Am I wrong?

Having a little issue with MIL today.

She calls me and asks me what our plans are for the weekends in December. She has an idea for a Christmas present and wanted to know our availability in December because she had to make the 'reservations' I had a hunch that it was tickets to the Radio City show -- a show that we have repeatedly said to her that we didn't have any interest in seeing because:

1. it's geared for families, particularly kids
2. the next time we want to see it is when we have a child
3. tix are alot of money and for the same price you can see a broadway show and the broadway show is longer

And I guessed right and she pushed back and said what do I care if it's not something I wanted if I'm not paying for it --that I should be appreciative of the thought. She said, how do you know you don't like it if you haven't seen it. I did see it, when i was a kid.

So I said, if you want to get us something with a christmas theme, get us nutcracker tix, we always wanted to see that, or tix to a show for sometime next year, like dracula or wicked, as we had asked. She said no to nutcracker cuz it's boring and i won't like ballet. I said so because you like something, I should like it too. I then said if she gets us radio city tix, i'll sell them. Now she's hurt because I 'ruined her idea'

She got me with a ziner and said that my parents buy us plenty of things that we complain about and don't want but we still take them.

Happy Friday

No your not wrong!! Your MIL sounds like my mom. Lucky for me, I know how to deal with her. Point in case, I would have yes'd her to death to stroke her ego and give her the illusion that yes indeed it is by far the best gift idea ever conceived for the holiday season. But I simply would have made a night out of it, gone to the city, sold the tickets and spent the money on a wonderful night on the town. The next morning when she would call to ask how the show is I would merely say 'Words cant describe what a wonderful night it was!!'
Know that you cant win in arguements like this and that you just have to make the best of it. I wish you good luck and enjoy the coal she's going to put in your stocking!!

Seems kinda strange that she is forcing a gift on you that you've clearly told her thanks, but not interested.

Well, I am a little biased because ever since I gave my bridesmaids earrings as ONE of their bridal party gifts (because I wanted them to wear them on the day of my wedding), one of the girls IMMEDIATELY started to complain about them when she opened the box and never did thank me for ANY of the gifts that I gave her...

So, now I am from the school of thought that...

It's a GIFT...if you don't like it, too bad!

(But, for the holidays, birthdays, etc. I try REALLY hard to give gifts that people will enjoy)

Well you do realize that you cannot win - , right?

But anyhow, I totally agree with you. It it were me, I would also definitely tell someone that I would prefer tickets to something else if the subject arose. THe subject has even come up with my MIL , but at least she did ask what Anthony and I were interested in seeing if she does wind up getting us theater tickets. We gave her a few shows we are interested in .

Personally, if someone told me that they wouldn't like the tickets I was planning on gettign them, I'd definitely get them something else! Why waste my money on tix they are going to hate???

While I do believe in most cases 'its the thought that counts' , this is a little different. You cannot 'return' a gift like show tickets as you would a shirt or tie. I kinda think your MIL is being a little unreasonable

And not that you asked -- but I agree 100% about the Radio City show. Its my least favorite show in all of NYC. Really , nce you've seen it 1x, you can wait a lifetime to see it again .. it never changes. Better to watch it again when it'll be the first time with your future son/daughter. I would so try to HIGHLY PERSUADE anyone who was thinking of getting me tix to that show to save their $$

The only thing that I think you are wrong about is wanting to see Dracula. It is just awful.

Maybe your MIL will understand your position in a few days. She probably put a lot of thought into that idea and was more hurt over your reaction then anything. Hopefully in a few hours/days she will understand that you were just being honest and not trying to be ungrateful.

That's a hard one, it's not like an ugly sweater you can put in the back of the closet. Why is she insisting you go to this show when you are so adament about not wanting to? That's what makes this bizarre. So, no I don't think you are wrong here. You are telling her nicely that you are not interested in this particular gift and giving her alternatives prior to her buying the gift.


Felicia ~ I feel the same way about the show. It's good for tourists that want to 'experience' the holidays and Radio City all in one but it would take a whole lot for me to go again.

I don't think you're wrong at all.

You're not disagreeing with the idea of tickets - just tickets to a particular show (which I agree with - if you've seen it once you did your lifetime quota )

If your MIL does get you Radio City tix, just sell them and see what you really want to see.

---

Posted by ChristineC68

That's a hard one, it's not like an ugly sweater you can put in the back of the closet. Why is she insisting you go to this show when you are so adament about not wanting to? That's what makes this bizarre. So, no I don't think you are wrong here. You are telling her nicely that you are not interested in this particular gift and giving her alternatives prior to her buying the gift.


Felicia ~ I feel the same way about the show. It's good for tourists that want to 'experience' the holidays and Radio City all in one but it would take a whole lot for me to go again.

---

I have to disagree with the two of you. DH went last year for the first time and loved it so much that we are going again this year. It is going to be a yearly tradition with us and also when we have children.

I just thought of something -

are the tickets just for you two? Or is your MIL planning a family outing? Everyone's getting it as a gift...

Maybe that's why she's getting so upset?

---

Posted by heidla

The only thing that I think you are wrong about is wanting to see Dracula. It is just awful.

---

it would be just for us

and suven, if she had given it to me as a surprise, i would graciously take them and not complain

the only reason i'm saying something now is that the gift has not been bought yet

---

Posted by don424

it would be just for us

and suven, if she had given it to me as a surprise, i would graciously take them and not complain

the only reason i'm saying something now is that the gift has not been bought yet

---

Ah HAH! Good point...

It almost sounds like she's getting them as a freebie or something and wants to pawn them off.

---

Posted by suven

---

Posted by don424

it would be just for us

and suven, if she had given it to me as a surprise, i would graciously take them and not complain

the only reason i'm saying something now is that the gift has not been bought yet

---

Ah HAH! Good point...

---

my feeling is that the gift has not been bought so why should she waste it on something we don't want