A Church said NO!

A LONG VENT!

I called a Protestant Church near my FH in Bay Shore to inquire about having our ceromony held there. My parents, who were in a situation simuliar to ours were married there and since they are happy for 17 years (second marriage for both), I was hoping to use the same church as them.

My FH is Catholic and I am Protestant so we definatley cannot get married in his church because a non-Catholic cannot get married in a Catholic Church.

Well to try and shorten the story, I called the Church in Bay Shore and spoke with a receptionist and asked if we could meet with them. She gave us an appointment but later called back and said that she spoke with Pastor Johnson and he said he will NOT marry people who are not members of the church. I WAS SHOCKED!

I do not go to church every wekeend and do not want to push my beliefs on others but it is my understanding that a church is supposed to be the House of God. Who is the Pastor to tell people they are NOT welcome to get married in God's HOUSE! He did not even know my fiance was Catholic and all he knew was that I was not a member of their church. I am insulted! I cannot believe this happened.

Has anybody ran into difficulty with finding a church to marry them? I am so mad about this. I cannot even begin to tell you how much!

Thank for reading, sorry it was so long.

HOLY MOLY!!!!

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Posted by coxmandi

A non Catholic can get married in a Catholic church. My FH is protestant and I'm Catholic. 90% of the people in our Pre Cana were only Catholic on one side.

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yes but you have to sign papers saying your children will be raised catholic

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Posted by Soon2BeMrs2006

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Posted by coxmandi

A non Catholic can get married in a Catholic church. My FH is protestant and I'm Catholic. 90% of the people in our Pre Cana were only Catholic on one side.

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yes but you have to sign papers saying your children will be raised catholic

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This is true...but you don't HAVE to raise them catholic...its not like they are gonna send you to Catholic prison...

I know people that just sign it so they can have their ceremony

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Posted by Nina

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Posted by Soon2BeMrs2006

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Posted by coxmandi

A non Catholic can get married in a Catholic church. My FH is protestant and I'm Catholic. 90% of the people in our Pre Cana were only Catholic on one side.

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yes but you have to sign papers saying your children will be raised catholic

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This is true...but you don't HAVE to raise them catholic...its not like they are gonna send you to Catholic prison...

I know people that just sign it so they can have their ceremony

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yea but FH and i werent comfty with that. hes catholic and i'm christian orthodox

Just personal pref I guess

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Posted by Nina

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Posted by Soon2BeMrs2006

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Posted by coxmandi

A non Catholic can get married in a Catholic church. My FH is protestant and I'm Catholic. 90% of the people in our Pre Cana were only Catholic on one side.

---

yes but you have to sign papers saying your children will be raised catholic

---

This is true...but you don't HAVE to raise them catholic...its not like they are gonna send you to Catholic prison...

I know people that just sign it so they can have their ceremony

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Catholic prison... that's hysterical!!!
I totally understand your position. If I was you, I'd speak directly to Pastor Johnson-- don't leave it completely up to the secretary! Be persistant! I had to be with my church (which is still not officially booked) but they at least are 'holding' my date.
Good luck!

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Posted by Nic and Ant

A LONG VENT!

I called a Protestant Church near my FH in Bay Shore to inquire about having our ceromony held there. My parents, who were in a situation simuliar to ours were married there and since they are happy for 17 years (second marriage for both), I was hoping to use the same church as them.

My FH is Catholic and I am Protestant so we definatley cannot get married in his church because a non-Catholic cannot get married in a Catholic Church.

Well to try and shorten the story, I called the Church in Bay Shore and spoke with a receptionist and asked if we could meet with them. She gave us an appointment but later called back and said that she spoke with Pastor Johnson and he said he will NOT marry people who are not members of the church. I WAS SHOCKED!

I do not go to church every wekeend and do not want to push my beliefs on others but it is my understanding that a church is supposed to be the House of God. Who is the Pastor to tell people they are NOT welcome to get married in God's HOUSE! He did not even know my fiance was Catholic and all he knew was that I was not a member of their church. I am insulted! I cannot believe this happened.

Has anybody ran into difficulty with finding a church to marry them? I am so mad about this. I cannot even begin to tell you how much!

Thank for reading, sorry it was so long.

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I am very sorry you have to go through this. But where did you hear that a non catholic cannot get married in a catholic church??? My FH is Protestant also but we ARE getting married in my Catholic church.

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Posted by Nina

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Posted by Soon2BeMrs2006

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Posted by coxmandi

A non Catholic can get married in a Catholic church. My FH is protestant and I'm Catholic. 90% of the people in our Pre Cana were only Catholic on one side.

---

yes but you have to sign papers saying your children will be raised catholic

---

This is true...but you don't HAVE to raise them catholic...its not like they are gonna send you to Catholic prison...

I know people that just sign it so they can have their ceremony

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Nina I love you!! I read this to my mom and she was hysterical.

my FH is catholic and im Lutheran...we are getting married in a Catholic Church....as long as one of you are members I dont understand what his problem is!!!! My FH joined the church and they accepted our request for marriage there...we just cant have a mass bc i can not accept communion in a catholic church since im not catholic

my parents signed the paper to raise us catholic and we were raised lutheran...they will never know....

i suggest finding a new church!!! good luck

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Posted by charliesbride

If you wanna get married in a Catholic CHurch...call St Patricks in Bay Shore...thats were we are getting married and we are both not catholic...so i know for sure they will accept you...

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Really? My FH was baptised, made his communion and was confirmed at St. Patricks. I never knew that St. Patricks - well any Catholic Churches - allowed non catholics to marry at their Churches.

yeah...definately call them..you have to be a member there to get married....the inside of the church is beautiful....

since he was baptized, made him communion and confirmed there they will definately work with you...my FH wasnt a member there but we joined and they liked that he was baptized there and that his parents were married there.....

def make an appt...its worth a try!!!!

Id look around- ive heard that greek orthodox churches are very strict (Im GO) but when I went to my church and told them FH is Catholic they said thats fine and I can get married at my church- so just keep looking youll find a church that allows it....i hope!!!

My FH is not Catholic... and we are getting married in My Catholic Church!

Check it out! But like another poster said... they are going to ask you to raise your kids catholic.

Good Luck!