and how do you define love. Roger and I was sitting at our 1 yr dinner and I asked him if he had a crystal ball and could see the year that we had before he proposed would he have still married me and his response was yes. Someone sent me an article this am talking about a couple of these topics.
Then last week on kiss fm I was listening to a radio personality asking women that are married why did they get married. What is it that you are seeking from the other person that you could not have been fine with just shacking??
I want to hear what you ladies have to say on this topic.
Shamee
Posted:
Member since
Re: QOTD WHY DID YOU GET MARRIED??
I have to say, my reasons for getting married pretty much mirrored everyone elses; for the companionship of your best friend, to create a family based on the same ideals and values, etc. But I had something else in mind as well which I'll easily admit was a shallow reason. Long before the idea was every approached by husband (I never pushed the idea on him - well sort of :) ) I was told by several members of his family that I would never mean anything to him and that he would never marry me. Okay fine (jerks). So when the time came that I felt I needed to move on with my life, I let boyfriend go because of his reluctance to commit to a life together, blah, blah, blah. Within weeks of that decision (and discovering that I was starting to date, move on without him), he was pounding the door down and brought the topic up during our first get together in months of the breakup. We never discussed marriage beforehand, never brought up the usual 'When we get married, if we have kids' kind of interaction that occurs during a relationship. In my twisted little mind, I felt like by him asking me to marry him, I won. I showed them that I WAS valued by him. Of course I loved him to pieces and have had to swallow alot of *&%^ to be with him. Heading towards year #4 of marriage with him (10 years together total), I've learned alot, about myself and us as a team. I've learned what is important and what to let go. I've learned that I am human like everyone else and have my limits. As much as my committment to us is solid, my committment to myself is equally as important and that life has to have it's balance. I never got the chance to have that honeymoon stage and I feel sort of cheated because of the damage his family has caused and the emotional/physical toll the house has taken. But with the good comes the bad and all storms can be weathered....
natasha
Posted:
Member since
Re: QOTD WHY DID YOU GET MARRIED??
This is an excellent question. It must add that this is what this board should be about. Thank you Shamma for this great question.
I got married because I found my soulmate. I found someone who loved me beyond words, and I love him the same way. He was/is someone that would be there for me for the good and the bad. He has been my rock. He is someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and I wanted to have his children.
We lived together before we got engaged and married. Marriage has definitely added a new level of committment and love to our relationship. Now that we are pregnant, I love between us is even stronger.
jenny11.9
Posted:
Member since
Re: QOTD WHY DID YOU GET MARRIED??
I totally disagree that it's easier to walk out of a 'just living together' relationship than a marriage. We lived together for 9 years before we got married. Anybody on here would know..you don't get thru 9 years without MAJOR pitfalls. We didn't walk away at any point..even for a day. The commitment was a deep then as it is now. Getting married solidified our commitment to our families and friends and perhaps gave us both a deepened spiritual regard for one another as a result of sharing such a blessed sacrament and agreement - but I was in this thing no matter what. And so was he. We would never have walked away without trying as hard as we would today.
