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tell me what mistakes not to make
MuchInLuvMichi Posted: May 19, 2004 10:32 AM+
MuchInLuvMichi MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3326 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2010
Posted: May 19, 2004 10:32 AM bride-minus.png

tell me what mistakes not to make

for all the girls who have already walked down the aisle..what mistakes should future brides not make??
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Maribelle7777 Posted: May 19, 2004 10:48 AM+
Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004
Posted: May 19, 2004 10:48 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

wear your watch at the reception. I didn't and time slipped away too fast for me.

If you want certain poses done with photographer - tell them when you meet with them. If you want pictures done with family members, make sure they are done right at the beginning of the reception because I didn't and we never got to have half of them taken.

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Anniegrl Posted: May 19, 2004 10:49 AM+
Anniegrl MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 5562 WEDDING DATE: May 01, 2004
Posted: May 19, 2004 10:49 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

- Do not assume anything when you're dealing with your vendors. Be VERY specific with them and keep records.

- Eat! I'm the type that needs to eat every couple of hours or I get really cranky and weak. So I ate a sandwich right before going to the church and then brought snacks with me too in the limo.

- If you're going to wear a ballgown, know that it gets VERY hot under there with all that crinoline! My dress was pretty heavy and even though it was a nice cool spring day, I was dying at the reception. I couldn't dance for too long without getting really hot.

- Don't wait until the last minute to do things, even if there are things that you think should be no problem. I almost got burned on a couple of things because of that.

- Delegate! I was pretty calm until a few days before the wedding where I had to pull all the little details together. Luckily one of my BMs who lives close by came over and helped me out with my programs, votive placecards, etc. The day of the wedding I also gave little tasks to a few family members because I realized that I just couldn't do everything myself (I'm a little bit of a control freak).

- If the rehearsal dinner is the night before the wedding, don't drink a lot and/or eat sweets or drink coffee right before you go to bed. I did this and was so wired that I couldn't sleep! I woke up numerous times during the night. It was terrible!

That's all I can think of! Hope that helps
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Valentinegirl Posted: May 19, 2004 11:20 AM+
Valentinegirl MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 7278 WEDDING DATE: Nov 14, 2010
Posted: May 19, 2004 11:20 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

Don't forget to eat. I did and was starving during the time we were taking pictures and couldn't eat til later.
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Donna Posted: May 19, 2004 11:48 AM+
Donna MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2988 WEDDING DATE: Apr 25, 2004
Posted: May 19, 2004 11:48 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

do anything you can now so that you don't have a lot to do right before the wedding. pack for your honeymoon,
if you're moving try to have everything set up (if it's important to you)
be as organized as possible
the idea of the photos was good
def. eat

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ddunne23 Posted: May 19, 2004 12:16 PM+
ddunne23 MEMBER SINCE: 7/02 TOTAL POSTS : 2060 WEDDING DATE: Dec 29, 2002
Posted: May 19, 2004 12:16 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

Don't harp on any problems that may arise. When you wake up that day, just let it all happen as it is meant to be.
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Sonicstef Posted: May 19, 2004 12:23 PM+
Sonicstef MEMBER SINCE: 2/01 TOTAL POSTS : 8405 WEDDING DATE: Oct 05, 2002
Posted: May 19, 2004 12:23 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

I think its really important to enjoy your ceremony and reception no matter what.

Easier said than done but I hear about so many brides who dont eat, dont dance, dont enjoy for a myriad of reasons. Its the most expensive meal you will ever eat and the most expensive party you will ever throw - do not dare let anyone ruin it for you. Do whatever you have to make sure everything is taken care before hand and all other problems will be handled by someone else.
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brideinapril Posted: May 19, 2004 04:22 PM+
brideinapril MEMBER SINCE: 11/03 TOTAL POSTS : 4443 WEDDING DATE: Apr 17, 2004
Posted: May 19, 2004 04:22 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

