Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Original post by curlysue

Sep 03, 2003 01:26 PM

Okay bachelorette party is set for date, date happens to be on one of bridesmaid's birthday, bridesmaid wanted to gather all her friends and head out to the city for partying, bridesmaid tell M.O.H (after being told that that will be the day) make it another day except my b-day, M.O.H says no that date is set.

This bridesmaid is ****ed, called me at work to complain. Which ****ed my day to hell because of she is suprisingly acting.

This selfish inconsiderate *****!!

I'm fuming - I would never, never ever argue with the bride on something like this. I feel she is being selfish thinking of herself. I feel she is really disrespecting me on this. I'm honestly embarrased and shocked I have a bridesmaid acting like this. What is your take on this if this happened to you

franksbride Posted: Sep 03, 2003 02:52 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Bdays...although they are special come EVERY year...bachelorette parties for girlfriends DON'T.

I'd be p**** off too if one of my friends gave me that excuse...

Edited for spelling error...

mlp924 Posted: Sep 03, 2003 02:59 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

**** her and her birthday!

juju Posted: Sep 03, 2003 03:20 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

I agree with Cat. I might have hurt feelings. I would want my day to be for me. ON my birthday, I feel like that would be the opportunity to be selfish. A wedding date I know you can't change but, a bachelorette party can be changed. But, it is already set so I would just tell her that you understand if she cannot make it to your bachelorette party.

jenny2penny Posted: Sep 03, 2003 03:31 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

I do think it's wronge for her to vent to you, and make you upset, but I don't blame her for being ****ed off. The party I am sure will be fun, but if it was my b-day I would want to do what I want too, and let it be my day.

Why couldn't it have been another day??

goldilocks Posted: Sep 03, 2003 03:38 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Yeah, unless it was a milestone b-day (30), I wouldn't mind having a bach. party on my b-day. FH's cousins wedding was the day after my 30th!!! But we celebrated my b-day the night before and his cousin (she's great) went out of her way to acknowledge my b-day!
It sounds like she's upset b/c she wanted to be part of your party, but already had her plans to celebrate her b-day, is that right?
Ya know, you try your best to coordinate so many dates for your girls, shower, bach. party, rehearsal dinner, there's only so much you can do.
IMO it's forgivable, I'm sure she wantes to be there with you.
What about combining the 2 parties? The more the merrier with bach. parties!

LisaT Posted: Sep 03, 2003 03:48 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

I was going to say exactly what jenny2penny said. Its HER day, why shouldn't she spend it celebrating her birthday.

I don't think it was unreasonable for her to ask to change the day - so much in the next few months will be about you. But I think its unfortunate that she called you to complain. She should have dealt with it herself with the MOH.

I'm going to a wedding this weekend on my b-day and I'm a little sad about it. I like my birthday to be about ME, and I don't think thats too much for your BM to expect or ask for.

She wants to be there for you, she'd just rather have it a different day.

OCT1203 Posted: Sep 03, 2003 03:56 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Okay here is my two cents....Maybe I am selfish but hopefully we all get married once but you have other birthdays and it is hard to get all the BM's together for one night. I am sure she can go out with her friends another time but we all know how much our time is limited the closer we get to the wedding.

2bewedin04 Posted: Sep 03, 2003 07:09 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Did the MOH clear the date with you? If so, did you know it was her birthday? I guess if I was the bridesmaid I might be a bit insulted if the bride didn't at least consider that the date being chosen for the party was my birthday. A 'Hey this is the day that works best but I know it's your birthday, do you mind?' phone call might have helped. In the end, I'd probably just go and have fun ... but not being consulted beforehand would have bothered me.

yabbobay Posted: Sep 03, 2003 07:15 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

It seems that she wasn't involved in the planning...which is too bad...

in all honesty...your bachelor party date can be changed...its a little selfish not to change it (she may have been thinking of things to do on her b-day for the past year) her b-day is only one day...

but I don't like the fact that she called you to complain...you don't need the agita...

gertyrae Posted: Sep 03, 2003 08:45 PM

Re: Brides would you be ticked off at your bridesmaid if this happened...

Sue,
I got you beat. My BM has not only complained to my other BM's, including the MOH, about the bachelorette party...which by the way, isn't until January. She is totally complaining to them and me, every chance she gets, about the shower. Which I am not supposed to know about!!!!!!
All she does is complain about how much money it's costing her. When I asked her, I asked her if she wanted her daughter who is 9 to be a junior BM, this way she didn't have to do all the BM stuff. She told me NOOOO, she wants to be a part of her friends wedding. Now I feel like throwing her out and so do my sisters, she complains about the money constantly. I finally told her that maybe she should bow out or stop going to weddings of people she has known for two months and think about the friend that she soooo wanted to be there for.