Re: asking for money

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Posted by mara1017

Any way you put it it is tacky. You don't have a wedding for gifts. If I got an invitation that said anything about cash or money preferred I would make sure I bring a boxed gift (and I always gift cash)

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THIS

asking for money

Don't ask for money on your invites. Just make a honeymoon registry as a secret way of asking for money. People usually give money anyways.

asking for money

There is no classy way to ask for cash! If you have lots of out of towners, you can spread the word but even then you have to be careful.
Say things like: 'Oh, I have been working on our card box since everyone brings checks to the wedding!' Or 'I'm registering for my bridal shower only since no one brings actual presents to the wedding on Long Island'

Re: asking for money

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Posted by luveiduv12

I think most people give money. I've never seen gifts at a wedding... That's what showers are for.

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I agree! If you don't include a registry in the wedding invitation then that is a hint right there that money is preffered. On the other hand, you cannot control what ppl bring (unfortunetely)! It depends on the person & how much they know about weddings! But you definitely cannot write about it in any way - it looks tacky no matter how you word it.

Good luck!

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Posted by dawnbon26

I understand that my opinion might not be well received here but I'm going to voice it anyway. We all would like the the cash gift to try and make back some of the cost of the wedding, but a gift is a gift. You invited the person or the couple to share in your special day, hopefully not for their checkbook.

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I agree! It's a thin line because yes, you invite them becuase you want to share your day so when they do not give you a monetary gift, it's like a slap in the face UNLESS they have a special circumstance where they cannot afford to give a grand gift. things like that you have to understand too.

I was a maid of honor at my friend's wedding & she told me that one of her bridesmaids did not give her a gift - AT ALL!!!! Now that is pretty low - no matter how poor you are, you can give something. Especially that you are in the BP!

Re: asking for money

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Posted by HSsweethearts

You really can't ask for cash. On a wedding invitation there should NEVER me a mention of any kind of registry at all.

In NY most people will give cash. 90+% of my wedding gifts were cash.

Keep your registry limited, to just enough for your shower.

You can also set up a honeyfund. With honeyfund, instead of the money going directly to your honeymoon, you will actually get the money PayPaled to you. The only downside is that there is a PayPal fee taken out. I also know of honeymoon registries with no fee, but the money goes directly into your honeymoon. Anyway, with a successful honeymoon registry, you can get your HM paid for and then keep the cash you would have spent on the honeymoon.

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I've heard about the honeyfund before - How do you set one up & where?

Re: asking for money

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Posted by pinkbunny

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Posted by soon to be Mrs Arias

Reality is you will never get back (monetary wise)what you invest in huge wedding or the reception alone, unless your parents are paying for the entire thing That's my 5 cents :)

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So true. What you wrote though reminds me of a co-worker who asked me about my wedding. When I told him that FH and I are paying for it, he said something along the lines that its only worth it if you have someone else paying for it. I looked at him and said, I didn't know I was getting married and having a reception to make money off my family!

I don't expect any type of gift and also understand that everyone is in a different situation. I can't be mad/disappointed if my 85yr old Aunt gives me $50 or if someone decides to buy me pots! A gift is a gift and I think we all will appreciate whatever we get

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I agree with you 100%

Re: asking for money

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Posted by RussianBride

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Posted by HSsweethearts

You really can't ask for cash. On a wedding invitation there should NEVER me a mention of any kind of registry at all.

In NY most people will give cash. 90+% of my wedding gifts were cash.

Keep your registry limited, to just enough for your shower.

You can also set up a honeyfund. With honeyfund, instead of the money going directly to your honeymoon, you will actually get the money PayPaled to you. The only downside is that there is a PayPal fee taken out. I also know of honeymoon registries with no fee, but the money goes directly into your honeymoon. Anyway, with a successful honeymoon registry, you can get your HM paid for and then keep the cash you would have spent on the honeymoon.

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I've heard about the honeyfund before - How do you set one up & where?

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Some travel agencies (you can FM me for details) can set up a direct no-fee honeymoon registry where the money goes right to your trip. if you want a honeyfund, just go to honeyfund.com.

asking for money

I agree with many of the other girls. I don't think your wedding invite should say anything about gifts. The registry information is supposed to get out to people in the bridal shower invite or word of mouth. I would have a few choice items on the registry and people will get the point that you don't want that many gifts. Most people will give you money for the actual wedding anyway.

Re: asking for money

This thread is a joke right?????

You don't have a wedding for gifts and I'm appalled that you would even think of putting that on an invitation. You invite someone because you want them to be there with you on your special day...not for a gift. This thread is horrible in my opinion & if you are in such need of money then hopefully you aren't spending a lot on the event and saving it for the future instead.

Re: asking for money

I've actually had an invitation that said at the end of it 'No Boxed Gifts Please' I gave them cash. I realized they wrote that because they were moving to another state in 6 months due to grooms job.

Re: asking for money

You cannot ask for money on your invitation... that is BEYOND tacky. Like Mara and Robin said I would be inclined to come with a gift if I received an invitation that said 'monetary gifts preferred'.

I would also be careful of deleting your registry after your shower. I had a couple of non-gifters who were non-gifters simply because I deleted my registry. I also had people bring gifts to my wedding.. It is what it is. A gift is a gift. Some of thing actual gifts I received are quite nice honestly.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by HSsweethearts

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Posted by jacktart86

I feel like most people give money gifts. At least on long island anyway. And really if a person didnt bring any sort of gift to a wedding that's extremely cheap on their part. I can't imagine someone coming and not giving a gift.

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You would be surprised. I had several no-gifters. I was most annoyed with the last minute cancellation no-gifters. I also had some friends give a gift worth $50 for a couple, and a $25 gift card for a couple!!

Both of these people are engaged.I don't know what I'm supposed to show up to their weddings with, but I would never give the gifts they gave.

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Omg this happened to my best friend! It was one of her bridesmaids & she did not bring her a gift - Not even a $25 gift card! I couldnt believe it!
I agree that a gift is a gift - no body told you to do an expensive reception - that's your choice & your guests should not be expected to cover your costs. Let's not forget that a wedding is a celebration you want to share with your friends & family. Be happy with what you get!
And you should write down what everyone gave so you know what to give for their wedding. That's how I see it.

Re: asking for money

Never ever make a reference to a gift on your invitation....totally tacky and gross. You will be viewed VERY negatively by your guests! There is NO nice or polite way to ask for money or anything else. People are not obligated to give you a gift at all but of course most or all will. That being said ' you get what you get and you don't get upset'. All the best!

asking for money

I think word if mouth would be best.