Should I be relived or Insulted?

She must have asked them over the last couple of weeks. and they have not 'asked my DH yet...his brother had mentioned something right before the got engaged...
I thought I got along with my FSIL but I just dislike my BIL because he treats his siblings and his paretns like they are below him...and that annoys me i guess .. because If EVER spoke to my mother the way that my BIL talks to his .. My mother would have disowned me by now...
my being upset has turned into I am Bothered by the fact that the other two SIL are Maid/ matron of honors and that she did not respect my feeling enough to aleast let me know that she was unable to include me.
My BIL was my DH BM and he was not together with my FSIL when we got married...


Michele - i am going to do just that... and as I stated before.. I will just go to the wedding , go to the shower as a guest.. and thats it...

I think Micheles advice is just perfect and im glad you plan to do just that !
She's 'treating you' like 'just another guest' so you shall act that way !

Now off to the more exciting things in your life !

I wouldn't be insulted - it may have nothing to do with you starting a family. I wouldn't expect to be in my BIL/FSIL's bridal party unless we were very close. And you not getting along with your BIL just seems to be another good reason not to have you there. I understand its harder to swallow since other SILs are there, but - are those your husbands sisters? or did they marry into the family as well? If they're your husband's sisters, its totally understandable that they're involving all siblings. If not, perhaps she has closer realtionships with them?

I don't believe that if one of you is in the wedding party, the other should be too. I had Al's sisters in our bridal party, but not their husbands (his BIL's).

One of the BIL's did a reading - the one that we're closer too. The other did not have a role in the wedding.

Don't stress about it, and try not to be too hurt.

OK My last post about this...

Lisa- one is DH sister and the other is her SIL( her brother's Wife)


Ok i am done.. i will be upset.. but it will pass..

Thank you EVERYONE for being open and Hobest with me....

You guys are the best

It all depends on your relationship...

I did not have my BIL's wife in my wedding party (but her husband was Bestman and her 3 children were in the BP!!) for a number of reasons:

1. SHe lives in AZ and I met her maybe 3 times before the wedding.

2. DH and MIL hate her.


I did have my sisters FH walk my mother down the aisle...but that was only b/c my mom wanted to be escorted by someone she knew...not one of DH's friends

I understand what you are going through Jenn. At my husband's brother's wedding, not only was I not included in the wedding party, but I wasn't in ONE single 'family' picture either, and we were engaged at that point (are you surprised with that family though?). I felt like I was purposely left out of everything so that I would know where I stood with these people. At my wedding, I turned my cheek and invited her to be in my wedding party. When she started playing her games and became Queen Biotch, I removed her from my wedding party. You should have seen her puss all the way through the rehearsal dinner and wedding. All of my sister in laws, female cousins, even my sister in laws sister (who is like family to me) were in it. I hope she felt a pang of something that I did on her wedding day. Of course I was gracious enough to at least include her miserable butt in the 'faaaammmily' pictures.

I say better for you if you're not in it. It's one day and although it seems spiteful of her, you will look more of the lady that day if you have your head held high and smile so graciously. Make people wonder what her problem is (or BIL's) with you by being as sweet as you can. People like them just don't get it.