Re: asking for money

I'm with Mara. If I got an invitation that said that, whomever sent it would be getting a tree planted in their name in sub-Saharan Africa.

I would strongly advise against putting that on the invitation.

asking for money

I didn't think registry info even went on the invite? Only on shower invites I thought.
The only time I did gifts and not cash was when the people had a bunch of stuff leftover on the registry and I was in college and tight for money otherwise I'd just give money anyway. If you don't want people using the registry just get rid of it quick after the shower lol

asking for money

I have never seen an invite with any gift info on it. Usually any gift info is on the bridal shower invite. Also I have never seen anyone give anything but money at a wedding. If you want to put something on the invite maybe you can write something along the lines of thank you for joining us and we are saving up for a house so one day you can join us at our house. Im not good with words lol Maybe if you list a goal then it will be better. We are doing a honey moon fund so people can give us money but they know it goes towards something.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by Shanti12

I didn't think registry info even went on the invite? Only on shower invites I thought.
The only time I did gifts and not cash was when the people had a bunch of stuff leftover on the registry and I was in college and tight for money otherwise I'd just give money anyway. If you don't want people using the registry just get rid of it quick after the shower lol

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I would be careful of getting rid of your registry. If someone is inclined to I've a gift instead of cash they will whether you have a registry or not. If it were me and someone was going to give a boxed gift instead of cash I would much prefer something I want and need instead of something that they think I want.

I found that some of the people in the older generation like to give boxed gifts and their taste may be very different then yours

Re: asking for money

I agree that word of mouth is the best way to go about this. Also don't register for a lot of items and don't spread the word about a registry either. If people don't know what to buy you then they will probably give you money.

asking for money

I understand that my opinion might not be well received here but I'm going to voice it anyway. We all would like the the cash gift to try and make back some of the cost of the wedding, but a gift is a gift. You invited the person or the couple to share in your special day, hopefully not for their checkbook.

Re: asking for money

I wouldn't put anything like that on an invite and if I saw it on an invite, I'd be sorely tempted to bring a physical, non-returnable gift. A gift is a gift and you should just be grateful to get one period!

Also, most people will give money anyway. We received a total of ONE physical gift out of 186 guests.

asking for money

I Think its VERY VERY offensive/tacky to add that or anything about gifts on to your wedding invitation for that don't have a huge wedding and spend the money you would have spent on what you really need/want. Reality is you will never get back (monetary wise)what you invest in huge wedding or the reception alone,unless your parents are paying for the entire thing. That's my 5 cents :)

Re: asking for money

As many of the ladies here have said, there is no better way to alienate your guests and guarantee you get the opposite of what you'd like than to ask for money on an invitation.

A wedding invitation is just that - an invitation. You are inviting people to be your guest because you want them to celebrate your big day with you. Don't make it sound like a fundraiser!

People will find out where you are registered or what you'd like (money or otherwise) through word-of-mouth. It may be the old-fashioned way but it is tried and true, and you won’t run the risk of offending anyone.

Re: asking for money

You really can't ask for cash. On a wedding invitation there should NEVER me a mention of any kind of registry at all.

In NY most people will give cash. 90+% of my wedding gifts were cash.

Keep your registry limited, to just enough for your shower.

You can also set up a honeyfund. With honeyfund, instead of the money going directly to your honeymoon, you will actually get the money PayPaled to you. The only downside is that there is a PayPal fee taken out. I also know of honeymoon registries with no fee, but the money goes directly into your honeymoon. Anyway, with a successful honeymoon registry, you can get your HM paid for and then keep the cash you would have spent on the honeymoon.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by soon to be Mrs Arias

Reality is you will never get back (monetary wise)what you invest in huge wedding or the reception alone, unless your parents are paying for the entire thing That's my 5 cents :)

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So true. What you wrote though reminds me of a co-worker who asked me about my wedding. When I told him that FH and I are paying for it, he said something along the lines that its only worth it if you have someone else paying for it. I looked at him and said, I didn't know I was getting married and having a reception to make money off my family!

I don't expect any type of gift and also understand that everyone is in a different situation. I can't be mad/disappointed if my 85yr old Aunt gives me $50 or if someone decides to buy me pots! A gift is a gift and I think we all will appreciate whatever we get

Re: asking for money

For our wedding I can tell you, we 'got back' in cash gifts just under half of what we paid for the reception alone, and 1/4 of what we paid for the entire wedding.

In this economy, you really cant expect to make back the money you spend, especially if you have it at an expensive place.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by youmewe

Its tacky no way around it but I do think most people will probably give money.

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This!

Re: asking for money

We just got a wedding invite that asks for gifts to be donations to a favorite charity of the bride and groom. While I think that is slightly better than mentioning a registry or cash, I think ANY mention of gifts at all, in the invitation, is way out of line. I might just skip going to a wedding that asked for cash on the invite - WAY TACKY!

asking for money

I feel like most people give money gifts. At least on long island anyway. And really if a person didnt bring any sort of gift to a wedding that's extremely cheap on their part. I can't imagine someone coming and not giving a gift.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by jacktart86

I feel like most people give money gifts. At least on long island anyway. And really if a person didnt bring any sort of gift to a wedding that's extremely cheap on their part. I can't imagine someone coming and not giving a gift.

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You would be surprised. I had several no-gifters. I was most annoyed with the last minute cancellation no-gifters. I also had some friends give a gift worth $50 for a couple, and a $25 gift card for a couple!!

Both of these people are engaged.I don't know what I'm supposed to show up to their weddings with, but I would never give the gifts they gave.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by 2013Bride

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Posted by daniekinz

maybe something like 'monetary gifts preferred'. but yeah...you cant ask for money.

maybe word of mouth. tell one person and let them spread the word!

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I was thinking word of mouth too is your best bet!

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Word of mouth is the best. I wouldn't put it on the invite. Have your mom and his mom tell the family members.

FH and I are planning to delete our registry after my bridal shower, so hopefully that will help with the cash gifts.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by FutureMrsSweeney

FH and I are planning to delete our registry after my bridal shower, so hopefully that will help with the cash gifts.

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Someone brought up a good point on the previous page about NOT deleting your registry. At least you would be getting things from your registry rather than getting some random gift or duplicate gifts.

Re: asking for money

People give something other than money? Not to any wedding I have been too so I wouldn't really worry. Don't put anything about gifts on the invite...thats just weird and will make people talk about it in a not so nice way.

Registries are really for showers! Delete it after your shower if you want.

Re: asking for money

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Posted by FutureMrsSweeney

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Posted by 2013Bride

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Posted by daniekinz

maybe something like 'monetary gifts preferred'. but yeah...you cant ask for money.

maybe word of mouth. tell one person and let them spread the word!

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I was thinking word of mouth too is your best bet!

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Word of mouth is the best. I wouldn't put it on the invite. Have your mom and his mom tell the family members.

FH and I are planning to delete our registry after my bridal shower, so hopefully that will help with the cash gifts.

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I would NOT do this. Some people, especially if they are out of state, are going to look to buy you a gift. it's A) Better to get a gift you want than something random and B) Easier to return gifts from your registry. You don't even need the receipt in most cases!

Seriously think about going light on the gift registry and going all out on the honeymoon registry. I got honeymoon registry gifts for both the wedding and the shower. it's SO convenient for your guests and you're ultimately getting cash either right onto your honeymoon, or in your paypal account