so i'm most likely doing my hair half up half down. now 2 of my bridesmaids (yes i know you're looking at this meish) want to do their hair half up half down. am i wrong for telling them absolutely no? i want to be the only one with that hair style. its really upsetting me.
PreshusSmurf
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Re: am i wrong??
To be completely honest, I never understood why this bothers some brides. But I know that it does ....
I dont think anyone will be confused about who the bride is, even if your hair is similar.
kellybean
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Re: am i wrong??
I dont think so ...mine will be half up half down....the bm will all be up,...I dont care what kind of up do but it will be up....its your day !!
karabara
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Re: am i wrong??
i think you should have the BMs hair different from yours if that is what you want. they should understand
kslmbuggie
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Re: am i wrong??
it is being a bit bridezilla-e, but it is your day so u can do whatever you like....as long as it isnt the exact same style I wouldnt mind it.
missliss
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Re: am i wrong??
Ok, since you asked, yes. Me personally, I think that's a little overboard. You're the bride. No one is going to compare you with your BMs if you have the same hairdo. You'll be in the white dress w/the veil, clear distinction. No one will even be looking at their hair enough to notice, they'll be fawning over you. I think with all the other things we have to worry about, this isn't one of them. You will all look beautiful, but you'll still be the star of the show.
BunnyBride
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Re: am i wrong??
Posted by missliss
Ok, since you asked, yes. Me personally, I think that's a little overboard. You're the bride. No one is going to compare you with your BMs if you have the same hairdo. You'll be in the white dress w/the veil, clear distinction. No one will even be looking at their hair enough to notice, they'll be fawning over you. I think with all the other things we have to worry about, this isn't one of them. You will all look beautiful, but you'll still be the star of the show.
I have to agree...everyone will know you're the bride and your gonna shine no matter what. Try not to get hung up on the little things..I know it's hard but trust me..in the end how your bridemaids had their hair that day won't matter to you.
iwannabmrsD
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Re: am i wrong??
i say no.. it's u'r day do what will make u comfortable.. i've told my bms' that i'm not requiring trips to the hair salon, or making any requiremet other than i want to be the only one with my hair up.... and i told them no big hair.. my girls like big ignorant hair.. so i told them a nice wrap, some barrel curls, a half up half down.. a bob.. but not all up.. and not big..
XFINALLYX
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i know that people wont mistake them for me, its just the way i always wanted it. i have been so great with the girls for everything. i even picked out a 50 dollar dress for them so it wouldnt be expensive over the 170 dollar one that i wanted. i havent been picky about shoes, or if they should do makeup or not. i just dont understand. the one girl is saying 'fine im not getting anyone to do my hair then' shes so selfish. uggh :(
Mrs. V 2008
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to be honest i wouldn't care...
smplynluv
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I say do what you want. They are your bm and you get to dress them up your way lol I would be fine with it.
Butterfly123
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Youre not wrong. If you want their hair a certain way then thats the way it should be. Just tell them you want all their hair the same way. And you want them in an updo.
MJDoc12
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gotta say---i always found it a little BZ to tell girls how to get their hair done for the wedding. they are spending enough moolah with the dresses, shoes, hair, makeup, etc--and then to be told what hairstyle?!
i'm on the side with the BMs on this one.
ETA: let me just add--as a bride who has already been there and had my day....this is one of those 'details' that once the day is over, you will realize it wasn't that important at all.
DrWho
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Re: am i wrong??
All of my girls asked me how I wanted their hair done. I would never consider telling them how they had to wear their hair, but I guess it's a normal thing to do, since they all seemed to expect it. I've even had 3 of them ask my permission to get a haircut, which is one of the strangest questions I've ever been asked. You're a grown woman! Manage your own head!
Kara and Todd
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Re: am i wrong??
I think it's not at all worth getting upset about. No one is going to mistake the BMs for the brides -- and I'm sure several guests will wind up wearing their hair half up / half down, too...
However, you can mention it to them if you want. I was asked by my BMs how I wanted their hair, and I told them they could do it however they wanted it. They all managed to choose half up / half down. (Well except one with short hair!)
