OMG!!
My
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OMG!!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Wow - that's kinda bizarre, but I guess it's a nice gesture...
edited to say, I think I'd be annoyed too, though...
edited to say, I think I'd be annoyed too, though...
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Not sure how I would respond to that, but I would be so annoyed.
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Re: OMG!!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Its a nice gesture but she should of atleast called and let you know. I would have your DH say something to her about it.
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
she probably meant it to be nice, but she definately should have asked you first
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
LOL - you aren't nasty! You have every right to be upset!!!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
as long as she does not have a key to the house and can come over unannounced anytime.
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
wow, it sounds like you need to draw some boundary lines for this woman. Good luck!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
I know exactly how you feel...we rent from my mom who has a house but doesnt live here. She comes and does stuff all the time. At first it was annoying but now I just let it go...maybe i feel differently cause its my mom...but i know how you feel. ![]()
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Yikes!!![]()
Definately have DH say something to her![]()
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Whoa! ![]()
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Poor Demetra!!!!!! ![]()
What does Gus have to say?
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Re: OMG!!
Update
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
First off, sorry that this is even a issue in your life!
This is ridiculous. I can understand her brother wanting a second key close since he is so far away. I could even understand if your MIL said, 'I wanted to surprise you since I know you are so busy I didn't think you would have time to garden' but to just think that she can come and go as she pleases is not right. Many parents have a really hard time finding balance with their child when they get married, especially if they lived home up until the big day. You both probably need to learn how to manage this new situation. You are completely right in this situation, but I probably would have had my husband speak to his mother about it first. If they think not speaking to you is the way to work this out, they are really mistaken. Maybe your husband needs to call and say 'This is insane. We want to take care of our own yard and you are mad at us for that. I am XX years old and I think it is okay to want my own place and still speak to my parents at the same time' or something like that.
Don't let this go on and on though, even if you are right.
This is ridiculous. I can understand her brother wanting a second key close since he is so far away. I could even understand if your MIL said, 'I wanted to surprise you since I know you are so busy I didn't think you would have time to garden' but to just think that she can come and go as she pleases is not right. Many parents have a really hard time finding balance with their child when they get married, especially if they lived home up until the big day. You both probably need to learn how to manage this new situation. You are completely right in this situation, but I probably would have had my husband speak to his mother about it first. If they think not speaking to you is the way to work this out, they are really mistaken. Maybe your husband needs to call and say 'This is insane. We want to take care of our own yard and you are mad at us for that. I am XX years old and I think it is okay to want my own place and still speak to my parents at the same time' or something like that.
Don't let this go on and on though, even if you are right.
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Sorry you are going through this! Your MIL sounds like she is being dramatic. I love flowers and gardening, but planting flowers for someone without telling them you're coming over is just bizarre! It would be a different story if you were sick or on your HM and she wanted to surprise you and cheer you up. I'd be upset, too. I would definetly want a say in what goes on in my house!
My MIL is pushy but I think even this would be over the top for her!!!
My MIL is pushy but I think even this would be over the top for her!!!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
just a different opinion - I don't think it was worth it to cause this big rift between you all - unless there were other issues that were underlying. there are so many more important things in the world to be upset about - than someone planting flowers for you. She used poor judgement, but don't we all sometimes? I try and make it a point not to hurt others feelings unless they were intentially trying to do something wrong or harmful to me. I'm sure I'll get yelled at here, but just figured I'd share my opinion anyway!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
Demetra-dont take this the wrong way, but Im just trying to picture this as myself. Because it sounds like they are similar to my parents. (my mom does the same, if we have one little tiff, she'll say 'never again' LOL) so to be honest, she can just say 'you dont own this property' I know it sounds harsh and you are renting so you have all rights to it, but picturing this is if it were my mom, she would have ripped me to pieces for even being mad and not 'appreciating' her gesture.
My mom sometimes goes to my sisters house (they live nearby) and while my sis is busy with the kids, my mom will cook stuff for them, and sometimes my sis can come across ungrateful and say 'ugh, my kitchen is a mess, we had XYZ (food) 5 times this week, I dont need her to cook' and if she even MENTIONS something nicely like 'NO, REALLY, MOM YOU DONT HAVE TO COOK FOR US !!!' my mom will do the same 'NEVER AGAIN, THIS IS MY THANK YOU ???????????????' I know this cant compare as far as who owns what, but it can compare as far as a gesture that was well intended. After all, your MIL was planting flowers, she wasnt spray painting graffiti on your house, or killing your tomato plants. Just try to make ammends and not let it bother you anymore. As ridiculous as their 'Side of the argument' sounds, they do mean well, and we CAN come across as hurtful to them.
Hope you didnt take that the wrong way !
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My mom sometimes goes to my sisters house (they live nearby) and while my sis is busy with the kids, my mom will cook stuff for them, and sometimes my sis can come across ungrateful and say 'ugh, my kitchen is a mess, we had XYZ (food) 5 times this week, I dont need her to cook' and if she even MENTIONS something nicely like 'NO, REALLY, MOM YOU DONT HAVE TO COOK FOR US !!!' my mom will do the same 'NEVER AGAIN, THIS IS MY THANK YOU ???????????????' I know this cant compare as far as who owns what, but it can compare as far as a gesture that was well intended. After all, your MIL was planting flowers, she wasnt spray painting graffiti on your house, or killing your tomato plants. Just try to make ammends and not let it bother you anymore. As ridiculous as their 'Side of the argument' sounds, they do mean well, and we CAN come across as hurtful to them.
Hope you didnt take that the wrong way !
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Re: OMG!! I can't believe this!!
A
