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Wedding Forums > For Newlyweds Only > problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.
problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.
Maribelle7777 Posted: Aug 24, 2004 12:43 PM+
Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 12:43 PM bride-minus.png

problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

So how does one send a thank you to a bridesmaid that you do not talk to anymore, where she came to the wedding and her husband did not, yet the check and card had both their names on it? I do not want to be a b!tch and only address it to her, yet I don't want to thank both of them for attending the wedding since he did not.
ETA: I also have no desire to talk to her or make amends (at least for now, I'm still hurting from the incident even though I am partially at fault) - so I want the card to be short, sweet and to the point without being snotty.
Thanks.
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nsgraham Posted: Aug 24, 2004 12:52 PM+
nsgraham MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2267 WEDDING DATE: May 30, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 12:52 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

Thank you for the present and your kind thoughts.

addressed to both of the, since (I think) the idea was that the gift was from both of them.
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Donna Posted: Aug 24, 2004 02:54 PM+
Donna MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2988 WEDDING DATE: Apr 25, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 02:54 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

I agree - address it to the both of them and keep it simple.
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Sonicstef Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:10 PM+
Sonicstef MEMBER SINCE: 2/01 TOTAL POSTS : 8405 WEDDING DATE: Oct 05, 2002
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:10 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

Whether or not you are still talking to her, I still think you need to thank her specifically for spending the money and time to be in your wedding party...and her attendance and their gift.
Not sure how to phrase it since I Dont know the situation..maybe your husband can help you write in an detached way?
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xjulietx Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:15 PM+
xjulietx MEMBER SINCE: 4/03 TOTAL POSTS : 6638 WEDDING DATE: Jun 20, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:15 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

I would just address the note as Dear blank & blank, Thank you so much for your generous wedding gift. It was much appreciated.
BM Blank, thank you so much for being my bridesmaid and sharing our special day.

Use the card to address both them as a couple (for the gift) and her separately.

I did this for a few cards where one person didn't make it.
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Maribelle7777 Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:23 PM+
Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:23 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

Stef - I actually do agree with you on thanking her for being in the WP. She really did help alot that day. Our falling out has to do with the wedding a little and with other things but as far as helping me that day I have no complaints.

However, if my DH helped me to compose the card it would have a few choice words in it! LOL He was not happy how things turned out (even though I am partially to blame as well).



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Maribelle7777 Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:25 PM+
Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004
Posted: Aug 24, 2004 03:25 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

Thanks for your advice everyone!

Now here's another one - do you think I should send a card with a picture? I was just on the phone to DH and he said he didn't think I should. Yet her mother is getting one. I don't want to look like a total b!tch yet I can agree somewhat. She'd probably throw out the picture so why not give it to someone that would want it?

Then again it's only a picture.

TIA.
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suven Posted: Aug 25, 2004 05:22 PM+
suven MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5958 WEDDING DATE: May 30, 2004
Posted: Aug 25, 2004 05:22 PM bride-minus.png

.

.
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Scoop Posted: Aug 26, 2004 06:30 PM+
Scoop MEMBER SINCE: 5/02 TOTAL POSTS : 3687 WEDDING DATE: Nov 02, 2002
Posted: Aug 26, 2004 06:30 PM bride-minus.png

Re: problem - how to write a thank you note for someone I do not talk to anymore.

I would address it to both and thank them for their gift and special wishes. Keep it simple.
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