Have you ever gotten into it over wedding planning? Right now we are discussing not getting married in the Catholic church. Neither of us is particularily Catholic. I mean we don't go to mass. I have always dreamed of getting married in the church but things change. My mom will be paying for the bulk of the wedding --she doesn't seem too disappointed in the fact that we dont plan on gettng married in church. i think once she starts shelling out money that might change (doen't it always?)! My bf is really oppossed to this. Have you gone through something similar?
What else have you had issues over w/ your fh, stemming from wedding planning?
qtdimps23
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Re: Biggest disagreement during wedding planning...
FH wanted to just go to a justice of the peace and not have a huge wedding. i won that battle.
portjeffbride
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It's a personal decision.... just make sure both you and FH come to a consensus. My cousin wanted to marry in a church while her DH didn't. She conceded, and frankly has regretted it for the last 5 years becuase she now can't raise her son Cahtolic. If he really is adamant, and you feel you may be more flexible, I personally would advise to marry in church. there's nothing worse than one spouse regretting the lack of church sanction of their own marriage! However, if he's more flexible, and you really want to dissociate with the church, I would advise to not get married at church...
We're sort of like you.... not religious at all.... but we decided to get married in the church. Why? Well, we're both from really old-school families, and we were raised with the belief that marriage MUST be within a church for it to be 'official'. I know, it's really grandma-like thinking, but we confess we're still in that mind-set. Even if we were less traditional (like my cousins who almost all got married at their reception halls by ministers), we would marry in a church simply becuase FMIL would basically view us 'living in sin' if we didn't have a Catholic marriage. (She is a genuine old-school Catholic Pole, and views FSIL's marriage in a hall that way, and reminds us of that on a fairly regular basis )
either way, I recommend pre-cana. It was a good experience. not very preachy... they gave good practical advice
amylove81
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Re: Biggest disagreement during wedding planning...
Where to live. PA, MD, nyc or ny state or NJ. Or just live with mother, save $ and while deciding. We're still in this process, and it's the worst.
PeteysBride
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We opted out of a church wedding and my mom had a fit-his mom advised us to elope..some tenson there.
Our biggest disagreement was probably over our original centerpieces-He's nto an artsy guy. I am very ecclectic and artsy. He likes traditional. I like modern. So we butted heads majorly because he'd have been happy with everythign standard white and damask and I wanted ti to reflect our fun perosnalities. So we snarled a little, especially because he was paying for the bulk of it and that made me edgy. He's usually not bad with money-will give me whatever I want because I rarely ask for anything. But before our parents started chipping in, it was a lot to manage financially.
I finally got my tax returns from gov (WOOO HOO) so I can afford the little touches like paraols and things I wanted that he was againt because he didnt think we hadroom in the budget.
Chanwich
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Ugh, finding a RH has been our biggest one so far. Obviously we haven't settled on anything yet. He wants it upstate, I want it on LI. My parents are paying for part of it, and they are on LI, so I have that leverage. But his entire family is upstate and he doens't see why they should have to be the ones travelling. I tried to compromise by doing in somewhere in the middle, but my parents vetoed that immediately and said that they wouldn't help pay for it if it wasn't on LI. I said OK, we will just wait a few years and save up enough money ourselves. Then I just wanted a destintation wedding, but then his grandma wouldnt be able to come, so we had to nix that as well. Now I just stopped caring and am just taking a break from even looking since it seems that we get into it every time we talk about it. Grrrrr
KRISTYRUSSELL
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ITS HARD, BUT YOU WILL FIGURE IT OUT, DO WHAT YOU GUYS WANT AND REMEMBER ITS A GIVE AND TAKE
PrincessJen
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So far the season. I wanted winter & he wanted summer or fall. I compromised & we're having it in the summer. It's the only thing he's requested to date & everything else I ask for he tells me yes. I just changed my vision a bit.
NowAndForever2012
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Minister......FH wanted his friend he grew up with. I wanted my cousin. In the end her won. I got other things on my mind.
SoontobeMrsH
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I wanted a fall/ possible new years eve wedding, he wanted our date to be 06*07*08. We compromised w/ the June wedding, but we can throw NYE parties.
LoveisBliss
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We are just starting to embark on this whole wedding planning journey... So we haven't really gotten into too many disagreements yet (Can't wait for those to start lol )
But we were kicking around ideas and I wanted to have a halloween wedding with a halloween theme... FH didn't really think it would go over well with the families
Oh.. and penne vodka.. he's obsessed with that lol
rfilipofornow
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invites, hands down. FH just can't understand why paper is so expensive!
robynci1
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Our biggest issue is how much the wedding is costing. My FH doesn't understand why our wedding is going to cost so much money....And why I want a castle or a mansion (lol lol). Planning a wedding is so stressful, mostly the $$$ issues and saving the money. We haven't booked any vendors yet, but just booking the rh was a bit of a battle. He wanted East Wind and I want the Bourne Mansion. There is a financial difference and I think I am winning.....
qdavis
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OH BOY!!!.....THERE WERE MANY!! BUT LET ME KEEP IT SIMPLE.....CHAIR COVERS, AND GETTING VIDEO....STILL IN BATTLE!!! OH BOY!
KRISTYRUSSELL
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most men just don t understand decorating and so on especially if they dont have any sister, which my does not, so it was easy and very hard at the same time, some things more very difficult, but here I am 53 days before my wedding, and we worked it out, cant say I didnt get a few grey hairs along the way, but remember give and take, your way his way, it will never even out, but if you dont do a little of both, it will never be right, remember that....
B22
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every single idea I have my FH shoots down. Its driving me nuts
TrueLoveIn2008
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He wants to get married in Savannah, GA where we got engaged ... I want it on LI as that is where 85% of our guests live .... he wants a very small ceremony (like, parents and siblings ONLY) with only a maid of honor and best man ... I want everyone in the world there and a small bridal party.
As you can see, we are having a few big disagreements, and thus, can't move forward on any planning yet.
Jenny
tricia3381
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Re: Biggest disagreement during wedding planning...
the guest list.
LoveRocks
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We've had a few MINOR disagreements, but for the most part we've had the same vision of what we wanted our wedding to be. FH has told me over and over that I have complete creative control over everything and that this wedding 'is my monster' and I should do what makes me happy.
RGV07
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Re: Biggest disagreement during wedding planning...
my fh alaways wanted to go to the justice of peace , it easier, not keen on wedding or the cost assoicated with it. i alaways dream of my day, so he gave in
