3 of my bridesmaids want to get pregggers!

I think the original post for this thread was just that a bride's BMs are dropping out or talking about dropping out because they might be pregnant, and I took it to mean that it's creating a hard time for the bride because now she has to rearrange stuff. So I would say I don't think she was asking anyone to hold off on TTC.

But then again if I'm understanding some of the other responses afterwards, I think maybe the comments about asking someone to hold off on TTC is more just in response to something that other people posted rather than the original poster.

And I just wanted to clarify in my post to this thread, I totally wasn't even saying either that I wanted someone to hold off on TTC. My thing was I think the people should try to go forward and be in the wedding party, even if they are pregnant, or trying to get pregnant, etc. Of course if complications come up during the pregnancy, it'd then be understandable to have to drop out, and I would think most people would be understanding. If one of my BM came to me and was having some sort of trouble with her pregnancy and she then needed to drop out, I'd be totally understanding about and not be mad and probably find some way to reimburse her for the dress she might've bought or tried to get her some money back. I think it's just weird for someone to just say oh I might be pregnant so I just have to drop out now. I mean they don't even know if they will be pregnant. I think if they're a true friend, they should at least try. I say sit down ahead of time, talk about how she might try to get pregnant, so if this and this happens, she might need to drop. I think there are ways to work around this whole thing rather than saying I just can't be in your wedding party at all.

I just wanted to maybe get this thread back on track cause I feel like we were getting away from the intention of the original post. I think the poster was just venting and sharing her stress in now having to figure things out cause a wrench has been thrown into the plans. And I also just wanted to clarify that I didn't mean to give anyone the impression in my post that I wanted anyone to hold off on TTC.

I'd be totally ok if any of my BM were pregnant. Well, except my 13 year old neice But I would be very sad if they dropped out b/c of it. I think most bridal stores can be very accomodating of expectant mothers, and they'd be able to find a beautiful maternity dress for them!

Plus, think about how hysterical it would be to look back at your wedding album and have ALL pregnant BM! I think that would be really memorable.

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Posted by MKEA98

I think the original post for this thread was just that a bride's BMs are dropping out or talking about dropping out because they might be pregnant, and I took it to mean that it's creating a hard time for the bride because now she has to rearrange stuff. So I would say I don't think she was asking anyone to hold off on TTC.

But then again if I'm understanding some of the other responses afterwards, I think maybe the comments about asking someone to hold off on TTC is more just in response to something that other people posted rather than the original poster.

And I just wanted to clarify in my post to this thread, I totally wasn't even saying either that I wanted someone to hold off on TTC. My thing was I think the people should try to go forward and be in the wedding party, even if they are pregnant, or trying to get pregnant, etc. Of course if complications come up during the pregnancy, it'd then be understandable to have to drop out, and I would think most people would be understanding. If one of my BM came to me and was having some sort of trouble with her pregnancy and she then needed to drop out, I'd be totally understanding about and not be mad and probably find some way to reimburse her for the dress she might've bought or tried to get her some money back. I think it's just weird for someone to just say oh I might be pregnant so I just have to drop out now. I mean they don't even know if they will be pregnant. I think if they're a true friend, they should at least try. I say sit down ahead of time, talk about how she might try to get pregnant, so if this and this happens, she might need to drop. I think there are ways to work around this whole thing rather than saying I just can't be in your wedding party at all.

I just wanted to maybe get this thread back on track cause I feel like we were getting away from the intention of the original post. I think the poster was just venting and sharing her stress in now having to figure things out cause a wrench has been thrown into the plans. And I also just wanted to clarify that I didn't mean to give anyone the impression in my post that I wanted anyone to hold off on TTC.

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i agree

i think the OP was saying she was upset that the girls were like 'oh i may be pregnant i am dropping out' and i understand being upset by that

my cousin had THREE pregnant bridesmaids and one was 8.5 months and she was a trooper!! she got flats to wear after the ceremony and she even made it to the after hours

i am partially responsible for getting it off track bc some of the comments after just came off as so selfish and i felt the need to attempt to show just HOW selfish their sentiments were

Honestly, I understand you wanting your friends to be part of your bp but at the same time having a baby is such a huge thing and i honestly don't think that somebody has to put that on hold for somebody else, i don't think that for a wedding everybody has to put their own lives on hold...i mean if i wanted a baby badly, and i wouldn't hold off a long time bc of it, i can go to a wedding pregnant

