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A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

Original post by LauraPete

Okay, by now you are probably all asking - what the heck is this girl doing with her wedding 3 WEEKS AWAY?' Excellent question. Don't really have a logical answer unless you accept 'certifiably nuts'. I definitely fell off my rocker a few months ago. Anyway, I am so mortified at my inability to make a decision that I wish I could post this anonymously I but my mug is all over these pictures so that would be difficult!!!

To get serious for a moment, I am going to open up a window into my personal life. Bare with me and I will try to explain from where the real issue stems. I used to be really sick. Sick to the point that I lost all ability to have a healthy self-image. I do not see what others see. Call it body dismorphia or wanting to look like kate moss - whatever. But it has made this process UNBAREABLE to me to the point that I cry myself to sleep at night over a DRESS!!! I cannot believe what this fearing what i will look like for 5 hours of my life has reduced me to. That is why I take so many picture b/c what i see in the mirror is not what is reflected in the camera. I can't stand looking at myself anymore but I can't ignore that I will be on display in 26 days for all to see and comment about and all I can think of is that I would rather wear a toga. I know this sounds horrible and negative and I am bride! I am supposed to be happy! Don't get me wrong, I am elated to no end that I found my soul mate and we will spend eternity together and I love him to death. I just never realized how self-consious I would feel during this entire process. It's not jitters or nerves. It's unfortunately just me.

So, I made light of it in my last post with jokes and calling myself a 'psychobride' (which I am by the way....) but this is where I am pleading for your help. I am sure there are a few out there sort of like me.....

I have added some pics to the ever-increasing 'laurapete dress' album. Just to refresh, the first few pics is the Langer dress, then there is an Amsale, then skip toward the end to see the AnneBarge, and a Vera in that order. There is a marisa with a detachable train somewhere in the middle.

Please take a look and don't hold back about your opinions. Don't feel bad telling me the truth. I need to hear it. Some pics were taken by me in the mirror so they are not as good, some have the veil and flowers, some I am made-up etc...

Here is the link:


LauraPete's Dress Pics Revised
becks23 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I love the styles of the dresses you tried on....what stores did you go dress shopping at?

paulandles912 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I love you in the Anne Barge dress best, but agree you look beautiful in all of them.

Good luck choosing!
JimmysBride Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

First off -- two things:

1. I completely understand where you are coming from with the body image thing and the picture taking, etc

2. All the dresses look beautiful on you because you have a very nice figure and they are all beautiful gowns, so-- no matter which one you finally decide on, you WILL BE a stunning bride.

Now, that said, let me tell you what I think.

I STILL think this is YOUR dress:



The other gowns, while beautiful, don't have any of the drama and wow factor that this gown has. Ever since I first saw the pictures of you in this gown, I've thought this was your dress. It looks perfect on you. And I'll be frank and tell you why the others don't.

The others, for the most part are too plain or don't flatter your figure as much as the first one.

Like I said, you have a lovely figure and this one



Isn't doing anything for it.

Neither is this one because nothing is going on at the top to accentuate your waist & curves.

http://www.liweddings.com/mywedding/album/i/1899.jpg'>

And it is tooooo straight.


This one is drawing attention to your middle in the wrong way. It's hiding your shape for the sake of showing off some pretty detailing...



NOW.... the AMSALE has a little something going on. It completely complements your figure because it's got that gentle sweetheart neckline, detail in the center, but the band seperates and accentuates your curves rather than hiding them...




Anyway, I could go on but these are just my opinions. Ultimately, YOU have to feel beautiful in the gown. I just thought I'd go into some detail as to why I think that first one is YOUR gown.

I just can't say enough how WOW this dress is on you... this IS your dress girl!! Good luck!

groovypeg Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

you look beautiful in every picture!!! i loved all of the dresses. sorry i am not much help!!
BMD'sPeanut Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I'm surprised that I'm the first to suggest that you look into some sort of therapy...

To us, you're very thin and very beautiful...But...

No matter how many pictures you post or how many compliments you get, you are still going to have these issues deep down inside...

(Unless I am totally off base and this simple little posting proves to be a completely freeing experience and you suddenly snap out of whatever negativity you were feeling and turn out to be all better...)

Either way...I wish you health and luck...Body image issues are very serious...I hope you take care of yourself.

FLaCaTaCa Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I think you look great in all of them!!!!!!

