Anyone else worried that a family member might ruin their day?

I'm hoping unwanted guest don't try to make an appearance!

my little cousins drink all the time...

they are 22, 21, 17

the 17 yr old and her 21 yr old sister i am MOST worried about...

ive learned to try to get over it... and realize that we will tell the BM if anyone gets out of hand to ask them to go home...

they will embrass themself.. NOT me.

wow i didnt know we were sisters!!

seriously, my mom when she sees my dress all she sees are WRINKLES

i swear, after we go for fittings she calls up her sisters in Italy and says the Italian word for wrinkles AT LEAST 400 times it sounds like this 'wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle'

hello it is a SILK dress idk what she thinks it is supposed to look like, she is a seamstress and MAKES dresses SHE should have known it would look like that but of course this is just ANOTHER reason i should have listened to her and gotten a dress entirely made of tulle - which i would have LOVED to find myself but i didnt find any i liked in America

anyway, I have already alerted a few people - Oksana and Jenn know to keep her away from me and my sister has to keep her away from me - you need to get someone to help you for that day

and it will get WORSE not better on that day, sorry to say.

my mom's first words to my sister AND brother were COMPLAINTS ( i mean literally as they walked out of the church she complained to them after being married for about one minute )

Im worried about my brother drinking too much and dancing on the chair like he does at EVERY wedding. People cheer him on but than criticize afterwards....lol!

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Posted by jenlen

My mom is one of those overly critical to the point of being offensive type women. She's like that because she cares and wants the very best for me...but sometimes it's too much to deal with. So far, she's called me multiple times to tell me what she doesn't like about my dress (too long) , my veil (too long), my hair (too weird and old looking, should do half down like all the other brides), my makeup, my flowers (too small compared to the bridesmaids' bouquets), etc.

She just can't help herself even when i tell her it upsets me. She'll repeat all her comments. I know if she does it the day of, i'll be so pissed, even if i try to not let it affect me.

Anyone else worried about something like this?

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my mom is the same way!

while your mom might be making these comments now I would think the day of the wedding she will just be so happy for you that all those little nitpicky things she didnt like wont even matter to her.

but i think its normal for people to worry about someone or something ruining their day. i'm worried that people are going to turn their nose up about the fact that i'm not having my wedding at a regular RH

Yeah I worry about my dad being out of control on the wedding day. When there's a big event going on, he gets very anxious, and the littlest thing sets him off where he starts screaming and going nuts. He loves getting attention and wants everything to be about him. He acts as if whatever goes on at the wedding will be a reflection of him, and he's all worried what people will think. Meanwhile, I would think that most guests would realize that the bride and groom (well mostly bride), do most of the planning, so it should reflect more on them.

My whole thing is I try not to think about his potential outbreak nor let it get to me. Knowing he can get crazy about things, I try to avoid discussing a lot of details of the wedding with him. It's hard cause you get excited about planning a wedding and want to share the news with everyone, but I'd say maybe avoiding certain topics with people who you know can be over the top or critical could at least help in giving you peace of mind for now.

Also, there's almost no way to avoid these people potentially ruining the day. It's hard to plan for it and come up with a solution cause you never know what they will exactly do. But if possible, tell someone you know how you're feeling about what this person might do and get them to keep that person occupied/keep on eye on them throughout your wedding.

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Posted by ant n tilde

wow i didnt know we were sisters!!

seriously, my mom when she sees my dress all she sees are WRINKLES

i swear, after we go for fittings she calls up her sisters in Italy and says the Italian word for wrinkles AT LEAST 400 times it sounds like this 'wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle'

hello it is a SILK dress idk what she thinks it is supposed to look like, she is a seamstress and MAKES dresses SHE should have known it would look like that but of course this is just ANOTHER reason i should have listened to her and gotten a dress entirely made of tulle - which i would have LOVED to find myself but i didnt find any i liked in America

anyway, I have already alerted a few people - Oksana and Jenn know to keep her away from me and my sister has to keep her away from me - you need to get someone to help you for that day

and it will get WORSE not better on that day, sorry to say.

my mom's first words to my sister AND brother were COMPLAINTS ( i mean literally as they walked out of the church she complained to them after being married for about one minute )

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hahaha omg Matilde, we ARE sisters. I brought my mom with me to my hair trial so that she can feel involved. I had pre-warned the hair person so she wouldn't get freaked out. But the hair person tried about 10 different updo styles on me because I didn't know exactly what I wanted...I just knew I wanted it up. But my mom had something to say about EACH one. And my mom also really wants me to wear my hair half down because she said that is what everyone else is doing. So after each hairstyle, my mom would ask the hair person, 'don't you think she would look better with her hair half down? I think it would look nicer'

Then she insisted on going with my dad and I to look at wedding bands. If I happened to point out a ring that she didn't like, she would be like 'NO NO NO...don't try that one on...it's SO ugly'. Like in ENGLISH in front of the sales lady. I kept telling her that if she was going to be rude, to at least do it in Taiwanese. At the end I picked the ring that I liked, but even after we put down the deposit and walked out, she kept complaining about it and about why I didn't choose the ring SHE liked.

