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AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

wacky Posted:

AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Ok I call fh mom to say thanks for bday card. In 2 minutes the 'me me' syndrome starts.

I told mom it was ok to stay in our apt while we were on honeymoon, no problem. Tonight she wants to know where is she staying before wedding. What????????

She is coming in thursday before wedding and she was wondering if she could stay in our apt. She didnt say it but implied it.

Ok smoke starts

then in same breathe she askes abt RD fine no probelm, now I thought Paul (wimp) explained to his mom that because of scheduling she probably would miss dinner. Well she sounded surprised, now questions.

Do I reschedule dinner part to accomodate her and his sister? or just leave it alone and just take them to dinner alone on Friday before wedding.

Ok then she starts asking how much $$$ can she spend on a dress, because Paul said he would send momey and still hasnt. At that point Paul came home and I gave him hte phone and nothing was resolved

Im F**** ****ed and I dont know who I should be more mad at Sissy Boy or his mom.

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Sorryyyyy Ladies, but thank you

wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

ok 22 people have read this and no one has any input

Sorry ladies but Im going to rip his head off
Suz Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Wacky, I wish I had some kind of great advice, but unfortunately, I don't. I've found that family situations and weddings don't mix well.

Have you spoken with your FH about this situation? Does he have any kind of a reason for not explaining all of this to his mom?

I really feel for you, would be fuming too.

Good luck and I hope it works out well for you.
DrmnBlnd Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

HAHA, wacky you are too funny.

I think the only way to resolve this is to confront your FH about these things. I cannot believe his mom actually wants to stay at your apt before the wedding! Don't people realize that this is when you need the most 'down' time to relax? You don't need to be entertaining someone!

edited to say- I hope things get better soon!
wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Thanks Suz

I am so mad you have no idea

Sissy boy and I jsut had a huge argument, so since he left his nuts somewhere I am preparing a huge list of things that he not I needs to discuss with his mom and his sister.

I will not walk down that aisle until this is resolved

What an ass, Im so mad. Did he honestly think that it would never come up.

MissLinda Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Sorry . .I don't know the history with FMIL but it sounds like you have to talk the bull by the horns and deal with it yourself. .my fh wants nothing to do with arguments between me and his mom I think he should step in but he doesn't so I wind up being the bad guy but hey that's life. I don't know why some men have a problem going up against their mothers. Does he agree with you in the decisions that you have made and doesn't want to stand up to his mom or is he neutral about everything? If he is neutral are plans finalize for Rehersal dinner maybe you can accomodate her I know it's your wedding but sometimes we have to bend for the sake of peace. good luck!
Suz Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

The list sounds like a good idea.

That way you can make sure to tell him everything that's bothering you and get it all off your chest at once.

Its better than remembering something later and having another fight. I've had a little experience with that.
MissLinda Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

by the way I would NOT let her stay with you before the wedding . . you might wind up ripping all their heads off . . lol
wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Thanks MissLinda

Men **** right now.

I dont mind changing the RD but I will then incovenience 10 people by asking them to give up 2nights for us.

Anyway he thinks if he stays out of it, then by some miracle of GOD it will be fixed

Well dumbass has not seen the crazy split personality crazy italian woman yet.

I will play his game and I will win.

AGHHHHHHHHHHH
dubliner Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Ok - one thing at a time - deep breaths, and a glass of wine !! here's to start

When is the RD. Why can't she be here for it. I think she should be included - JMO

About the dress - did you agree to pay for a dress? did your Fh and not mention it to you? I know you don't need this headache, but can you resolve it if FH can't. I think FH needs to put his mom in her place, and stand up to her.

MissLinda Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Of course he thinks it'll be a miracle and it will be solve on it's own because you're his miracle and problem solver. . . I hope you win the battle. . I never will!
dubliner Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Ok I rushed in when I saw you pull us for not responding, but I agree with Miss Linda.

However, if you take the matter into your own hands, she may always remind you of how 'she was treated before the wedding - they wouldn't let me stay with them - etc...' Are you ok with that?
cw0904 Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

((HUGS)))) I think the list is a great idea. Everything needs to be brought out before it gets worse. Good Luck Hun

Forgot to add: did you plan on staying in the apt before the wedding? If so, does she have family she can stay with? I know it will be a nerve wracking time for you let alone having her in your vicinity before the big day. So is there a way it can be said to her in a nice, and kind manner?

If you are not staying in the apt on the wedding day, I say take it for all its worth. Go to where you planned on going to earlier than you had planned. You don't want any more stress than you already have.
michele31 Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

I think you and your FH need to have a calm heart to heart. He needs to begin to discuss things with you such as sending his mom money. I think this situation needs to get worked out sooner rather than later. Sorry she doesn't seem to respect any boundries.

wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Dubliner, Thanks

I want his mom there but is it ok
to have the rehearsal part on June 6 without his mom and the dinner on Fri June 20th? I dont want to put the whole BP out on both nights.

The dress thing Im ****ed abt because he told me he was sending check and he still hasnt, that was a month ago

And 3rd there is no way she is staying with us in our little 1 bedroom apt.

But although Im annoyed at no balls Im ****ed at his mom also, she has 2 daughters and another son, so I dont know why htey cant help her out also.

What do you think?
wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

MissLinda I know see what happens when you spoil the *******s
jpsgirl Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

it's tough, the FMIL thing. Mine came TEN DAYS before the wedding and stayed with us the whole time. I thought it was going to be terrible, because she is weird (and for all those who remember, she got stoned, yes stoned, and ATE STUFF out of my HOTEL BASKETS) but it wasn't as bad as I thought, she was very helpful doing all our laundry and cleaning the house, etc. of course, it went down hill when she got falling down drunk at the bar we met friends at the night before the wedding, but I digress. I don't know about your FMIL, is your FH an only child, or the first to get married? try to understand that it's important to her too, and that she doesn't want to miss the RD, etc. The bottom line is, you love your FH, without her he wouldn't be here, etc....I know what helped me was looking at my own family and realizing he wasn't getting any bargain either, but this may not be the case with you. All in all, try to relax and let things roll off of your back a little more. Me and FH had some doozies while wedding planning, and I really wish I didn't have those memories to think back on. In the end, the arguing didn't change the end result. Good luck, hang in there. This is a great time in your life, it's so important to enjoy it as much as you possibly can!

cw0904 Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Where do your FH's siblings live? If they live in LI I would suggest he talk to one of them and see if they can take her in before the wedding.
That isn't really fair for your or your FH to have another body in your apt before your big day.
Honestly, I would be ****ed if what I wrote above was the case too.
wacky Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

Thanks ladies for the input.

Im just really ****ed, which is not like me I usually make light of things.

But right now I want him out of my sight. Im going to stop wedding planning for a while, he better shape up or Im out.

Im sick of this ****, he has a big mouth with me but he cant talk to his mom

BS, Im done

Ciao ladies
jennbaby Posted:

Re: AGHHHHHHHH FMIL and FH **** me off

JPSGIRL I remember LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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