Bored/Curious - What goes into how much you give as a wedding gift?

Generally, we give $300 as a couple. If we are in the Bridal Party or if its family, we will give more.
However, we always take into account
1. Venue
2. Day of the week and Time of Day

If i were to happen to find out how much the couple were paying per plate i would base it off of that.
Last year, i had to go to a co-workers wedding and she was getting married in a Sunday suring the day. No VH. I found out she was only paying about 90 pp with taxes and gratuities.
We gave her a $200 gift since we knew she was going to end up quitting a few weeks later and she would not be coming to our wedding.

While i wouldn't do that to a family member, generally speaking, i would try to cover to cost of my plate and that of my FH when giving a gift.

It depends how close I am to the bride or groom, and if I traveled to see them. For example, I gave a close college friend $125 just for me (no guest) at a beach wedding in the Outer Banks of NC. I flew there ($180) and got a rental car ($100), and rented a room in a house w friends ($250 for three nights).

Had she gotten married locally in PA where she lived, I likely would've gifted more since there would not have been a plane ticket or rental car cost.

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Posted by Moonmist09

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Posted by jilliibabii

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Posted by MrsSx2

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Posted by HSsweethearts

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Posted by MrsSx2

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Posted by HSsweethearts

What do you factor into the decision?
There was a pretty heated thread on LIF about this..

Do you have a standard amount for weddings
Do you consider closeness of the person
Day of the week/time of day?
Price of venue?
Whether or not people are paying for it themselves?

Has planning your own wedding changed your view?

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Our standard is $250...we also factor in other things that may increase or decrease the standard. Some of the factors are travel (if we have had to spend money flying in or staying in hotels for the wedding), relation (we give more money to closer relations), and if we're in the BP.

HTH...I am totally gonna go check out that heated debate.

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It was pulled!

I generally haven't been deducting for travel expensed

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Oh shoot, i missed it!

We never took out for tavel expenses either until we had our own wedding. We had 9 no-gifters and about 5 of them had traveled in. I guess thats what a lot of people who travel do. So, we don't take out much, but we do consider it when writing the check.

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10 pages of utter ridiculousness! Trust me, you didn't miss much! Giving NO gift is a little much for travel expenses- we had to travel and pay for a hotel in October so we gave $250 instead of $300.

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Which board on LIF was this on? Newlyweds?

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It was on FHF. It was about Communion gifts and a virtual brawl started based on whether people altered their gifts based on whether the party was at home or at a venue

I'm a little lost when it comes to weddings...

Do you give the money on top of a bridal shower gift?

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Posted by PeaceLoveWedding

I'm a little lost when it comes to weddings...

Do you give the money on top of a bridal shower gift?

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A Bridal Shower gift is totally separate and in addition to a wedding gift,

I find in NY the bridal shower is generally a gift from the registry and the wedding is usually a cash gift. Some relatives from out of state and some friends have bought us registry gifts for the wedding as well.

hmm.. never thought of this.. so if your in the BParty what would you give???


(( for my cousins wedding - i gave them $15 because my grandpa told us thats what they got as the MOST back in the day )) i said i didnt want you to start out with more then they had (my parents gave them a real check lol)

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Posted by kdm822

hmm.. never thought of this.. so if your in the BParty what would you give???


(( for my cousins wedding - i gave them $15 because my grandpa told us thats what they got as the MOST back in the day )) i said i didnt want you to start out with more then they had (my parents gave them a real check lol)

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I would think you would give more if you're in the Bparty...though maybe some would say less since you have so many other expesnes. What do you girls think?

What would you guys suggest giving for a wedding gift (as a couple) ... if you were paying over $600 (plus other expenses) for travel/hotel just for just 2 nights to attend a beach wedding out-of-state?

And no, it's not really going to be like a 'mini-vacation' for us lol

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Posted by nilla24

What would you guys suggest giving for a wedding gift (as a couple) ... if you were paying over $600 (plus other expenses) for travel/hotel just for just 2 nights to attend a beach wedding out-of-state?

And no, it's not really going to be like a 'mini-vacation' for us lol

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I say 400-500 if you can do it. Are they feeding you the night before and morning after? What type of place is?

it's a wedding on the beach in Tampa, FL .. followed by a sit-down dinner at a restaurant.
I don't think they are providing dinner night before or breakfast day after ..

Someone told me that you normally don't give gift's for a destination wedding, that your 'gift' is your presence ... but I feel like that's wrong, especially if the friend is pretty close.

I will also be going to her shower, bachelorette, etc ...

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Posted by Rivera2be

I typically do not take into consideration the time of year/day, venue, or if they are paying for it themselves.
I give more to close family & friends and a bit less to those that are more distant relatives/friends.

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this

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Posted by nilla24

it's a wedding on the beach in Tampa, FL .. followed by a sit-down dinner at a restaurant.
I don't think they are providing dinner night before or breakfast day after ..

Someone told me that you normally don't give gift's for a destination wedding, that your 'gift' is your presence ... but I feel like that's wrong, especially if the friend is pretty close.

I will also be going to her shower, bachelorette, etc ...

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I'd give $200. You've done more than enough for them! $500 gift on top of $600 in travel expenses? No way no how!

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Posted by jilliibabii

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Posted by nilla24

it's a wedding on the beach in Tampa, FL .. followed by a sit-down dinner at a restaurant.
I don't think they are providing dinner night before or breakfast day after ..

Someone told me that you normally don't give gift's for a destination wedding, that your 'gift' is your presence ... but I feel like that's wrong, especially if the friend is pretty close.

I will also be going to her shower, bachelorette, etc ...

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I'd give $200. You've done more than enough for them! $500 gift on top of $600 in travel expenses? No way no how!

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LOL and agree totally!! I mean, if it was your sister, ok $400+ travel etc is totally understandable but it's NOT. $200 and you are done.

And btw, are they going to come in for your wedding next year? Bc if not, that's bs.

Thanks girls! I think the $200 is more than fair.

Yes, they will probably come to my wedding next year .. but they live here in NY!!!!!