Bridesmaid Doens't Want To Wear Makeup?

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Posted by waterspout4

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Posted by nferrandi

ETS- since she's your SIL, can you ask your brother to talk to her?

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I was just about to say this.

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my whole family, including my brother, is very traditional and their belief is that the bride should pay for all bridesmaids expenses.... *rolls eyes*

so they think that since i chose her, and she has to get ready for my day i should be responsible for paying for everything weddding related.

i even have to pay for her food when i ask her to come out with me to do wedding chores!

doens't make sense, but this is the kinda thing i have to deal with :(



i know this is sooo complicated, i am seriously thinking about moving to Siberia or somewhere far far away from them after this.

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Posted by eden

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Posted by waterspout4

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Posted by nferrandi

ETS- since she's your SIL, can you ask your brother to talk to her?

---

I was just about to say this.

---

my whole family, including my brother, is very traditional and their belief is that the bride should pay for all bridesmaids expenses.... *rolls eyes*

so they think that since i chose her, and she has to get ready for my day i should be responsible for paying for everything weddding related.

i even have to pay for her food when i ask her to come out with me to do wedding chores!

doens't make sense, but this is the kinda thing i have to deal with :(



i know this is sooo complicated, i am seriously thinking about moving to Siberia or somewhere far far away from them after this.

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um....that is such bulllllll S H I T!!!!! you have to pay for EVERYTHING wedding related??? i have NEVER heard of this before. no wonder she's being a spoiled biotch...cause the family has made her feel like she's 'entitled' or something.

i'm so sorry you are going thru this!

What is wrong with people??? Why dont they want to look good for themselves??? Sorry but I would be like, 'Fine, then look plain in all the pics'.

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Posted by MJDoc12


um....that is such bulllllll S H I T!!!!! you have to pay for EVERYTHING wedding related??? i have NEVER heard of this before. no wonder she's being a spoiled biotch...cause the family has made her feel like she's 'entitled' or something.

i'm so sorry you are going thru this!

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thanks! i really needed the hugs! and yeah, i had to pay for everything 'cus i guess it's just a drop in the bucket when you're a bride.

nevermind that this is my wedding and you should be privileged to be asked to be a bridesmaid. :(

My MOH wore lipstick and that was IT! To be honest, she doesn't wear makeup at all and is so gorgeous, she doesn't need it (don't you hate girls like that! LOL)

Anyways -- let me ask you something......In the whole scheme of things, does it really matter? Let her go without makeup.....TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THIS -- NO ONE WILL BE LOOKING AT HER!!!!

If she is the type to stress you out on purpose like you say -- let her go without and feel out of place.....don't give in to her, it's your friggin day....

Wow, I feel for you...it sounds like you have a real bridesMAIDzilla on your hands...I agree with the gals who suggested telling her that it's her choice in the end, but that she will look very washed out in pics. Or could you offer to pay for her makeup and not her hair? Could she do her own hair or have another BM do that for her? I'm guessign that she'll have an issue with that too...Good Luck!

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Posted by beaviss80

stand her in the back of the group for your pics...thats what we are doing for my FMIL who is wearing a bright teal pants suit from online.....

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holy cra*p ya cant let that one go,,,howd no one reply to this? lmaoooo

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Posted by Princess92406

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Posted by beaviss80

stand her in the back of the group for your pics...thats what we are doing for my FMIL who is wearing a bright teal pants suit from online.....

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holy cra*p ya cant let that one go,,,howd no one reply to this? lmaoooo

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i know right, thats what i thought....

Has she ever done her own make-up??????? Why is she giving you a hard time? It's not a difficult task. I would ask her if it is okay for one of the other girls to do her make-up.

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Posted by eden

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Posted by waterspout4

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Posted by nferrandi

ETS- since she's your SIL, can you ask your brother to talk to her?

---

I was just about to say this.

---

my whole family, including my brother, is very traditional and their belief is that the bride should pay for all bridesmaids expenses.... *rolls eyes*

so they think that since i chose her, and she has to get ready for my day i should be responsible for paying for everything weddding related.

i even have to pay for her food when i ask her to come out with me to do wedding chores!

doens't make sense, but this is the kinda thing i have to deal with :(



i know this is sooo complicated, i am seriously thinking about moving to Siberia or somewhere far far away from them after this.

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WHAT!!!! Traditional my a**.....It may be traditional to have the 'brides family' to pay for most of the wedding but bridesmaids costs.....since when has THIS been a tradition! NEVER heard that before!

& how old is this girl? seriously?! grow up! what is wrong with her? It sounds to me like your SIL is craving some attention and this is her way of doing it.

I would let it go....I guarantee when it comes to your day, she'll cave. She doesn't want to look horrible in pictures...no girl does even ones who don't wear make-up on a regular basis!!

