Are you getting a prenup? what do you think of them?

---

Posted by portjeffbride

---

Posted by rojerono

I have investments and some real property left to me by my mother. My attorney advised me that I should ask FH to sign a pre-nuptual agreement that had him acknowledge that he would leave the relationship with what he came in with.

I would NEVER make him sign such a document. We share 2 children and those boys are the most valuable thing to both of us. If we were to ever go our seperate ways I would want us to do so as complete equals.

What is mine is also his. It is as simple as that.

---

well said!

the lawyers may not like it, but family is more important than $...... the union is more important than the assets. The only people who should get prenups are folks like the trumps (where I'm suspicious of the genuine love he really has had for each of his dozen trophy wives... and likewise with the wives and their love of him...)

---

A prenup, like counseling, would never work if you make someone do it!

BUT...

there are alot of ppl out there who do it out of love, and theres nothing wrong with that.

---

Posted by portjeffbride

---

Posted by rojerono

I have investments and some real property left to me by my mother. My attorney advised me that I should ask FH to sign a pre-nuptual agreement that had him acknowledge that he would leave the relationship with what he came in with.

I would NEVER make him sign such a document. We share 2 children and those boys are the most valuable thing to both of us. If we were to ever go our seperate ways I would want us to do so as complete equals.

What is mine is also his. It is as simple as that.

---

well said!

the lawyers may not like it, but family is more important than $...... the union is more important than the assets. The only people who should get prenups are folks like the trumps (where I'm suspicious of the genuine love he really has had for each of his dozen trophy wives... and likewise with the wives and their love of him...)

---

Thats a really cute idea. Too bad when a marriage goes bad and people end up filing for divorce you see their true colors. Divorces get ugly most of the time. You cannot expect someone to be completely fair when their emotions get involved. The one emotionally hurt ends up trying to hurt the other financially. It's not right, but sadly thats what happens. A prenup is one of the only ways to protect yourself should the unthinkable happen. JMO

This is def. personal, but I will give my take on it because I have seen this happen to a very good friend of mine.

Not one of us can say 'We will never get divorced', 'If we get divorced, we have agreed I don't want anything from him and vice versa'. In a perfect world, that would be fantastic! Things can happen, life can change people and it's morbid to think about that stuff I know, but look at everyday life and you see people around you and say 'Holy crap they were so happy' or 'How could she have done that to him'

It's a personal choice by far, but it's something to discuss if you are going into the marriage with salary, 401K, Real Estate, etc.. if you build from scratch together as a union, then yes by far 50/50.

pren up?? no way for me...
I don't like the idea of thinink I am getting a divorce

---

Posted by Summer07Bride

We are not doing a pre-nup. We are right out of college and poor.

---

We too

---

Posted by Lucky0510

---

Posted by portjeffbride

---

Posted by rojerono

I have investments and some real property left to me by my mother. My attorney advised me that I should ask FH to sign a pre-nuptual agreement that had him acknowledge that he would leave the relationship with what he came in with.

I would NEVER make him sign such a document. We share 2 children and those boys are the most valuable thing to both of us. If we were to ever go our seperate ways I would want us to do so as complete equals.

What is mine is also his. It is as simple as that.

---

well said!

the lawyers may not like it, but family is more important than $...... the union is more important than the assets. The only people who should get prenups are folks like the trumps (where I'm suspicious of the genuine love he really has had for each of his dozen trophy wives... and likewise with the wives and their love of him...)

---

Thats a really cute idea. Too bad when a marriage goes bad and people end up filing for divorce you see their true colors. Divorces get ugly most of the time. You cannot expect someone to be completely fair when their emotions get involved. The one emotionally hurt ends up trying to hurt the other financially. It's not right, but sadly thats what happens. A prenup is one of the only ways to protect yourself should the unthinkable happen. JMO

---

from my perspective, it's not a cute or quaint idea... trust and hope for the future is basically the foundation of the union.... both spiritual and emotional... All relationships have great risks, hardships, and traumas.... and produce great wealth, in a monetary, familial (children), and emotional sense... and if you enter the union with an escape hatch, a life preserver, and a sense of his vs hers, you'll be more likely to use those tools. From my perspective, divorce should be made as difficult as humanly possible, with all the raw emotions and instability ripe for the picking.... in order to promote its use only as a very last resort. JMO....

---

Posted by portjeffbride

---

Posted by Lucky0510

---

Posted by portjeffbride

---

Posted by rojerono

I have investments and some real property left to me by my mother. My attorney advised me that I should ask FH to sign a pre-nuptual agreement that had him acknowledge that he would leave the relationship with what he came in with.

I would NEVER make him sign such a document. We share 2 children and those boys are the most valuable thing to both of us. If we were to ever go our seperate ways I would want us to do so as complete equals.

What is mine is also his. It is as simple as that.

---

well said!

the lawyers may not like it, but family is more important than $...... the union is more important than the assets. The only people who should get prenups are folks like the trumps (where I'm suspicious of the genuine love he really has had for each of his dozen trophy wives... and likewise with the wives and their love of him...)

---

Thats a really cute idea. Too bad when a marriage goes bad and people end up filing for divorce you see their true colors. Divorces get ugly most of the time. You cannot expect someone to be completely fair when their emotions get involved. The one emotionally hurt ends up trying to hurt the other financially. It's not right, but sadly thats what happens. A prenup is one of the only ways to protect yourself should the unthinkable happen. JMO

---

from my perspective, it's not a cute or quaint idea... trust and hope for the future is basically the foundation of the union.... both spiritual and emotional... All relationships have great risks, hardships, and traumas.... and produce great wealth, in a monetary, familial (children), and emotional sense... and if you enter the union with an escape hatch, a life preserver, and a sense of his vs hers, you'll be more likely to use those tools. From my perspective, divorce should be made as difficult as humanly possible, with all the raw emotions and instability ripe for the picking.... in order to promote its use only as a very last resort. JMO....

---

Divorce is hard enough. I don't think any of us are looking to get married with the idea that we will end up divorced. If that was the case I would hope we would have enough sense not to go through with the wedding.

Going into a marriage you would think that you have proven to each other that you are in it FOR BETTER OR WORSE. If you think he is going to bail on you when things get hard... the last thing you should do is try to trap him by making him feel like he has no options. With a prenup you and him have more protection... just in case. It's not a plan for failure. It's a guarantee of yours and his future no matter what happens. If you live happily ever after.. .that's wonderful. If not, it gives you the tools you need to move on. The last thing anyone needs to do is make it anymore difficult to escape a marriage that isn't going to work. JMO

Is it a good idea? Yup.

Would I ever sign one? No way. Never.

And, for the record, I *am* an attorney.

No prenup for us because we live in NJ and there unfortunately, EVERYTHING gets split straight down the middle in a divorce. I mean you can try to fight it of course, but bacially they feel you're a partnership and so should share the benefits and BILLS! So no prenup is necessary because lol neither of us has much right now anway and unless we move to a diff state, we'd have to share our stuff anyway.

So prenup doesn't do us Jersey folk any good. However, if I was Brittney Spheres and marrying K-Fed......

(Playing devil's advocate) Well, even though we won't be signing one (and wouldn't!), not having any significant assets NOW is NOT a really great reason not to sign one.

The point of a prenup is to plan for what might happen and what you might acquire in the future -- to plan for any assets you acquire, children you may have, etc. It's not just about protecting what you have now; it's having a plan for later down the road in the event you wind up divorcing.

Like I said, I'm NOT signing one and I wouldn't (neither would FH) -- but there are reasons to sign them even if you have nothing now.