POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

For all the newlyweds (and not so newlyweds), how is real marriage compared to how you thought it was going to be?


ETS: I voted for harder. But that might be due to my living arrangements right now.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

i voted easier...

the only hard part is remembering what my last name is

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I voted harder. I sometimes forget that there are two instead of one.

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we're tied at 3 to 3

I voted for easier. Its the same as before, just more special.

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Yes and no. I knew going in we would both have to make adjustments. We never lived together before and so it too a few months to get used to eachother's habits. We bicker from time to time on small stuff but for the most part we are having a blast.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

much easier (to me)

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easier than engaged life!!!! less stress

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You need a third choice.

I have to say a little of both. The compromise is what was not as easy and biting your tongue for peace and swallowing your pride. I love being married and I love the man I married, but now having to consider someone else with all you do, takes a little adjustment. The adjustment period was tough. We made it and we learned so much about us as individuals and us as a couple. We both grew and that I love.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

Well, I voted easier though I actually would have liked another choice of 'Same as I expected'. DH and I had been living together for almost 7 years and been dating almost 9 when we got married so, it was basically the same thing - I just get to introduce him as my HUSBAND now.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

definitely what I expected. (nothing's a breeze!) Not much has changed before we became engaged or got married. We always took each other into consideration when making decisions, etc.

We really love it though - marriage suits both of us very well

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I didn't vote b/c I think it's the same. We lived together for 2 years prior to marrying though.

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MUCH MUCH Better. I walk around with a smile on my face because we are soooo much better to each other than I thought we would be. We are so in love and everything at this point is so perfect, I am almost scared. I am like, this is just too good to be true. All the stress melted away and I find mysefl thinking why didn't I do this earlier??? Together, We are the best family I have ever had!!! I have never known a family like the one I am building with him!Sorry to be sappy, but it is true. Maybe I will feel differently later.

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I don't think ANY marriage is a cake walk, but I do not find marriage any more difficult than I thought it would be. I can easily see how marriages fall apart though. People become roomates, instead of partners. I think love is one important element, committment is another BUT communication is the key.

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So far so good!!!

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We've only been married for three months but I do find it easier. My DH is communicating better and is much more open, so I feel that I'm opening up more and trying to communicate better. He is making an effort, so therefore I'm making an effort. I think because we are trying to communicate better (not that there was a problem before), it's easier because we're both working on it and the work is not that hard.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

We all can easily say communication and compromise, but if we are to be truthful when your feelings and your pride is out there on the line, no one wants to be the bigger person all the time, or be the one to give in all the time. It takes work to not be afraid to be vulnerable, or to feel like you are being taken for granted etc, etc

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I'm actually surprised so many are saying it's easier than they expected.

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maybe I lucked out since DH was raised by all females and is very easy going...but I don't think there is any extra work at all...except maybe a little more cooking and laundry...

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Ok, I'll admit that marriage becomes harder than expected when it concerns housework. We have a deal that when one spouse cooks, the other does the dishes. Since I do 98% of the cooking, my DH is supposed to do the dishes. Yet, they sit in the sink for days and I can no longer cook (nor stand the smell) and then we fight. When he does the dishes, he tells me that he's such a wonderful husband because he did the dishes. Oy! But outside of the housework, marriage is still easier than I expected - for now.

Re: POLL: Is Marriage What You Expected?

I voted easier. But maybe that's because we lived together for more than 2 years before we were married.