Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

ITALIANBELLA Posted: Jul 30, 2008 11:40 PM

Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Sorry for the long vent so my FH and I have found a beaitufil little house to live in queens. We put the bid on the house and they accepted our offer. We are really excited even though we are getting married in october the asking price and everthing was perfect so we are currenly under contract. So we shared tne news with his family and this is for people who dont know his sister planned a wedding two months before us even though we were engaged first. But anyway so now his mother tells me she upsed bc his sister hasnt found a place to live and they saw a house but someone bid higher this was last friday. Now out of nowhere my FH says his sister got the house and is closing in september. I just don't understand it's like she is in compettion or something?? how come everytime we do something she comes right after and does this. i am so fed up with them all of them. I have to learn not to let it bother me so I want to send out save the dates bc we did planned our wedding first and his sister decides to go two months before us. is it too early to send them?? But now my thing is as soon as she sees me send it out she willl sned them out a week later its like get a life already ughhh

littlepixie12 Posted: Jul 30, 2008 11:58 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

I would DEF send them out before her, plus Im sure his family knows that you were engaged first. This is weird to me that someone would do this, because my family is off the boat, as they say, lol and this would be seriously disrespectful to do and the family would gossip. Maybe she is jealous of you?

KimiDanny1010 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 12:31 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

sounds like jealousy !! ... don't let her bug you !!

mdawg Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:47 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

SEND THEM NOW!!! dont tell ANYONE that youre sending them until they've already been sent/received. Cuz she'll probably be like the Penelope character from SNL and be all like 'Oh yeah? Well I sent them telepathically the day he proposed. so HA'

Walkintomymind Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:50 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

I feel like it's a little too soon....but I also think you should send them out first!!! lol....so I'm no help!! I just know that people will get confused and think it's this October if you send them out now......

VickiR510 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:58 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Ahh there will always be people who have issues to get whatever done before someone. In the end she is probably not going to love love love the home she is in & god knows about the wedding! Its like this take from where it comes & be flattered that she wants to do everything you guys are doing. Other wise you will be angry & annoyed all the time & you shouldnt be. BTW, did you ever ask why she decided to do the wedding 2 months before you?? I mean for OOT's sake. Do you really think they will come in 2x??? Thats nuts. I would send out the STD's to your major people soon. Maybe not tell her do it on the down low.

kgicrls Posted: Jul 31, 2008 08:51 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

I think right now it is too soon to send out your std's. I sent mine out at the year mark. I just wouldn't even tell anybody you are sending them. And maybe don't even send one to Fh's parents or fsil so she wont get the urge to send hers out...

Good luck! and sorry you are going through this!

flairforfashion Posted: Jul 31, 2008 10:02 AM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Lord. I hate this kind of crap. We know people just like this and we just laugh at them. In this case, send them out and don't tell. F her and the whole family that's involved in the competition. Why do people have to be like ths? I'll never know!

KARA16 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 12:49 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Posted by flairforfashion

Lord. I hate this kind of crap. We know people just like this and we just laugh at them. In this case, send them out and don't tell. F her and the whole family that's involved in the competition. Why do people have to be like ths? I'll never know!

I agree. I really hate people lthat act like this. GET A LIFE!!!

mls282 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 12:54 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Don't tell anyone send them now!!!!

Good luck with this. It would totally annoy the heck out of me too! Just figure she is jealous and see it as a compliment! LOL!

JJC Posted: Jul 31, 2008 01:44 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Posted by KimiDanny1010

sounds like jealousy !! ... don't let her bug you !!

i agree..dont stoop to her level...letting it bother her makes you just like her! Be the bigger person!

jennaandguy09 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 02:30 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

I totally feel your pain, not long after we asked FSIL's to be in the wedding, they BOTH announced that they're pregnant, talk about trying to steal our thunder!!!! It's all jealousy, forget them, focus on your home and your wedding!!!!!!!!

misswitty Posted: Jul 31, 2008 03:10 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Send them out YESTERDAY!!!!!! I wouldn't share any more news with them - only on a need-to-know basis. Some people are unbelieveable! I wanted to get married this summer, but FH's sister was getting married August 7th, so we pushed it to next summer so it would be easier on everyone. P.S. - Her wedding's OFF!!!! oh well...

CDFT09 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 03:44 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

SEND THEM!!! Try not to let it bother you. Remember 'Immitation is the sincerest form of flattery'. If she sends STDs right after you...consider it a compliment...she liked your idea soooo much, she decided to copy you!!!

missjones2007 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 03:54 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

sounds like haterism to me.

ITALIANBELLA Posted: Jul 31, 2008 04:36 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

it's like the in-laws from hell, and then they try to act fake and be all nice in person. I am just going to ignore them the worst part is they make the excuse that she is older to justify their doings so dumb

lanamanitta Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:02 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

I think you have to make your wedding planning decisions based on what you want and what makes sense, and engaging in what your FSIL has turned into a 'race' is just buying into the competitiveness and allowing her to rush you and dictate when and how you do things.

If she weren't doing this, you'd probably feel that this is too early to send out the STD's (which I sense you do) so go with that feeling and wait until you want to send them with no concern at all about what she's doing or when she does it.

If she sends her STD's out in August, it's fine, her wedding is in August '09. I think if you send yours out in August, it will appear you were trying to beat her to the punch because it is a bit early.

And remember the tortoise and hare . . . . slow and steady wins the 'race' after all!!!

MEL0880 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:16 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Wow! I would send out your stds and not tell a soul! That suckks! I wouldn't share any info either.. But don't let it become a competition its will take all the fun out of planning! Let her be the immature one.. Good luck! And congrats on your house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MrsDtoBe09 Posted: Jul 31, 2008 06:22 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Dont let her get to you... it sounds like thats just what she wants!

TheLadyJ Posted: Aug 01, 2008 12:53 PM

Re: Again with my FSIL and FMIL FIrst the wedding now this

Yep. Please don't let her get to you. This is a happy time in your life - you are getting married and buying a home. These are ALL good things.

Sure, it may seem like she is trying to steal your thunder, but don't let her.

AS for the STD's, I would send them. Due to the close timing between the 2 weddings, people that might be invited to both need to know in advance.

Also - and this may be a little catty, perhaps delay sending one to her or you FMIL for a little bit. That way she doesn't run out and do hers the second yours arrives in the mail. Just say you wanted to give them to them personally because they are so special to you.

but again, don't let her ruin everything.