My favorite is the AtticaQ Loves! I think you will look amazing in any of the dresses you put on!!!!
JimmysBride Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I just wanted to add (and for some reason I couldn't edit my post) that the reason why I went into so much detail explaining why I like the first one on you best, is because I know that sometimes when you are stuck in the state of mind that you are in right now, the LAST thing you want to hear is 'oooh, they ALL look good on you!' It just doesn't help. I'm not putting anyone down who said that, because it IS absolutely true, but I've been where you are many times, so I think I can empathize. Sometimes it works for me this way.
Ladybug63 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

Definitely the first one. You are stunning!
CubanBride Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

YOU HAVE TO GET THE FIRST ONE! YOU LOOK AMAZING IN IT!

BUT YOU WOULD LOOK FABULOUS IN A POTATO SACK!
Sonicstef Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I cant tell which dress is from which designer but this is my fav. Classic and beautiful but the broach and the detail on the top adds that bit of chic fashion.



But on the whole you have the perfect body for clothing..so you can't go wrong.
eogara Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

LauraPete - You look gorgeous. If you are looking for a dress that will accentuate your incredible figure, I'd go with the Anne Barge. The first one is beautiful as well but I could see how if it doesn't bustle it would be quite annoying for the evening.

It doesn't seem that your illness is all in the past. Maybe continuing whatever treatment you received to make you better back then would be a good thing. I hope I'm not overstepping my boundaries here but I think that this is really really important. You are beautiful but we could all tell you that until we're blue in the face. You need to believe it yourself.

BCTM33 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I know you don't agree, but I think you look wonderful in all the dresses (except the Vera Wang - I just don't like that dress). I don't think you could make a wrong decision among the others. You could wear any of them and be stunning. I voted for the Amsale, I love it! YOu look perfect in it! It has the perfect balance of simplicity and detail and really compliments your body.

I do agree that you should talk with someone if the stress is getting to you that badly. This is your wedding, it should make you happy not miserable. I'm glad you conquered your body problem before, and I'm sorry it seems to be coming back to haunt you. No one here will judge you - we are here to help! Let us know if we can do anything else for you!
DrmnBlnd Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I absolutely LOVE the first dress, and it looks wonderful on you!!!!

EvenEdan Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

First of all let me say that you look AMAZING! You are a beautiful woman in all these dresses. I have to say, I still love your original dress the best. I also love the Amsale detachable train and the Anne Barge dress. I don't care for how the Vera looks, it doesn't accentuate your shape as nicely as some of the others do.
In order of preference, here are my picks, but all three look FANTASTIC on you.


May2004 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

Posted by AtticaQT

I think you look great in the first dress - i love it!!! The back of it sold me on it - You look gorgeous in it!




I agree.
nov2004bride Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

I love this dress on you!! But you look beautiful in all of them
Bebalina Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

hands down the first dress....

ssdare Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

My vote would be for the Amsale or the Anne Barge dresses. As for the Langer dress, I love the back, but I'm not crazy about the wide band look of the front of the dress - but that's just my personal style.

I didn't like the Vera dress - I liked the draping on the upper part of the dress but the rest was just kind of boring.

You will look great in which ever dress you end up selecting!

Good luck.
tina_cuse01 Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

LauraPete, As the other girls have said you look beautiful. But I know that doesn't help you. When I opened your album I said 'WOW'. In that first dress you look stunning. It flatters you in every way possible. I absolutely LOVE the back of the dress and the front has the right neckline and shape for your body. I also have a suggestion for bustling it that might help. A friend of mine had a similiar Ramona Kervesca (sp?) dress. Her bustle was so simple and looked beautiful. It literally was a single button that pulled the train up, it was so simple and still looked beautiful. She had a very intricate back and this didn't take away from it at all and it did the job.

The one I liked the least was the Vera Wang. I actually found that it didn't nothing for you.

Good luck. I will see if I have some pics of my friends bustle.
nylibride Posted:

Re: A Personal Post and Plea for your Help (with link to pics)

You have a very tough decision ahead....b/c you honestly look beautiful in all of these dresses. I know it's easy for people on the outside to say, but I hope you can really see it too.

I love the back of the one dress that you specifically have a picture of the back of it draping. Gorgeous. However, you HONESTLY can NOT go wrong with the choices you have.

good luck. I really hope you do talk with someone who may be able to really make a difference in helping you see yourself more realistically and helping you feel more comfortable in your own skin!

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