Now that you are married are you helpful?

I know that now that we are married and we still frequent this site to chat and offer advice to the brides to be. My question is do you also do this outside of the boards?

I know of two people getting married in the next few months and I have offered them my help if they should need it. I have given them suggestion upon suggestion. I feel that I have learned so much, why not pass it on?

I just wanted to say that if it was not for this site I would not have had the wonderful wedding that I did. I say this because as I was planning my wedding so called friends of DH and I did not even offer a suggestion to us. These were people who had recently gotten married so you know they would have some advice and suggestions. I was hurt by that.

Just want to know whether you guys share your experiences with others?

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

totally! i was always helpful & wanting to help any of my friends or relatives that were getting married! (this is what i want to do & love doing)...

anyway...my brother is getting married next year & 2 other friends so i've given them so much advice already & 2 of them booked the same photographer as us! =) i don't see a need to hide anything....i think that if people ask you for advice-it means they really liked your ideas, etc...& i think it's a compliment!!

I wish i could do my wedding all over again-but not change one thing b/c it was absolutely PERFECT!!

nrvbrd--we had one of the best weather days of '03!!

jmo

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

Leap we really did. We lucked out big time!!!!

I think people who do not want to help are afraid that people might do a better job than them.

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

I have helped several girls off LIW after I was married, I went to their homes etc

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

If only someone would get married then I could help no one is getting married. There are people that ask for vendor rec for different events but not for weddings I wanna help someone, I wanna be a BM j/k It takes nothing to help at all

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

Hmmm, I wouldn't think that people who don't offer to help are being rude. Many people, myself included, are conservative with giving their opinions about things like weddings because they don't want to appear pushy or make you feel like they think you should do it their way. Some people don't like to offer their input on these things unless asked. Hope that makes you feel better.

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

JennP. I see your point. However there was one particular couple who got married before us, they were in the same boat as we were- ON a budget, paying for it themselves, trying to cut corners. So when it was our turn they knew we were going through the exact same thing. So at the least I thought they would say 'If you need anything just give us a call'? That is all.

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

I would love to be helpful but I only know of one upcoming wedding. It's my cousin in New Jersey and I know very little about Jersey vendors but I still offer advice as much as I can.

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

My best friend is getting married tommorrow- I am the maid of honor so of course i helped her. I think that when people ask me my advise I feel complimented. I love giving advice personally

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

K-
Just speaking from a STILL a 'bride to be' point of view.. everyone has offerend me their help for the past 2 years while I was engaged. I didn't think I would need so much help & I wanted to try to do things on my own (only child syndrome) Well, my wedding is in 2 weeks and of course, life just isn't perfect and I'm not done w/ everything I wanted to be done w/ at this point. (Mainly b/c FMIL didn't order the favors when I wanted them, so they're not IN & not wrapped). Well, 4 weeks ago, I knew the favors would be delivered this weekend. So, I recruited everyone I knew to help. I know there are better things to do... but, they offered. Especially this one 'friend'. She's told me 'anything you need'. I need this. She did ORGINALLY say she'd be there and we'll make a girls day out of it at my house. This is planned for tomorrow and she wrote me an e-mail telling me that she can't come. (If was a good excuse, I'd be more understanding...) Now, why offer help if you can't follow through? I NEVER say anything I can't do. I never promise anyone anything I can't produce. So, maybe people don't want to offer b/c they don't know how much they'll be able to do? Or, they probably just figure, if you wanted/needed anything, you'd ask. Especially where $$ is concerned- touchy subject.
I'm actually mad at this girl now for offering to help! Don't offer if you can't do it!

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

Nrvbrd, I agree. mv1003, don't blame you for being upset. It's amazing how your friends and family show their true colors during the wedding planning process.

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

when shelzyp was engaged I told her about the site...but she didn't catch on until I kept answering here questiosn with links to posts...


we talk everyday online about her wedding plans

Re: Now that you are married are you helpful?

Oh...of course! I had a longtime friend get married a few months ago. She planned her wedding within two months and I was there for her for advice or anything she needed!