I agree with sonicstef, let all your anxiety go and just let yourself enjoy the day. It all goes way to fast and will be over in a blink.
Its your one day to really shine so let yourself!!!!!
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janwinterbridejoy Posted: May 20, 2004 07:19 AM+
janwinterbridejoy MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 6843 WEDDING DATE: Jan 09, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 07:19 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

i also agree that you have to let all your anxiety go on the day of the wedding because honestly there is very lil you can do if sometimes goes wrong at the point anyway. the best thing is for you to just enjoy yourself regardless because guests feed of the bride and groom if they see you on the dance floor and look happy and like your having a ball so will they. i have seen many weddings where the bride was in tears because the d.j was late or the food wasnt that great and the guets just get bummed because of it.

i would try and eat because you pick a place a lot of times because o fthe food and then you dont even tatse it on your day. i had to rely on what others thought of the food because i was just so busy.

if there are specific things or done a certain way with your d.j get it in writing and when there setting up slip into the room or request the mc come and see you and go over them the last time.

another important thing is giving a written list of all the important shots to your photographer and videographer. i didnt and missed quite a few still shots with my bridesmaids i really wanted.


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kathleenmarie Posted: May 20, 2004 07:59 AM+
kathleenmarie MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1781 WEDDING DATE: Mar 28, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 07:59 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

eat
let things go
enjoy every second
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Barakabella Posted: May 20, 2004 11:38 AM+
Barakabella MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 262 WEDDING DATE: Apr 05, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 11:38 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

I said this on the recent review of my wedding but it bears repeating. It is similar to what sonicstef said. Enjoy the day -- stuff WILL go awry but you set the tone for everything. One of the nicest things my groom did was ahve us walk around and intorduce ourselves to all the servers and bandmembers at the start of the wedding -- made them really appreciate that we appreciated them being there. If you are having fun so will everyone else. Noone will notice stupid little things -- in fact they are some of the sweetest moments. One monogram thing at the wedding got my husbands initial wrong -- L instead of D -- so I started calling him Larry, and so did some of the guests--it wass spontaneous and quite funny. So just go with the flow and enjoy!

On a planning note:
-use the boards to negotiate pricing
-hire day of planner
-pick reputable experiencd vendors

Best of luck
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Niecey Posted: May 20, 2004 11:56 AM+
Niecey MEMBER SINCE: 6/01 TOTAL POSTS : 5965 WEDDING DATE: Oct 26, 2002
Posted: May 20, 2004 11:56 AM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

Agree with Stef 100%. Once planning is said and done - one your big day - enjoy it. You did your planning now time to enjoy. You shouldn't be the one barking orders and orgainzing things. That should have all been done and now being taken care of by your vendors. And my biggest advice - is to be yourself!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate when brides and grooms aren't themselves on their wedding day. Go enjoy!!!!!!!!!!
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tracyg Posted: May 20, 2004 12:04 PM+
tracyg MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5129 WEDDING DATE: May 09, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 12:04 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

i'm afraid i was TOO MUCH of myself on my wedding day... almost every pic i see i'm making some kind of face. lol
i hope Steve got some pics of me looking normal!!
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Sonicstef Posted: May 20, 2004 12:08 PM+
Sonicstef MEMBER SINCE: 2/01 TOTAL POSTS : 8405 WEDDING DATE: Oct 05, 2002
Posted: May 20, 2004 12:08 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make


If you are having fun so will everyone else.


So true!

Ive been to so many weddings where there was very little dancing and the bride told me afterward how disappointed she was. BUT SHE WASNT DANCING! The guests look to the couple as a model of how to behave. If you are having a great time, everyone else will follow suit.
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Chloegirl Posted: May 20, 2004 12:15 PM+
Chloegirl MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 3331 WEDDING DATE: May 01, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 12:15 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

Right before I walked down the isle and after the Ketubah was signed there was so much going on. DH and I really had to take a step back away from everyone and think about what was really happening. Its so easy to get caught up in conversation and logistics and forget about what REALLY is going on and I didnt want that to happen. You are getting MARRIED....try not to lose sight of that...it's so exciting and emotional.

Have FUN!!! Once we got into the reception we just danced the night away. We literally didnt miss a song. I forgot about my hair, lipstick etc. and just had the time of my life.