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Posted by beaviss80

stand her in the back of the group for your pics...thats what we are doing for my FMIL who is wearing a bright teal pants suit from online.....

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HA HA HA, i love it! Thats a good idea. The BM is being spiteful and acting like a child. I had major BM drama and have little patience when it comes to it at this point. But i would confront her (nicely) and ask her if she really wants to be in your wedding, Seems like she isn't a very nice person to be making an otherwise stressful time for you even more stressful. JMO

What does she wear everyday on her face. Seriously, who threatens to not wear make-up. Let her not wear make-up, who cares... If she's pretty, then it doesn't matter and if her face isn't so hot, then she'll be the one embarassed. No one will be looking at her anyone. All eyes are on you.

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Posted by ronnysbride

i think she's being a brat since it was perfectly ok for her to wear make up as long as you were paying for it. I would tell her fine don't wear anything......she's the one that will look like a dope and not you.....but i'm just spiteful that way......

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I totaly agree!!!!!

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Posted by eden

thanks mjdoc, i know my relationship with this bridesmaid has deterioriated to a point where i don't even know i'll even want to speak to her again after the wedding.

she's my SIL so I can't do anything about giving her the boot (my family may just boycott the wedding) so i guess lesson learned is make sure you really know someone b4 you ask them to be a part of your wedding, especially when it comes to SIL or other relatives!

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Honestly, at this point, just ask her to step down and not be in your wedding at all.

Why would you want her to be in your bridal party? You are supposed to surround yourself with people who love you and support you. Not cause you grief or bring drama.

This is not a pity event. You are not THAT desperate that you would accept 'anyone' in your bridal party. She is not doing you a 'favor'. She is supposed to want to be in your wedding.

She is a liability. Cut your losses. You will be relieved you did. No telling what kind of drama she would pull on the wedding day.

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Posted by DNicholes

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Posted by eden

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Posted by waterspout4

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Posted by nferrandi

ETS- since she's your SIL, can you ask your brother to talk to her?

---

I was just about to say this.

---

my whole family, including my brother, is very traditional and their belief is that the bride should pay for all bridesmaids expenses.... *rolls eyes*

so they think that since i chose her, and she has to get ready for my day i should be responsible for paying for everything weddding related.

i even have to pay for her food when i ask her to come out with me to do wedding chores!

doens't make sense, but this is the kinda thing i have to deal with :(



i know this is sooo complicated, i am seriously thinking about moving to Siberia or somewhere far far away from them after this.

---

WHAT!!!! Traditional my a**.....It may be traditional to have the 'brides family' to pay for most of the wedding but bridesmaids costs.....since when has THIS been a tradition! NEVER heard that before!

& how old is this girl? seriously?! grow up! what is wrong with her? It sounds to me like your SIL is craving some attention and this is her way of doing it.

I would let it go....I guarantee when it comes to your day, she'll cave. She doesn't want to look horrible in pictures...no girl does even ones who don't wear make-up on a regular basis!!

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EXACTLY. it has never been a tradition for the bride to cover the BM expenses! as a nice gesture [these days] some brides pay for makeup or hair AS THEIR GIFT TO THE BMs. she's just being ridiculous and trying to get you to pay for her. it's nonsense. if you pay for her makeup, you'll have to pay for everyone else's or they WILL be offended [whether they tell you or not, they will]!!!!!!

i made hair and makeup by a pro optional. some did it, some didn't...but everyone did their hair and makeup nicely....even my sister who is notorious for being more 'gothic' looked 'normal' for the day! they all had to cover the cost....which oddly in the end, my FIL paid for so they all could've had it done for free...but NO ONE EXPECTED it to be paid for.

she wants you too pay or she wont wear any?! Thats just NUTS! Does she know how much weddings are and how much cash has came out of your bank account?! OMG BM like that I just wanna trip as they walk down the asile! I understand shes going to be your SIL so you may not wanna speak up...so this is when FH needs too tell his sister to get over it and cough up some cash and get it done or have someone else help her if she cant do it herself!!!
oh man im soooo mad for you!

Wait a second... This is your sister in law. What did she do for her own wedding? Were you a bridesmaid? Did she pay for all the hair, makeup, dresses, food, shoes, etc for all her bridesmaids?

I still say call her bluff and stick to your guns - tell her if she doesn't want to pay for makeup, she doesn't have to.

Then just make sure that the photographer is aware that they are not to waste any more film than is absolutely necessary on her.

I actually did this with my brother. He didn't stay for portraits because his 2 girls were late, getting ready at home (this is a very common thing) and I had told him beforehand that nothing on that day is waiting on him. So I have no - absolutely no - pictures of him from that day. And I am completelly fine with that.