arguing all the time

Maybe it is just me and my FH, but is anyone else arguing about every wedding related issue lately, I sick of it..........Anyone else out there

Re: arguing all the time

Are you arguing about little stuff? Maybe you guys could sit down and talk. Do you think that something is bothering him.

Re: arguing all the time

Re: arguing all the time

I know I keep freaking out every 2 weeks or so about the finances. Other than that, we argue just the same as before we were engaged.

Re: arguing all the time

I'm not arguing only because for the most part, he doesn't care about the wedding in terms of the details. And my family is footing most of the bill, so he's respectfully agreeing to most decisions. BUT, he did say to me a few weeks ago 'What happened to our conversation? We used to be able to talk about different things. Now all you ever talk about is the wedding.' If the wedding is the main topic of conversation between you and FI, he may argue about stuff rather than just say 'I'm sick of talking about the wedding.' Communication is key. And I have learned to PICK MY BATTLES. Life is stressful enough without arguing over favors, flowers, and fluff. I hope things get better.

Re: arguing all the time

No its not just you. FH and I went to meet with the photographer and DJ today and the whole time he argued with me and he seemed to get most annoyed when money was discussed. It seems lately thats all we argue about....$$$$$.

Him and I are paying for the entire wedding w/o any help from parents so he's of course trying to be the conservative one. It's tough and I always start to cry. I will be all cried out by the time the wedding comes around.

Re: arguing all the time

scott and i argued moreso during our wedding preparation process than we did pre-engagement and current. we just felt some pressure all around us and it all came out at each other. we often realized what it was due to but cannot help it. what we tried to do was take the weekend off to do other stuff.. 'us' time. it helped us relax a lil.

Re: arguing all the time

we argue all the time... but we usually get over it like an hour later. I think its so normal to have little 'spiffs' throughout the day, especially with this whole wedding planning process!!
FH and I actually just got back from bed bath & beyond,,, updating our registry. i swear, he took all the joy out of playing around with that laser gun, and all the excitement of getting new things!! Like, i understand that guys hate shopping, but i hate that he takes the joy out of it for me... i dont want to resent him everytime we have to do something wedding related!!!! Even if theyre not interested, why cant they just fake it?!?!

ok.. sorry to vent! so in answer to your question, you are Definately Not alone in this!!!

it will get better! you and FH have a strong foundation... that's why you're getting married!!!

Re: arguing all the time

Oh yes, definitely...well I experimenting on how would be the best approach to end the fighting...Like the best way to approach him with wedding related issues in the future...I think the metamorphosis has been very good though and it has also been an excellent way to learn how to handle him and things post wedding.
Ex...at first he didn't understand why certain things had to be done NOW and why we needed a 10 piece band...after fighting and listening it equated to cultural differences as well as it was a sort of cry that he wanted to be more involved. Lesson #1 for me. Communicate more and involve him. Lesson number 2 timeline issues...After 3 timeline extensions I just laid out my 'hurt feelings' in a nice email stating what made me upset, hurt (insert your feelings here) and made sure he understood but more importantly that I wasn't blaming him or attacking him in any way! Basically, 'When you do this, I feel this.' and 'I don't mean this as an attack or blah, blah, blah but I feel that it is important for you to know how ____ made me feel so we can understand, grow, and move forward'. He has been a doll ever since.
I know a lot of people that are going through the same thing. My advise would be to try to communicate as much as possible. Remember we are from 2 completely different planets! Seriously the language is a B*TCH! You'll work through it..Use the time to experiment with the best ways to resolve things.

Re: arguing all the time

short answer... YES. love my guy, but UGHHH he's the equivalent of bridezilla, THE MONSTER GROOM! and has to be the final vote on everything. we moved in together-to rent out his place and save money, i changed my day job and got a second job to help pay for things, and we have wedding stress, so we have a lot of factors causing us to fight (long answer.)

if we didn't have the wedding, life would be peachy and MORE than half our squabbles gone...but alas not the case. just hang in there and hope like so many of us that it ends up OK.

Re: arguing all the time

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Posted by bluesashbride

short answer... YES. love my guy, but UGHHH he's the equivalent of bridezilla, THE MONSTER GROOM! and has to be the final vote on everything. we moved in together-to rent out his place and save money, i changed my day job and got a second job to help pay for things, and we have wedding stress, so we have a lot of factors causing us to fight (long answer.)

My guy is a freaking Monster Groom too, he has to be involved in EVERYTHING...including the flowers...he doesn't know the name of ONE flower

And yes, we have been fighting constantly since we got engaged....