Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Original post by Windy

Feb 23, 2010 09:55 PM

The church we are getting married at does not have a permanent priest right now. So after going through the chain of command we ended up at a meeting tonight with the arch bishop of Queens, who immediately says that he will marry us...

However, after listening to him talk about India and sex-trade for almost an hour he starts telling us his 'rules':

1) He hates tardiness. If i am even 5 min late to the wedding he will leave - ummmm ok.
2) He hates photographers and doesnt want any at the wedding - what!

I challenged him on rule #2 explaining how important pics were for me. So he said, 'I will make an announcement before the wedding telling the guests that they are not allowed to take pics and you can have one photographer sit in the 4th row to take pics but he is not allowed to move.'

Again I challenged (politely). To which he responded, 'Well then Im not marrying you... I'll let you know when I find someone willing to marry you!'

ok.:

FH says I shouldnt have said anything!

dfw343 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 07:39 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

it's one thing if he said 'can you please have the photographer stand at a certain angle so flash doesn't get in my eyes or something..that is reasonable..but no pics at ALL?

Um, no.

lissylissa Posted: Feb 24, 2010 07:48 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Omg. You were right saying something its your wedding ummm of course you want pics and of course you want your family and friends to take pics too that is just not fair I've never heard such a thing. I hope you find someone who will allow this!

marinai7 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 08:10 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

WOW, that's crazy. Hope you find someone.

drivwal Posted: Feb 24, 2010 08:11 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

um first of all that wedding officiant needs to get off of his high horse and chill, you are making a considerable donation to his church to have him marry you, its not like he would be doing you a favor. and secondly, what gives him the right to treat people that way is he not a man of god and must be a role model of being a holy and good person? he's too cranky, let him walk out on the responsibility of marrying you. good for you for speaking up a bit!

StaceyWill Posted: Feb 24, 2010 08:25 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

I can't even believe it!!! How incredibly rude!!!!

italgal Posted: Feb 24, 2010 08:50 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Posted by MrsS2be

Oh my god!! You need to find a different church...that's ridiculous!

ITA............Who is this guy, Bishop Hitler?

RaeloveMeg Posted: Feb 24, 2010 09:06 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Ohhhh HELLL NO!!!! LoL I would not go for that Ive never heard of anything like that before!!!!!! And I know in my church we have to pay a fee to be married there are you guys paying the fee if so ask why cant you have it your way!!! I would go some where else if thats the case tho!

christine2010 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 09:15 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

its better that you said something.
when my sisters boyfriends brother got married in October at a Church in New Jersey the priest was so rude during the ceremony. before it started he made an announcement that no one is allowed to use flashes because he suffers from seizures, ok not too bad, then continues to describe his seizure experiences to everyone sitting in the Church. he then proceeds to yell at everyone about cell phones, saying they where created by the devil.
then right before the ceremony started the priest started shouting down the aisle at the photographer saying, don't forget what i told you at the rehearsal, you are not allowed to walk any closer to this alter then the last pew of people.
& don't even get me started on how horrible he performed the ceremony. most of what he said made no sense. he just read quickly threw everything & rushed all the readers. actually saying things like, please move your reading along.

& i know for a fact that they 'donated' a lot of money to have their wedding there.

lm398 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 09:20 AM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

That's a bit ridiculous! I remember that Youtube video was going around when we met with the Priest for our church who informed us that if anyone pulled anything at all or if anyone was drinking at all before the wedding - he would stop the wedding & leave...I was like ook I understand but calm down - we weren't even planning it!

I have to wonder if they just have dealt with too many over the top things that make them so harsh in their convos w/ brides & grooms or what!

HSsweethearts Posted: Feb 24, 2010 02:22 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Ok, obviously you don't want this guy doing your wedding.

What is your church? Maybe a priest at a local church can do it for you? My church has several priest who are just really easygoing and fabu,

halfbaked Posted: Feb 24, 2010 02:59 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Oh hell no! You were absolutely right for saying something. I want good pics!

I Love Paolo Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:04 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

Honestly, why is he so against photographers, obviously its not a church rule. You wont even know the photographers are there!

Jna2010 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:04 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

um wow, that was so rude, and his requirements are ridiculous.. no pictures at a wedding>???? is he out of his mind

Never2Part Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:17 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

whaaaaaatttt- that priest sounds insane.

JenBill61210 Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:34 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

soontobecruz Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:37 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

find a new church!!

Im_My_Own_Princess Posted: Feb 24, 2010 03:41 PM

Re: Bizzare meeting with the wedding officiant (long)

thats REALLY weird... I mean our church has a rule that only ONE picture can be taken during the readings.. but we spoke with our photog and they said they know 'Saint Patricks' rules... actually every photog we spoke to said they knew them and they knew how to get around them.

if you WANT him to marry you ask him if it would be ok for the photog to take pictures as you walk down the aisle and exit, but he can sit during the ceremony.... your photog might have a few tricks up his sleeve.

but honestly, he did sound a bit rude.