Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

MSCJLK Posted: Sep 19, 2003 08:58 AM

Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I am having this little personal dilemma with myself and I need some of your opinions… I want all of you to be honest with your feelings Ok here it is.. My Bil is getting married in March and DH Best friend is getting married in Arpil.. 2 weeks apart from each other. Both are planning seperate Bachelor parties in Vegas. Money is extremly tight right now (but that is not the issue).... and DH and I are TTC( he is really persistant about this) . Do i have the right to tell him not to go? And he also said to me when we were in Vegas 3 months ago and i quote' I could never come here for a bachelor party.. i would get so bored..' I also feel that both my BIL and hid friend were in our wedding and my DH bachelor party was dinner at Angelo Maxies and A strip club and they were all home by 1am. Am I wrong?

jenny11.9 Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:02 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I think that your husband should choose one that he can go to . For monetary reasons only. It is really expensive. If he can't choose, then he should go to neither, and offer to take them both out for a nice dinner or ball game, etc. He can simply say 'two in a row will be hard for me guys...'

What does he want to do?

Jeanene Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:04 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

That is a tough one. Does your DH want to go? Does he have to decide now? And I guess I don't understand why you don't want your DH to go if money is not the issue - do you not like the idea of Vegas? Or is it the idea of a bachelor party in Vegas?

IrishTracy Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:09 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I don't think I could ever tell my husband that he can't go to either his brothers or his best friends bachelor parties. Because if it was my Sister & then my best friends bachelorette parties I wouldn't want him to tell me that I couldn't go!!

I would just remind him that he said he would be bored. And suggest that they can have a night out w/ your husband going to dinner & drinks.

You never know your husband might not want to go.

MSCJLK Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:13 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I forget to add that he is NOT close with his brother.. it is also a time off thing ..
He also not a HUGE gambler and not a drinker....

nrvbrd Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:15 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I am a firm believer that you should NEVER tell a man that he CAN'T do something. It only backfires.

You said money is not the issue why you do not want him to go- then what is the issue?

Do you not want him to go to a strip club?

IrishTracy Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:23 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

So as I said maybe once he thinks about it he won't want to go.

But, I agree w/ nrvbrd I NEVER tell my husband he CAN'T do anything!

MarcellaBella Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:29 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I think you are thinking into this too much and should just let him decide what to do..

Don't stress over it..

wacky Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:36 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I agree dont pull the reins too tight. TTC can happen regartdless if he goes to Las Vegas or not.

Let him chose, this way your not the bad guy

Diane Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:45 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I agree with the rest of the girls. Give him the choice, and dont be too persistant.

smooch Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:48 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

i don't think you should really ever tell your DH (or your DH tell you) whether or not you CAN or CANNOT do something.

you can tell him why you'd like him not to go, if you want. and he can tell you why he would or would not like to go.

but you two have to reach the decision together. (i say together because it involves a lot of money, time away, it affects you too - if it were local, i'd say it's completely up to him.)

MSCJLK Posted: Sep 19, 2003 09:55 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

Thanks.. smooch i think you are right i can tell him why I don't want him to go.

It does effect us.. but i will not stress baout it... thanks everyone

Scoop Posted: Sep 19, 2003 10:14 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

If it were me....I would let him decide.

Cira Posted: Sep 19, 2003 10:15 AM

Re: Ok I got a question..PLEASE HELP

I agree with Smooch. I would tell DH my thoughts and feelings on the matter but let him make the decision. Either way, I would tell him, that I would be ok with the decision he made - therefore no guilt involved.