BUT the whole thing about her saying she will be 9 months pregnant at the wedding and maybe not being able to go, i think she means that she will be 9 months and who knows if she'll have it right before, the day after or whatever the case might be. I think some people also forget about the fact that yes some women are fine at 8 months or so and can do it, walk down the aisle without any problems...but not everyone is lucky enough to have such an easy pregnancy...there are some women who are told by their doctors that they have to be bed ridden for a few months before their due date bc of different circumstances. I mean if ppl have been around alot of pregnant women then you'll know that around 8-9 months your feet swell up ALOT, many women i know couldn't even wear regular shoes bc of this they had to wear flip flops or other type of slippers. Many are sick and do not feel well. I worry about my own pregnancy bc i have very low blood pressure and many who do have this have to be bed ridden before their pregnancy. My mother had an intoxicated sac, which simply means the amniotic fluid also gets outside of the placenta which causes a woman to be sick the entire pregnancy...she was sick from month 1 and it wasn't just morning sickness but it was 24/7 and towards the end she could barely get up from sitting and was very uncomfortable.

This isn't just to the OP but also other posts in the thread, if a pregnant woman is saying she can't be in the bp bc of her pregnancy and her being worried then i think that has to be taken into consideration. And also can't get mad at all pregnant friends bc sometimes its not planned, it just happens.

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Posted by MsBride0808

honesly, i told my girls that if they got pregnant, i could not have them in the wedding from the start... as of yet none have and i really hope not.

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well we want our friends to be happy for us and give up their lives, but isn't this showing that we wouldn't be happy for such an important time in their lives...i mean imagine if you got pregnant and your friends instead of being so happy for you were upset with you, i know if that was the reaction of any of my friends or family that would crush me...it would be like i don't matter. ANd in that case if a person feels like that by the reaction they get then in turn they will not care so maybe this is why some bm's just drop out for that reason ALONE, maybe otherwise they would just deal with it and be in the bp but to get that response they feel as if their life is not important so why should they make the extra effort.

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Posted by Snowflake08

well, if you want HONEST opinions
i can understand you feeling disappointed
but not angry

people cant put their lives on hold for others' needs or wants

JMHO

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I agree....you can be upset because it is a really upsetting situation, but some people have children by a certain time for a reason or a # of different reasons, and you cant get mad at them for wanting children.

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Posted by shcole08

I know I agree. I am just disapointed. Mostly, just about my one friend who dropped out of my bridal party. I just want her to be there. I don't understand why she can't be pregnant and in my wedding.

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because at 9 months of pregnancy , you are sore, fat, tired of being pregnant, ready to pop, and may be having mild contractions, so you dont want to get dressed up and be in a bridal party

What is TTC? How does everyone know all these acronymns?

I think alot of people are really taking this too seriously. The op seemed to be kind of hurt that her bm's were dropping out on the possibility that they may become pregnant. Which means there is a good possibility also that they may not be pregnant by the time the wedding rolls around.

There is a big difference b/w being sad/disappointed and being angry/telling someone that their life and beginning a family has to be put on hold.

I see nothing wrong with being a little bummed about bm's dropping out or being a little extra stressed b/c of having to change orders and plans around to accomodate a pregnant bm (i.e. altering dress orders that have already been placed). It's not about someone being fat in pics.

Well, that is just my take on it.

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Posted by lwny427

What is TTC? How does everyone know all these acronymns?

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Trying To Conceive.

People can't plan their lives around our weddings... plain and simple. HOWEVER, for a BM to drop out because she MIGHT be PG is a little ridiculous IMO....

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Posted by lwny427

What is TTC? How does everyone know all these acronymns?

I think alot of people are really taking this too seriously. The op seemed to be kind of hurt that her bm's were dropping out on the possibility that they may become pregnant. Which means there is a good possibility also that they may not be pregnant by the time the wedding rolls around.

There is a big difference b/w being sad/disappointed and being angry/telling someone that their life and beginning a family has to be put on hold.

I see nothing wrong with being a little bummed about bm's dropping out or being a little extra stressed b/c of having to change orders and plans around to accomodate a pregnant bm (i.e. altering dress orders that have already been placed). It's not about someone being fat in pics.

Well, that is just my take on it.

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I absolutely agree with you, like you said, I think the OP was just disappointed (As anyone in that situation probably would be) that her bms don't want to be in her wedding if they're pregnant at the time, not because they are choosing to become pregnant..