******** November 20 ********
I have to take a moment to apologize for my absence... I was so busy trying to finish up my college semester early so that I can go on vacation with a clear head that before I knew it I hadn't been on here in about three weeks! I'm happy to report that now, I'm just about done which is about one month shy of the real end of the semester! Now, I can go on my anniversary trip to Jamaica and really enjoy myself. I also took a second job in retail for the holiday season along with my regular day job - between that and weekends with Kenneth things got hectic and allowed very little free time. Now that the semester is pretty much done (I got a 4.0 again!!!) I can have a little breathing room. Kenneth will be so happy to see how I'm doing in school because it was so important to him that I went back and do well.
A big thank you to all of those who wrote to me asking how Kenneth was or who posted on here - it means THE WORLD to me to know that people still care - even six months later. We just passed the six month mark - November 18th (Tuesday). That day, my mom, sister, nephew and I were in Schenectidy for an awards luncheon honoring law enforcement people who combat drunk driving. My brother's inspector nominated him for the award and he won!! We were planning on happily driving the 4 hours there and then another 4 hours back to accept the award on his behalf but then the Commissioner offered to have us driven - which was really nice of him considering we probably would have gotten lost in Albany or something otherwise! The Chief of Police came along with the Commish, the Inspector who nominated Kenneth and the District Attorney, Kathleen Rice, was there to accept her own award. She came with ADA Maureen McCormick who has been so wonderful in taking care of Kenneth's case. It was nice to see all of them, update them and show them pictures of Kenneth.
We now have, in an album, pictures from those horrific days at NUMC up until just last weekend... there are pictures showing his progress on a week-by-week basis. They are all dated and I made it my mission, from the beginning, to take these pictures - as hard as they were to take them then I kept telling myself that ONE DAY Kenneth is going to be better -- and one day he will want to see how far he has come. I also didn't want to ever forget where we came from - where he was - because, as time goes on, you DO forget... now, since he is doing better I enjoy taking the pictures. Looking through that album is UNBELIEVABLE. I made a copy of the album for the doctors at Kessler to show other families who come in --- to give them hope for their loved ones. We now see people come in everyday (their first days at Kessler) that remind us of how Kenneth looked when he first got there -- I remember first going there with him and looking around at how every single person was in better condition than Kenneth. It was so difficult not being able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Now, we look around and Kenneth is doing the most out of everyone in the gym - Kenneth is now the inspiration for other people to look at to say - 'If I keep trying, I'll get there'.
We have seen such a dramatic improvement in Kenneth these past few weeks. Now, the improvements are more rapid (rapid in brain injury world, by the way, is different than rapid in the real world) but for us -- we can't believe how great he looks and what he can do. Everyday, he wheels himself now (in his new, lightweight, wheelchair) -- we remember the days of him not being able to even SIT UP in the wheelchair and his chair back then looked like a BED on wheels... but now, he wheels himself down to the gym and on his day off (Sunday) we'll go past and he'll stop the wheel like he wants to go in and work out! He looks kind of bummed when I tell him 'No, Ken, today is your day off' -- He mouths words like clear as day: Hello, Hi, Mom, Dad, Ball, Pen, Love, You -- and follows whatever you show him. Dr. Fellus said that in all his years he has NEVER seen a patient try as hard as Kenneth -- he has never seen anyone as dedicated as Kenneth is. After therapy in the AM, he comes back and goes to the bathroom -- has his lunch -- goes to the bathroom again and then goes to afternoon therapy. The other day he actually did an entire puzzle, STANDING UP leaning on a table for some extra support!!! ... and he even was able to stand up with a cane while throwing hoops around a cone. The movement in the right arm has come back so much and the leg is a little bit behind the arm but still coming back - and he moves it more and more each day.
After his afternoon therapy he comes back to his room and is eager to get into bed for some rest... He gets in bed with our assistance and moves his bed up where he wants it to be (using the buttons)... pulls over the TV (it is on the wall on a long arm that he can control) and surfs through the channels for his favorite show: Law & Order. Then, he sits there, and watches EVERY MINUTE of it in rapture. He will only give us his attention during commercial breaks lol. He fully understands everything that is happening because he will LOOK at you when something 'big' happens kind of for a reaction... it is amazing. Then, he has dinner, sometimes he'll 'read' the newspaper -- how much of it he is reading we have NO clue but he sits there, like normal, with the paper open (there are no pictures on the page) and I see his eyes going back and fourth like normal reading. I gave him a greeting card he rec'd the other day from a family friend - he scanned it like he is reading it and at the end, when the friend said something funny, he smiled and chuckled. We were like UMM apparently he is reading?! Who knows but it is amazing. If he couldn't make out at least SOME words WHY would he sit there scanning away like everyone does when they read?
He now nods his head yes and shakes it no instead of thumbs up and down -- or he'll mouth YES or NO and he does it so clearly. He is writing with his left hand amazingly well and Dr. Fellus was so blown away by his efforts in speech that he started to get choked up - I mean, the head doc who sees it ALL was getting choked up. Kenneth will sit there and follow whatever his speech person mouths for him - and he is will TRY SO HARD to mouth it back and most of the time - he does. Then, at other times, we get vowel sounds and different sounds (especially when he laughs - we hear his voice every single time) -- it is just a matter of MERGING the mouthing of full words with the sounds. Thankfully, he can mouth words -- some brain injury patients don't even know what a pen is -- or they have no clue WHO mom is -- or if they know their mom they don't understand that THAT person IS your MOM. KWIM?? So, the fact that he does fully understand all of these things is unbelievable - it is just a matter of turning the sound on.
At night he is ready to interact with us -- he plays trouble with Christopher. He will BOP the bubble, get a 3, and move his piece three places - on his own. We also play UNO and he loves to be able to interact with and play with Christopher. At night, after Law & Order, his routine is usually Everybody Loves Raymond re-runs followed by Seinfeld. Amazingly, there is ALWAYS an episode of Law & Order on TV for him to watch and most of the time he watches them back-to-back. The other day, to our astonishment, he flipped through and stopped on an old James Bond flick - James Bond was my brother's favorite movies and when he was younger he had the ENTIRE collection. It is unbelievable that his personality is 100% the same when brain injury to the frontal lobe - where his is - can completely change someone's personality.
The amount of amazing things he does get to the point where I struggle to remember them for my journal -- I keep saying, oh god don't forget that he did THIS. We showed him his award the other night after we got back from upstate with it -- it was beautiful and the Inspector made a touching speech about Kenneth that made my mom, sister and I cry A LOT lol I was not anticipating that. We had countless state troopers and other police officers come up - with tears in their own eyes - to say how much they pray for Kenneth and how often they think of him. We continue to get letters six months later - it is amazing.
Now, we have to go to court tomorrow because the person that hit him thinks it is unfair he has not been let out on a reasonable amount of bail. The reason the the bail is so high is because he is a flight risk -- he has NEVER appeared in court for his countless summons' he rec'd prior to hitting Kenneth -- he has addresses all over the country. He has no job tying him here - so, because of HIS actions and irresponsible behavior he has a high bail. He wants to be able to get out for the holidays. Mind you, my family will be having a Boston Market Thanksgiving at Kessler - which is basically like a hospital. So, WHY should he be let out when my brother is still in his own prison? It just shows the disregard for other people -- and the selfishness. If he gets out, he gets out - but what a disgrace.
Thanks so much for reading - I know this is long
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