It looks like we dodged a bullet on this one, but there was a very real possibility it could have happened ...
Within a few weeks after our wedding, two people close to DH & I got engaged:
* One is my cousin (closest in age to me out of all 60+ cousins that i have). She currently lives in Florida, and I think that is where the wedding will be.
* The other is DH's college roommate, fraternity brother and very close friend, who he still sees on a weekly basis during football season, etc. He was a groomsmen at our wedding. They live on LI, but he is from Mass. The wedding would either be on LI or in Mass, I guess.
For some reason, last night I was convinced they were both going to somehow magically end up choosing the same wedding date. So I asked DH what we would do if that happened. He looked at me and said, 'Well, I *can't* miss his wedding ...' (honestly, I could never in a million years ask him to miss this friend's wedding ... they're so close, and it would be a big reunion for all their friends from college). And the other wedding is my cousin ... its family ... so, I don't see how I could possibly miss a family wedding for a friend's wedding?!
So ... would you & your DH go to the weddings separately? Or would you pick one of the 2 events and attend as a couple? Do people do that?!?! I'm so curious!
joshisgirl
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hmmm, that's kinda tough. i'd like to be able to go with dh, but if not i guess i would go without him (as long as i knew other people that would be there) plus, i would make both couples happy since at least half the couple came.
OR would they be offended??
forget it, i don't know, i need sleep
diva7531
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I would suggest going seperatley and I think DH would be OK with that.
But my partner says the same thing!
rfilipofornow
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well, this is a slightly different situation, but my MOH (i'm her MOH) is getting married this upcoming May on the SAME DAY my SIL is graduating from college!!! since i'm in the wedding, i obviously can't miss it and since SIL is my DH's ONLY sibling, he can't miss her graduation either, so yeah, i'll be going to my BFF's wedding solo! although, since my brother lives in Orlando (her wedding is in Disney World), he's coming as my guest, so i won't really be going alone. but we just didn't see a way around this situation. i'm super bummed, but what can you do?
EverlovingEv
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If they picked the same date and DH was close to one couple and I was close to the other couple and we both absolutely positively HAD to go to the weddings - I guess we'd have to go seperately. I wouldn't like it, but I wouldn't want to upset close friends/family. I'd rather my best friend came to my wedding without her husband then not show up at all.
MJDoc12
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Re: W W Y D?
if you can swing it---i would just go separately to the weddings. like you said---YOU don't want to choose a friend over a family member---but your DH doesn't want to miss a great friend's wedding for a cousin of yours.
if its affordable and in the cards--i see nothing wrong with flying solo on those days. its just one day! (or weekend)
magbride
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oy, dealing with the same situation. DH's cousin and my close college friend are getting married on the same day. It looks like one is a day wedding and was is evening, so hopefully we can do both. And luckily both are on LI. Is splitting up an option for you? I would consider that. Although, if I didn't go to DH's cousin's wedding, I feel like it would upset the family.
curiousgeorge
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I would go seperatly!!! Its not like the both of you wont know anyone in any of the weddings....i think its fine to go seperatly...But i would book any flights till last minute...just incase you change your minds.
cookiemonster
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Definitely ok to go separately. The only time that I would not do that is if I wouldn't really know anyone at the wedding I wanted to go to (i.e., if DH had a family member's wedding and I had a good friend's wedding but he/she didn't really invite anyone else from our group). I think it's fine if you know other people going and know you'd have fun with them even though DH wasn't there.
DrWho
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Re: W W Y D?
Ok, it's sneaky, but I'd go to the friend's wedding that's closer, and tell my cousin I'd already made travel plans. In fact, I probably would have preemptively made travel plans if it were possible, so it's only half-sneaky.
Honestly, I don't think it's so bad to miss a cousin's wedding. My cousin is getting married in Florida in May, and I've been asked by 4 other cousins if I'm going, so apparently people don't presume that you MUST be going.
drpepper318
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We'd go separately. Especially if they were both must-attend weddings for each of us.
Drv0716
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We would definately go separately.
TnOiOnL
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aw man thats so rough.. I know if I had a very close friend or relative, DH would want to be there too, and vice versa... But if that DID happen, best thing to do is go separate and atleast have 1 of you at either wedding.
jtgarsik
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we'd go separately...sometimes u just gotta do those things. it may not always be what we WANT to do, but it's definetly what is best.
PegaLega
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We would probaby attend seperately. My cousin would be my family and yes technically she would be DHs cousin too, but I know to my DH his friends are like his family more then even my closest cousins. I would definitely go seperately.
PattyK
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DH & I would go seperately.
jenn122397
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this actually happened to dh and i over the summer
one of my good friends from HS got married and i was one of her BMs
DH's best friend from when he was little got married the same day and asked sean to be his best man
we had no choice but to seperate for the day and go to the wedding we were in
LitBallerinaGirl
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Re: W W Y D?
DH and I are in a similar situation. My cousin (not through blood, it's my god mother's daughter) is getting married on LI the same day one of DH's bestfriends is getting maried in Mass. Most likely we will go to DH's friend's wedding in Mass because they are really close and I am not that close with my cousin. We barely see each other. (I think DH has met her 4 times) My family is not going to be happy about it, but that is something I will deal with when the time comes.
But your boat might be a bit different than mine. Are you close to your cousin? Would you be more upset if you weren't able to go to one wedding over the other? Hopefully you won't have to make the decision to attend one wedding over the other.
