Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

Original post by princess99

Feb 02, 2004 09:22 AM

I have been lurking on this board for a few months now, and will be married in 55 days- but hey who is counting..... I need advice and opinions.
Fh went to a superbowl party last nite, I never stop him from going to these sporting events- he is a die heart sport fan. While he was at this party, and I was out wth my aunt having a girls nite out, his friend 'bryan' asked him to go to opening day at Shea stadium. This is 2 weeks after we are married. he said yes. When he told me about this last night, part of me got annoyed. Some of his frieds are still single by the way, and this one is. I know I probably am, being paranoid, but was it right of him to say yes and not ask me first? This guy I am afraid is going to do this all season to him... or does Fh need to have the ball$ and say no for any other sport event? Fh is a teacher so he is off till 2 days later. I made sure I was off of work to spend a lot of time with FH, well then he will be DH. Maybe I am just being paranoid because the wedding is getting closer. Help!

aliciahelene Posted: Feb 04, 2004 05:36 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

I think you may be just stressing because the wedding is getting closer, I think this because you said you usually have no problem with him going, but now because its after the wedding, it is bothering you. I think you are just stressed, stress makes us not think so clearly, believe me..i was there, before my wedding..i didnt know what was going on! I am sure that when that day comes, you wont mind at all...make a day for you to do something with girlfriends!!!!

princess99 Posted: Feb 04, 2004 06:17 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

I am happy some of you agreed with me. I was not going to respond to some of these posts,and I can take constructive criticism, but please remember what it was like right after your weddings and you were a new newlywed. My Fh and I have a wonderful relationship, and we will have a happy life together, I will not be a miserable wife, I was just asking if I was out of line about this. Normally it would not bother me, but I was wondering if it was wrong not to make sure there was anyhting else going on that day, considering I had made sure I was off from work then.I confronted Fh about this and he agreed with me, he should have made sure there were no other plans going on that day. he apologized immensly. Thank you for all of your honest opinions.

JodiBabe Posted: Feb 04, 2004 06:23 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

Posted by nrvbrd

It is only 1 friggin day. Honeymoon or not after 2 weeks of being with someone 24/7 would you NOT want a little break?

I honestly like having my DH home with me. We take breaks by doing our own things in the house. Him watching TV & me on computer or stitching. Together but separate.
It is not like we are sitting on top of each other.

BTW, I was a bit surprised by the amount of bite in some responses. I have always thought the NW side the nicer side.

mv1003 Posted: Feb 04, 2004 09:05 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

I didn't read your original post as you were looking for him to ask permission. I agree, it would've been nice had he checked in to see if you had plans made. However, he didn't, so if I were in your position, I would just tell him. You're happy he's getting to go, but can you please ask me in the future if we have set plans or something? I think it's that simple.

My hubby does not like sporting events, but he has a VERY time consuming 'hobby'. This hobby takes up a LOT of time. He knows I support it, but also get annoyed sometimes. One day, ok, the whole weekend, plus prep time.... and when he goes away. Believe me, he'd do this every weekend if I never said anything. He'll ask me know, if I mind if he goes this weekend? So, I understand. Patience, the asking will come.

princess99 Posted: Feb 04, 2004 10:07 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

Maybe I worded it worng, I did not mean permsion, I meant it would have been nice of him to ask me if we had plans for that day. I did not relaize I worded it that way. Thanks for pointing it out to me.

anna Posted: Feb 04, 2004 10:31 PM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

Posted by kmcwed

I'm not sure how I would feel about this. Maybe I'm in the minority here, but they will only be married for two weeks. What if she had something else planned for them? After all, she took off time from work so they could be together.

I don't think it's an issue of 'letting' each other do things, or asking for 'permission'. I think it's more an issue of having the courtesy to consult with your spouse before you make plans that don't include them--especially so soon after the wedding.

In my marriage, it goes like this...

DH: 'Honey, would you mind if I went to the game with Bryan on Saturday?'

Me: 'Sure, no problem.'

Or...

Me: 'Would you mind if I spent this weekend out at my mothers?'

DH: 'Sure, no problem.'

It's a simple demonstration of respect and consideration.

Just my 2 cents.

Karen, VERY WELL SAID

princess99 - I totally see your point too

nrvbrd Posted: Feb 05, 2004 09:39 AM

Re: Newlywed question, I will be one in 55 days.... Am I being too touchy?

Posted by JodiJohn903

Posted by nrvbrd

It is only 1 friggin day. Honeymoon or not after 2 weeks of being with someone 24/7 would you NOT want a little break?

I honestly like having my DH home with me. We take breaks by doing our own things in the house. Him watching TV & me on computer or stitching. Together but separate.
It is not like we are sitting on top of each other.

BTW, I was a bit surprised by the amount of bite in some responses. I have always thought the NW side the nicer side.

jodi, I am sorry that you think that we are not nice.

We were just expressing how we would feel if we were in that situation.

It seems as though Princess and FH have cleared things up so I guess all is well now.