find something to occupy her at night. Does she go outside at all? Can you put her out for the night, where she will have interaction with other animals and with nature?

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

cats are nocturnal...so they are up in the middle of the night...


you could try to keep her awake during the day...

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

She's inside. Maybe I can try your method...LOL Or what I was thinking was our living room is in between the bedroom and the kitchen. She hangs out in the kitchen all the time that's her main spot which is fine so i was thinking of putting one of those child proof gates between the kitchen and living room (there is no door that separates the two) so that way it will block her way and she won't make her to the front of our bedroom door. Unless she hops the gate, which she will because these darn animals can jump sometimes and she is pretty strong for an old cat. She busting my chops because she knows i am not fond of her.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

have you thought about getting a kitten for her to play with??

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

Are you kidding me??? it's bad enough that she cries at night but the last thing I need is a kitten crying too. I'll loose my mind.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

that is what my parents did, and they both like to play together during the day. It settled theri problems. Just thought I might suggest

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

OMG Giovanna, IM dying laughing !!!

Sounds like this cat is very upset with hubby all of a sudden being a traitor LOL and all of a sudden having all these rules.

Im not a cat lover either, so I feel for you!
Ugh, this is a tough call !!!!

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

she'll jump over the gate. cats will do anything when they have their mind to it - very determined animals they are....

a friend would be nice, but i know you are not fond of the little ones.

hmm... i can't think of any reasonable compromise! i'm trying too!

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

I'm gonna try the water gun thing...LOL! I like that idea. And as immature as it sounds i'm gonna waker her up when she sleeps...LOL heh heh sweet revenge.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

You cannot expect a cat (remember these are NOT dogs) to just change the entire way she behaves- and that is what you want.
Would it really upset you that much to allow the cat to sleep on the bed? I mean, chances are she will get up during the night anyway. My cat has been sleeping with us from day#1 and I cannot image us stopping that. You need to do things in steps. You are expecting her to be a totally different cat all at once.
It must break your DH's heart to hear her cry all night too. Maybe you need to open your heart up just a bit to this cat..

I wake Beemer during the day and make Scott rough house before bedtime so that she sleeps better. It is just like having a baby.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

We have two cats, got them when they were kittens, and believe it or not, we find two to be easier than one. They really do keep eachother occupied and it is absolutely not any more work than one is. We are both at work the whole day, and keep them out at night as well (because one of them has a habit of nursing on us) and they play with eachother, or nap together all night. They get the warmth and comfort from eachother, that they would normally seek from me and DH. As independent as cats are, they seem to really need some sort of connection, whether it be towards human owners, or other cats.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

Just be aware that this is not a kitten she is talking about- this is a cat that has lived with her DH for a long time- just the two of them. Bringing another cat into the house might not solve the problem but create even more.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

I would also recommend using a water gun/water bottle. We had adopted a cat (6 year old) last Dec. and for the first 6 weeks he had us up all night. Finally one night I had read on-line about water guns I decided to try it. Well the next night I squirted him and he ran. The following night all I did was hold the water bottle and he flew out of the room. Since then he has been much better. Good luck!

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

I don't want the cat on the bed because I dont want her to shed on it. It would gross me out. Although my husband has been putting this medicine in her food to contain the shedding I still dont want her on the bed. I did say that she has been good other than this night thing. She doesnt bother anyone and always does her own thing. Before we go to bed my husband brushes her, cleans her and her litter box and spends time with her. Last night she actually wasn't so bad, my husband said that he would take care of this problem and he got up during the night and disciplined her. The minute he heard her at the door he got up instantly and scolded her. She didnt bother us too much after that. I know that cats are not dogs, but if a cat knows when and where to go to her litter box and meows to let you know her dish is empty then she can learn that she is not supposed to do certain things.

Re: My Husband's Cat keeps us up at night.....

And I do feel bad when I hear my husband yelling at her and last night he hit her a little just a little and that made me feel worse. I told him that he didn't have to hit her but he says 'no she has to learn'