Also...I know someone mentioned it above...but it is HOT under the petticoat. I had a ball gown with lots of stuff going on under there. I was very hot at times but it was just a sign I was having such a good time But think about this if you are having an outdoor wedding in the summer!
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tracyg Posted: May 20, 2004 12:38 PM+
tracyg MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5129 WEDDING DATE: May 09, 2004
Posted: May 20, 2004 12:38 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

exactly. when i wasn't greeting people, i was dancing!! and there really were a lot of people dancing all day!! (wish i could have danced MORE but you gotta make the rounds) I even made it out for the electric slide (the only line dancing allowed hehe)

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sept20yay Posted: May 20, 2004 05:32 PM+
sept20yay MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 454 WEDDING DATE: Sep 20, 2003
Posted: May 20, 2004 05:32 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

Biggest: LEAVE EXTRA TIME..... I'm talking hours. Assume everything will take triple the time before the wedding. You will not be sorry.

Additionals:

Bring chalk for your dress. A white dress with a train will get so dirty and up at the alter, people will be looking at your dress. Bring chalk to chalk out stains.

Bring a little steamer. Your dress will get wrinkles.

Dont seperate from your new husband for one minute during the reception. You will lose each other with the sea of people at the affair. 5 minutes alone with Uncle Neil could easily turn into 20 minutes of being apart. People want to see you together. Makes the affair. Make a deal with each other that you wont leave each others side.

Do not take pictures on grass if you have white heels. My heals of my gorgeous white pumps were digging into the grass during pict time and they were grass stained. If not you with pumps, mom, sis, or grandma's heels will be ruined. Know where you will take pics there Before.

Finally, Take vitamins a few days before. I didn't and my homeymoon was ruined because DH and I had the worst flu ever. For DH, it was so bad we came back to NY and he was hospitalized. Your body is ripe for infection at your wedding- You are kissing 200 people on the way in to the reception, 200 people as they leave, you are in sweaty cramped quarters, suffering from lack of sleep, you will have just finished a stressful occasion in your life, and then you are on a plane with recirculated air. Take care of your body beforehand with major vitamins and echinacea. JMO.

One more, have someone pack up your meals (which you wont end up eating) and grab food for you during the cocktail hour (one of everything for each of you) and two pieces of large wedding cake for you and your husband to enjoy later. The best minute of my big day was sitting on the floor of the hotel suite at 4 in the morning eating ALL of our food and recalling the night. Yum!!!

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aliciahelene Posted: May 20, 2004 05:41 PM+
aliciahelene MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5540 WEDDING DATE: Oct 05, 2007
Posted: May 20, 2004 05:41 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

If I could redo ANYTHING..I wouldnt have stressed about every little stupid thing..I made myself crazy, I did enjoy the weddinga nd didnt stress at all that day..it was the prewedding days that I was a lunatic!!! Just ENJOY and tell yoruself to remember the moment!!! have avideographer, not everyone finds a video necessary..but in my opinion..its so much more than pictures..it brings it all to life and recaptures things you didnt even know happened!
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pschica Posted: May 22, 2004 12:37 PM+
pschica MEMBER SINCE: 3/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5773 WEDDING DATE: Nov 16, 2003
Posted: May 22, 2004 12:37 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

enjoy and don't let little things bother you - we didn't - we figured anythign that went wrong that day couldn't be fixed - and lu ckily nothign did but its out of your control anyway!!!
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HearzBellz Posted: May 22, 2004 01:26 PM+
HearzBellz MEMBER SINCE: 4/03 TOTAL POSTS : 10392 WEDDING DATE: Oct 31, 2014
Posted: May 22, 2004 01:26 PM bride-minus.png

Re: tell me what mistakes not to make

The suggestions about the pics were right on. We have NO pics with his family b/c they were impossible to find after cocktail hour.

The only thing I would have told the hall is to tell the bartenders to cut people off if they look drunk - we had a couple of problems with that

Also, try to expereince your wedding WITH your new DH.... I lost DH for about an hour when his friends grabbed him & started playing c-low in the bathroom......'for old times sake.' It was funny, but then we did the cake cutting late because of it & i have many many wedding pics of myself

TRY AND RELAX. problems are so secondary once the day comes. The ceremony is serious, but the reception is a party. If you are not having fun, then it does not matter what else is going on.
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