I'm going to have to get my sister to keep her away from me. My other bridesmaid is deathly afraid of my mom, so she won't do it. hahahaha.

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Posted by jenlen

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Posted by ant n tilde

wow i didnt know we were sisters!!

seriously, my mom when she sees my dress all she sees are WRINKLES

i swear, after we go for fittings she calls up her sisters in Italy and says the Italian word for wrinkles AT LEAST 400 times it sounds like this 'wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle, wrinkle'

hello it is a SILK dress idk what she thinks it is supposed to look like, she is a seamstress and MAKES dresses SHE should have known it would look like that but of course this is just ANOTHER reason i should have listened to her and gotten a dress entirely made of tulle - which i would have LOVED to find myself but i didnt find any i liked in America

anyway, I have already alerted a few people - Oksana and Jenn know to keep her away from me and my sister has to keep her away from me - you need to get someone to help you for that day

and it will get WORSE not better on that day, sorry to say.

my mom's first words to my sister AND brother were COMPLAINTS ( i mean literally as they walked out of the church she complained to them after being married for about one minute )

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hahaha omg Matilde, we ARE sisters. I brought my mom with me to my hair trial so that she can feel involved. I had pre-warned the hair person so she wouldn't get freaked out. But the hair person tried about 10 different updo styles on me because I didn't know exactly what I wanted...I just knew I wanted it up. But my mom had something to say about EACH one. And my mom also really wants me to wear my hair half down because she said that is what everyone else is doing. So after each hairstyle, my mom would ask the hair person, 'don't you think she would look better with her hair half down? I think it would look nicer'

Then she insisted on going with my dad and I to look at wedding bands. If I happened to point out a ring that she didn't like, she would be like 'NO NO NO...don't try that one on...it's SO ugly'. Like in ENGLISH in front of the sales lady. I kept telling her that if she was going to be rude, to at least do it in Taiwanese. At the end I picked the ring that I liked, but even after we put down the deposit and walked out, she kept complaining about it and about why I didn't choose the ring SHE liked.

I'm going to have to get my sister to keep her away from me. My other bridesmaid is deathly afraid of my mom, so she won't do it. hahahaha.

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i really wish i could say that on your wedding day she will be joyous and supportive but i would not be telling the truth!!

My mom to my brother, the MINUTE we got into the limo: 'Why did Dan walk me down the aisle? Why didn't my nephew walk me down? You know in Italy the son walks his mother down the aisle and then walks to the altar not some RANDOM guy' then, she starts TEARING UP!!! like CRYING!! I freaked out and I was like 'MA if you dont shut up right now I am going to make a HUGE scene right here in front of all these people' so she shut up for like a minute but then continued on in Italian for the rest of the night

My mom to my sister, moments after the ceremony: 'I still wish you would have had a REAL wedding (meaning in a Church) I guess this was pretty and all, but that guy wasnt even a priest' um hello, her husband wasnt catholic what would you like them to do?!

HA HA and funny about your hair. . . my mom is always like 'isnt that what people do, dont you want to do it this way'

forget it, i told her i wasnt having a bo-k toss/ garter toss and she was like THAT IS WHAT PEOPLE DO!!

i feel your pain sis!

I am worried about several things-

-people will bring their kids even though we said no children
- that my great aunt will be pushy and get into a fight with FH
- that my MoH won't be able to make it to the wedding (she'll have a three month old at the time- preggers atm)

yep..

1. my sister who still hasn't confirmed if she's coming.. she's a bridesmaid

2. my grandmother who has threatened to boycott if i don't allow my grandfathr to walk me down the aisle instead of my brother

3. my mom who feels strongly that my grandfather should be allowed to walk me down the aisle..

4. my cousin who has requestd that he NOT be seated at a table with his brother.. and if he is, he has informed me that he is NOT responsible for any altercations that break out

5. fh's cousins who are upset that he didn't invite their mom who has been divorced from his uncle since he was 2. he doesn't even know the lady.

6. my grandmother (again) whi cant understand why its so hard for me to wear something with sleeves.. (my dress is strapless)

I'm sorry that you're feeling this way.

I'm not worried about my mom or FMIL ruining anything. They are both wonderful. But I am however, very worried about my crazy, obnoxious, loud, controlling aunt ruining my day. Her daughter is my JR BM and she has made a nasty comment about everything I have shared so far. I was told her daughter doesnt like the color of the dress, the dress itself, the fact she has to wear her hair up, that i want her to wear straps on her dress (she's 12). She's complained about everything and have given me problems with everything. Most of my family isnt coming to my wedding because I invited my aunt and put her daughter in my wedding.

So, i understand your feelings. I guess we just need to do our best, to not let them ruin our day!!!!

my father's wife - - - she drinks...she's loud...and she hates me......so I guess the odds are completely against me