BM Vent

so i went bridesmaid dress shopping with my girls over a month ago. most of them ordered their dress that day. i had a few who couldn't come, which was fine. the salon told me the order needed to be in by halloween in order for the dresses to be in on time, and they will only send out the order once everyone has ordered their dresses, but i figured i had no need to worry since that was over a month to get everything in.

well here we are less than a week from the end of october, and not one, but TWO of my bridesmaids have still not ordered their dresses. i've sent e-mails and texts, and they keep saying they are going to do it. i just called the salon today to check and was told they still haven't ordered them.

i am gettin so annoyed and am really not sure what to do anymore other than tell them they are out of the wedding unless they order the dresses by this weds (halloween).
any suggestions on how to handle this?

Re: BM Vent

Giving them an ultimatum is not going to go well.

Maybe have the salon call the girls directly or make an appointment and go with them.

Also, explain to them, since the dresses come from China, you run into the Chinese New Year when they close for about 4-6 weeks to celebrate. You will also need a few weeks for alterations.

BM Vent

I agree about the ultimatum. Have you explained to the BMs that they are holding other girls up? Maybe if they realize that it's affecting more than one person, they will be more responsive. You could also suggest a day & time to meet at the bridal salon and then take them for a drink or dinner afterwards.

BM Vent

I don't think giving them an ultimatum is a very good idea either. I would do/mention the same things that sandr325 has brought up. I'm running into a similar problem with two of my girls (not returning texts, emails, etc...) about their dresses. I've concluded that if they don't have clothes to wear to the wedding, they won't be in the party and I'll deal with the shortage/uneven numbers then. I'm no grown woman's mommy, they can't be bothered to get to things/respond to stuff, I don't chase them down. It'll suck, but what can you do? You have other more important things to worry about.

Re: BM Vent

I would suggest just calling them each and offering to go with them. Just be clear with out giving an actual ultimatum (because that cane come off bad) that if they don't go by Wednesday they won't have a dress to wear at your wedding.

BM Vent

Tough situation, but I might just wait it out. If their dresses don't come in time, they can't be in the party and it's their own fault. You don't need to stress about irresponsible people.

Re: BM Vent

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Posted by KroertGS

Tough situation, but I might just wait it out. If their dresses don't come in time, they can't be in the party and it's their own fault. You don't need to stress about irresponsible people.

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This! This is what I am doing. They are adults. If they dont get there dress in time, there in for a very serious guilt trip from me (that's my specialty) lol.

Re: BM Vent

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Posted by db276952

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Posted by KroertGS

Tough situation, but I might just wait it out. If their dresses don't come in time, they can't be in the party and it's their own fault. You don't need to stress about irresponsible people.

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This! This is what I am doing. They are adults. If they dont get there dress in time, there in for a very serious guilt trip from me (that's my specialty) lol.

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This! I have run into the same problem. A couple of my girls live out of state so I asked everyone to order their dresses before September to ensure they come on time and if there are any problems we would be able to take care of it right away. I followed up with calls, texts, and emails. All the girls said they purchased their dress and for 1 girl I even found a website where she would be able to order her dress and told her she could get it shipped to my house since she's in the Navy and moves around a lot. Well the one that's in the Navy texted me last week that she will be home for Thanksgiving and if I wanted to go order the dress with her. WHAT! REALLY!
So I just decided to say fine whatever happens happens and if she has to pay for express then that is her problem and if the dress doesn't come in time then so be it, the number will be uneven, no biggie

BM Vent

I think you should let them know that the dresses have to be ordered by Wed because thats when the bridal salon is sending the order out so that they will arrive on time.If they don't order them then they don't have a dress that's all. I wouldn't stress out about it. Just wondering are they maybe having financial problems and cant afford the dress?

Re: BM Vent

I thought this was just happening to me... my girls are NOT moving it along with this ordering the dress thing. I thought I was being easy to deal with by letting them order whichever one they want but now I see I have to be a little more strict. And if they don't order it - I'm with the other girls, then they don't have anything to wear and they can't be in it.

BM Vent

I'm going through the same thing as well. A few of mine already ordered the dresses and they came in super quick. That is the only reason why I was giving the others more time. It's up to them to order the dresses. I can't worry about it. If they are discontinued or not ordered in time it's not my fault. It is what it is at this point.

BM Vent

I went through the same thing, I guess it's common.
I agree with the other ladies. Tell them that the order goes out on the 31st no matter what. If they don't get in, they don't have a dress.

Re: BM Vent

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Posted by mf324

so i went bridesmaid dress shopping with my girls over a month ago. most of them ordered their dress that day. i had a few who couldn't come, which was fine. the salon told me the order needed to be in by halloween in order for the dresses to be in on time, and they will only send out the order once everyone has ordered their dresses, but i figured i had no need to worry since that was over a month to get everything in.

well here we are less than a week from the end of october, and not one, but TWO of my bridesmaids have still not ordered their dresses. i've sent e-mails and texts, and they keep saying they are going to do it. i just called the salon today to check and was told they still haven't ordered them.

i am gettin so annoyed and am really not sure what to do anymore other than tell them they are out of the wedding unless they order the dresses by this weds (halloween).
any suggestions on how to handle this?

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Going through the same thing with FSIL (getting married 2 weeks after you). FH says to leave it be and if the dress doesn't come in on time, is discontinued, etc then to turn around and say you cannot be in it. So until that happens I am remaining calm and collected bc honestly, what else can I do? If we freak out it won't get us anywhere and I think I would rather have the satisfaction to say, told ya so and then boot them out than to go through it now. IMHO

Re: BM Vent

thanks for all the suggestions ladies.. and i can't believe how common this problem seems to be!

i think i am just going to have the order sent out on the 31st as it is that day.. if they haven't ordered by then, so be it. as you all said, its not worth the stress.

Re: BM Vent

update: one of my girls ordered her dress yesterday.
so now i am just waiting on one. i texted her yesterday to remind her - of course i have not gotten a response.