See how they react if you ask them to wear their hair differently... In the grand scheme of things, it's a very small thing to worry about.
XFINALLYX
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Re: am i wrong??
first of all, you are being a lil rude saying im a grown woman, blah blah blah..
2nd of all i never told them how to do their hair, i told them what NOT to do which is the same style as me. there are a million different hair styles out there, they couldnt choose anything other than the one that i am using? i know people wont mistake other people for me, but its what i want. and i think im entitled to that. i dont think i should be giving s*it from them about that nor my bachelorette party. i think i have the worlds worst bridal party ever except for like 2 of them.
DCLM726
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Posted by XFINALLYX
i know that people wont mistake them for me, its just the way i always wanted it. i have been so great with the girls for everything. i even picked out a 50 dollar dress for them so it wouldnt be expensive over the 170 dollar one that i wanted. i havent been picky about shoes, or if they should do makeup or not. i just dont understand. the one girl is saying 'fine im not getting anyone to do my hair then' shes so selfish. uggh :(
I dont think shes being selfish JMO. She probably was just upset and reacting like that. Even though its your day you want to make your girls feel comfortable. I normally wear my hair up or half up and down. I have hair past my shoulders and it annoys me when its all down. If I was in a wedding and told by the bride that I had to have my hair a certain way that I might not normally wear, I would be annoyed and uncomfortable all day/night.
I would talk to all of the girls and see how they all feel about this. Again, this is just my opinion!
MJDoc12
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Re: am i wrong??
Posted by XFINALLYX
first of all, you are being a lil rude saying im a grown woman, blah blah blah..
2nd of all i never told them how to do their hair, i told them what NOT to do which is the same style as me. there are a million different hair styles out there, they couldnt choose anything other than the one that i am using? i know people wont mistake other people for me, but its what i want. and i think im entitled to that. i dont think i should be giving s*it from them about that nor my bachelorette party. i think i have the worlds worst bridal party ever except for like 2 of them.
sorry that this is upsetting you---but you asked a question and ppl were just giving an answer.
by telling them a style they are NOT allowed to wear, you are kind of telling them how to do their hair. 1/2 up 1/2 down is a very very popular hair style for formal affairs....its quite flattering to any hair/face type. so by saying they have to have it either all down or all up---yeah you are sort of telling them how to do their hair.
however it sounds like there is more going on with your BP than just the hair issue---you seem like you are rather annoyed or upset at them in general. can you perhaps speak with them and try and resolve things before the big day?
ETA: and the poster who made the 'grown woman' women was referring to one of her BMs asking if it was okay to get a haircut and she was jokingly referring to HER bm and saying 'grown woman, manage your own head'
FuTuRe MrS MaZz
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You asked for opinions and you are getting them... I think you are sweating the small stuff! Personally, if my girls all wanted to do their hair the same way as me, I wouldnt care... I dont think it is a big deal... Others are right, you are still the bride and everyone will know this regardless
I wish you lots of luck on your wedding day when the lil 'mistakes' start popping up... Rem to just brush it off... No one is going to really care or notice that you are the only one with a certain hairstyle!
HelenZ
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Re: am i wrong??
Posted by XFINALLYX
first of all, you are being a lil rude saying im a grown woman, blah blah blah..
2nd of all i never told them how to do their hair, i told them what NOT to do which is the same style as me. there are a million different hair styles out there, they couldnt choose anything other than the one that i am using? i know people wont mistake other people for me, but its what i want. and i think im entitled to that. i dont think i should be giving s*it from them about that nor my bachelorette party. i think i have the worlds worst bridal party ever except for like 2 of them.
hello!! just adding my 2 cents....but I think the other LIWer (drwho) was talking about her BM's (referring to them asking permission from her to get a hair cut).
anyhoo....I can understand that you've pictured your hair to be a certain way, and your BM's to be different, but perhaps you should ask your BM's for a picture of what they had in mind? it might have a different look then yours anyway. My BM's had asked how their hair should be and I told them I don't care as long as its not all down (b/c the majority of them have long hair). good luck!! but try not to let this stress you out too much!!
